Melodie Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Ended up caving and texting my ex again this weekend. Ugh. Just so angry how he just seemed to move on so quickly. He warned me he was going to block me if he heard from me again. After we were both lashing out at each other. Then I send just one more apologising for everything and for hurting him. It was normal couple stuff we broke up over. No cheating or anything. The only reply I get back is that he is blocking me for good and that he is very annoyed with me. . Decided to go back to no contact now. Have no idea if my ex was bluffing or not. Not going to find out. He should understand why I have been doing what I am doing. Hopefully later on he realises things were not as bad as he is making it out to be right now. Just can't believe how cold he is being.
cerridwen Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Oh melodie! You were so committed to not letting him see you sweat!
Country_Girl Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Melodie- Just start up NC again, I know it's hard, but it will get better with time. This might sound really stupid...but I kinda play a game with it, I copied a calender image off the internet, and every night I get a little bit of confidence back when I get to mark an "x" on it. The x meaning, I successfully maintained NC another day. It actually makes me feel good being able to put that on there, shows I have some willpower. Everytime I think of contacting, I think about that calender, and how I'm going to feel if I have to put an "C" on there and start all over again. From what I have read on these forums, and it makes sense, anytime you contact them you will further push them away and help them justify the breakup. You will be perceived as weak, and people do not want a weak partner. You have to go NC, otherwise your healing process will have to start over each time you talk to them. They can't miss you if you're not gone! You can do this!
Author Melodie Posted January 24, 2011 Author Posted January 24, 2011 I know Cerridwen. I am still living in the place we have lived at together. Moving out of here to a new area this weekend which will make things easier to move on. Hopefully. Thanks Country_Girl. Time will tell. I guess...
cerridwen Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Moving will help. Your ex is ahead of you in the process of moving on but you can do some catch-up by placing your focus elsewhere...like...umm...decorating your new place! Can you think of other things you can do to speed up your recovery? Need suggestions?
marqueemoon4 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 don't feel bad, I did too. sent a txt, got nothing but coldness back. what a dummy.
Rainboww Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 I totally get why you sent that text. At the time you think it will make things seem better but it's like digging a deeper hole for yourself! My ex said the same thing to me.. 'If I hear from you again, I'l change my number' I was totally embarrased at my behaviour. I vanished from his life. Been NC for around 4 months now.. Horrible.
depplover_1980 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 No sweat girl, my ex fiancee did this to me and actually it is the kindest thing they can do. No keeping you hanging on, just pure rejection with no ways to negotiate around it. Means you have to dig in deep and face it's over and in 6 months time you'll he smiling again. If it makes you feel smugger, the reason is because he won't be able to move on with you around so needs to block you out in order to forget how fabulous you really are!! x
justletgox51 Posted January 25, 2011 Posted January 25, 2011 Awww man, what you did was exactly what I did too! I kept chasing after him, basically begging and pleading and in the end I end up becoming wounded, pushed him farther away, deleted and blocked off Facebook, and completely ignores me at our school. It's tough for me because I see him everyday in the halls, and in departments. However, you have to remember that there's a time when you just have to realize that you had enough. After a whole month of chasing after him (a few weeks of silence but caved in on Christmas day) I realized, I was just wasting my time. I went completely after Christmas (greeting him, apologizing and hurting me in the end) NC for technically 30 days now (one day I said hello to him in the halls - completely ignored, and one day again said 'hello.' on MSN - he didn't delete me off msn and he told my best friend that it's too early to be friends or to talk) and tomorrow will be exactly one month of NC from my ex. We both didn't cheat on each other, just like yours basically couple stuff... -Sigh- It's going to be so hard but day by day it'll become less painful.. Let's take it day by day.
Author Melodie Posted January 25, 2011 Author Posted January 25, 2011 I was only texting about our place at first. The final details. Then my ex's mate texts me pretending to be a girl and I ended up flipping. He ends up apologising after realising he went to far also went on about how he was not gay. I was like thinking. What is that guy even doing with my number in the first place. My ex apologises as well for that and backed up he's mates story. After my ex texts back if I hear from u again. I am blocking u. Ended up apologising the next day saying sorry about the whole break up and hurting u. Will leave u alone now. Then he says he is bloking me. I was just trying to put things right. I bet he thought I was going to retaliate to that but I decided not to, to prove I wasn't going to message again. That is how that all came about. Grr. Thanks Depplover. Hopefully that is the case. Besides a few issues we had I was very good to him. He even said I was the love of he's life before all this happened. He was mine as well. It sux how things can change from that to this. Cerridwen. The move is definately keeping my mind off the break up. Looking forward to the change, different surroundings. Also have been going to the Gym and hanging out with friends. Glad I don't have he's number on my phone at least. That helps as well.
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