Cupidcop Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Where to begin.....Ok I have lived with my boyfriend for the past year. Everything has been going good but I feel myself wanting more of a committment. Actually lately when there's been special occassions, I almost kind of wait to see if that's going to be the day he asks me to marry him. I never say anything to him to let him know that when that time comes, and I get nothing, that my feelings are truely hurt. Recently, his mother and sister have made comments to me and him, which resulted in him getting very agnry. I didn't say anything in front of them, I asked him later on the way home, why he got so mad. He said that he doesn't want to live his life the way other people think he should. Well his mom asked me about how I felt about us living together and not being married, actually she said "do you not think you deserve for him to ask you". So, now I am even more confused on what I should think. I know that we have talked about the whole "marriage" thing and he has said that he is scared to death because both his parents have been married and divorced several times. Which I can understand coming from the same background but on the other hand I want more. We are pretty much the only couple around our friends that aren't married. I am trying to see both sides but I can't help but feel like he's just with me until something better comes around and that's why he doesn't want to marry me. He says that I complete him and he couldn't live without me, well then why would he not want to marry me? I guess I just believe that if he was truely in love with me and there was no doubt in his mind that he wanted to be with me (after a year of living together and getting to have all the benefits of being married without the committment) then why would he not want to ask. I almost feel as if I'm giving him everything I have and not getting the same back.
Seaofclouds Posted January 25, 2011 Posted January 25, 2011 Have you explained to him how important marriage is to you? He's told you he's afraid of marriage, so it could be something he just doesn't have any plans for. You need to sit down with him and have a conversation about where your relationship is headed. If marriage is really important for you and something you really want, then you need to let him know that. And if it's something he's completely against, you'll have to decide if you can handle it never happening or if you need to move on and find someone that will marry you someday.
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