bslchump Posted January 25, 2011 Posted January 25, 2011 For about 2 weeks I was feeling pretty good. Rather than being mean to her or spiteful, I just kind of had a "freewheeling" attitude where I told myself I didn't give a rats ass what she was doing and did whatever made me happy. I was nice to her and it reduced a lot of tension around the house, making me feel a whole lot better about everything. About a week ago, however, I started feeling incredibly angry/frustrated/betrayed all over again. I haven't been speaking to her or anything like that and I'm sure she's not sure why, but I feel like if we talked I would blow up at her for everything. It might make me feel better while I'm doing it, but it would make me look like a child and I would feel worse afterward. I just can't shake the feeling that she got off too "easy". She manipulated me, started a relationship with another guy before she dumped me, and seems to have no remorse except when she was confronted. I feel like she should HURT for messing up my life and future so much. When I think about being friendly with her now I just get this feeling of disgust and anger. I know, NC would solve this, but as I've stated in previous posts that isn't an option at the moment. I HAVE to live with her for now. I don't know what she's doing with this new guy and it's making my imagination run wild. She could very well have lost interest in him and I'm getting worked up over nothing. This whole thing has left me drained and lethargic. I'm upset all the time now and I have no energy or desire to do anything but mope and picture how happy she is. I hope she becomes miserable with this new guy...
ByMyselfForNow Posted January 25, 2011 Posted January 25, 2011 I'm in the same boat as you. My ex also left me for someone else, we work together so we see each other every day, she also has no remorse for what happened. Maybe our ex'es are twins It's really hard when NC is impossible. Maybe try channeling that anger into something else, like going to the gym or get a new energy consuming hobby. It's easier for them because, even if you don't like it, they're also probably concentration on the new guy. I'm sorry I have no good answer and I won't lie to you, I still have my bad days, but as time passes by you'll feel better. Just don't confront her anymore, it's not worth it and you won't obtain what you're looking for.
Author bslchump Posted January 25, 2011 Author Posted January 25, 2011 You know, it even just helps knowing there's someone out there who is going through this too. Terrible as it is for you. I have actually been hitting the gym really hard for the first time in...ever and I look my best. I've been taking care of my health extremely well and that's really the only thing that's keeping my spirits up. Unfortunately I can't really lift weights every day so I still have off-days where I need something to do. I'm struggling to find a hobby I can occupy myself with between my gym visits. How do you deal with stuff?
ByMyselfForNow Posted January 25, 2011 Posted January 25, 2011 As I've posted in another thread, I've made a post-breakup resolution to learn a new, no matter how insignificant, thing every day. That feeling kind of helps me get her off my mind.
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