chelle21689 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 This is a complete nightmare that I can't escape. I never thought this day would come because we've gone through bumps in our relationship and hung on no matter how hard it got. I thought things were going great.... Today, he called me begging me to get on Skype. We're long distance of 2 1/2 years. He was crying and I suddenly knew...because he never cries. He told me that he hasn't felt the same about me anymore...and it's been a month. He waited till I visited to see if it'd change but it hasn't. We had a fun time but he said it wasn't the same....the way he felt when I hugged him, kissed him, all of that. I don't understand at all. My looks hasn't changed nor has my personality. He's that same guy I'm in love with and envisioned my life with. He's being deployed this year and I just want to be there all I can for him....I also bought my $400 ticket to see him in March a few weeks ago... How the hell could he not be in love with me anymore after ALL these years and everything we ever been through? I wish WISH WISH I could change his mind..I'm having a really rough time. I keep thinking about him dating other girls, him fallin in love with someone else, and it just freaking hurts so badly. I never had a break up before. I'm 21 by the way.
folieadeux Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 I'm so sorry Chelle. I know you're going through a hard time right now, but please keep in mind that it has nothing to do with your looks nor personality. Sometimes people just grow apart...especially when you get together so young. You're hardly the same people you were at 16 than you are at 21. I had my first serious breakup at 21 as well. I never thought I'd get through it, even though I was the one who called it quits, but you do. You're young and have your whole life ahead of you. Be sure to take care of yourself and not focus so much on the what ifs because they only make an already difficult situation even worse.
Els Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Chelle... I know this isn't what you wanted to hear, but from reading all your previous posts, I can honestly say I saw it coming. That sort of insecurity bodes well for no relationship, but an LDR cannot survive with it. This is not to say that it was your fault. He did things that no man in a relationship should do. And it turned into a vicious cycle. I think it made both of you miserable, hence this. I am really sorry, I know the first time hurts badly, but we all live and learn from it. Almost NOBODY has never had a painful breakup in their lives. {{{hugs}}} Hope you feel better soon.
xpaperxcutx Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but some relationships do grow apart. Whether he had other reasons ( ie. dating other girls) that made him decide to break up, the main problem is that he's not " in love" anymore. By the way, you're 21, you still have years ahead of you to meet new people and fall in love. People tend to grow from first relationships. Hopefully you can move past from this and meet new people.
gator12 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 The fact is you guys were young, each other's first loves and he just fell out of love. It's hard and I'm so sorry for it, but there's nothing you can do about it, no amount of begging will fix this. The best bet is to go strict NC and move one. He may come back at some point in the future, who knows. Oooo here's a guide for you posted by CaliGuy it really helped me with my breakup http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t81399/ Don't worry there, you're young beautiful and have got a lot to offer to the world. The best thing you can do right now is focus on you. -All the best
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