andy77 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 I met my girlfriend about 5 years ago when she sold me a ticket. We started seeing each other and became good friends very quickly. She was dating another guy so nothing ever happened however, there was def something brewing. After a while she broke up with him but I never took it further as I believe everyone needs time to get over the past before starting something new. At about the same time I met someone else and decided that it was best not to have too much contact with her as to prevent any complications in my new relationship so we never really spoke for about a year and a half. During that time, I broke up with my girlfriend and we made contact again. Things very quickly developed back to where they were and soon we were dating each other. We dated for just under 2 years and due to complications and the fact that she wasn't sure about taking our relationship forward, we stopped it. During our time together, one of our biggest problems was her "friendship" with her ex (someone new she dated while I was with the other women). He was still very much in love with her and couldn't stand to see me with her so when they caught up, it was always just the 2 of them. This always made me feel very uncomfortable as I believe she should have taken put our relationship first. She always promised that nothing was going on and she was only there as a friend as she says she has always maintained her relationships with her ex's. I'm just not sure if she just liked the attention she got from the other guy? After we broke up, I learnt that they did kiss on 2 occasions but she stopped it quickly. Obviously, this hurt a lot! We stayed in contact and about 8 months ago, I was away on business and she flew up to see me to ask if we could give it another try. She said she felt so much stronger and could see a future for us. We started seeing each other again and all was going well until I had to go to dubai for work. I was gone for 3 months and when I got back I could sense that something was a bit strange. But to cut a long story short, she made some new friends when I was away and when I got back she obviously carried on seeing on seeing them but once again, with me not invited. Due to what happened in the past, I asked if there was anything I sould be worried about and she laughed and said absolutely not. Then, this weekend, she was away for business and when I got back to her place, I found a letter from this new guy saying how much she loves her etc etc. I didn't pay much attention as she is very beautiful and often gets things like this. However, one problem, he mentioned how much he loved the 2 times they kissed and when she let him stay the night. Furt and shocked can not explain what I'm going through. We obviously spoke, and she finally told me everything and how they did kiss twice but also how quickly she stopped it because of me. She said that she never wanted to say anything to me as we were doing so well and didn't want to put a spanner in the works. Normally, I wouldn't tolerate this but I'm torn as we have such good energy together and I can truly see a future for us. She obviously has things to work on but not sure what I should do from this point on... Any advice would be great.
PegNosePete Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Welcome dude. Sorry for your situation. I am a bit confused reading your story. She kissed him 2 times when you were together first time. Then when you got back together again did she kiss him another 2 times? Or was she reminiscing with him about the original 2 times? Either way their friendship is totally inappropriate. If she wants to be with you then she needs to end it with him. She is getting all the attention he showers her with and lapping it up. This is not the behaviour of someone committed to their relationship.
Author andy77 Posted January 24, 2011 Author Posted January 24, 2011 No, she kissed her ex when we were together the first time and then kissed this other guy when we got back together the the last time when I was in dubai. Thanks for your thoughts. Its so good to know I'm not going insane.
PegNosePete Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 OK thanks for the clarification. It seems she has not changed at all. She is doing exactly the same thing she did first time. Her words do not match up with her actions. She is a serial cheater and liar. You need to dump her and move on.
Bryanp Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Aside from the kissing she let him stay the night with her? When do you think they did - play checkers? If the roles were reversed and you let another women spend the night at your place and kissed her do you think she would be as accepting as you are. If you two are doing so well then why would she let a guy spend the night and kiss him? The reality is that she is playing you for a fool and again shows no respect for you whatsoever. If you do not respect yourself then who will?
seibert253 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Let see if we have this right? She admitted to kissing him twice. She let him spend the night, but of course "nothing happened". The other dude sends her a letter about how he's in love with your GF Maybe it's me, but the bullsh#t meter is registering off the chart on this one. Dude, your GF is lying to you. If you read enough threads here, you will find when a when a WSO says, "we only kissed", it really means some form of sex occurred. Minimizing my friend. Get out now, while you still can.
cmh2002 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Sorry man but she hasn't changed at all! if it was truly an accident and nothing happened but kissing she should of come right to you and told you what happened. I wouldn't trust her.
GivenUp0083 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 "He who marries a beautiful woman will have many sleepless nights"
aerogurl87 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 History repeats itself usually in a relationship. Let a person get away with something once and 9 times out of 10 it will happen again as you've experienced yourself. Time to cut your losses and find someone else.
Distant78 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Dude. She screwed him. She just won't admit it. She kissed him multiple times, is lying to you, and is acting like it's not a big deal. Drop her and find someone who will never cheat on you. You don't need trash like her. Tell her she can keep seeing him without you in the picture. And her ex is a ****ing idiot.
Binster Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Can't say for certain what has gone on, but it really does'nt look good, does it.
moloko Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 We obviously spoke, and she finally told me everything and how they did kiss twice but also how quickly she stopped it because of me. ya, uh huh:rolleyes: She said that she never wanted to say anything to me as we were doing so well and didn't want to put a spanner in the works. if she thought you 2 were doing so well, she wouldn't have let him kiss her, let alone twice. Normally, I wouldn't tolerate this but I'm torn as we have such good energy together and I can truly see a future for us. She obviously has things to work on but not sure what I should do from this point on... Any advice would be great. if she is cheating this early when things are good, then just wait until you have been with her a while. if she can cheat when things are good, I'll hate to see when you guys have problems, and you will have problems, whether small or big. dump her. she has betrayed you early in the game and shown you great disrespect when things were suppose to be good between you.
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