luvloss Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Yesterday I found out that the guy I had been seeing for the past five months has had a girlfriend for the past three years. I confronted him and he refused to give me answers, he wouldn't even have the decency to talk about it over the phone..he would only give me half-answers through texts. He refused to give me straight answers and eventually I just texted him that he hurt me and wished him the best and that I was not going to contact him again. I told him that he really did break my heart. This was a guy that i realy cared for. I spent, time, energy, and money on him. I also let him meet my family...which I never do. I told him on numerous occassions that I had been so hurt in the past by cheating and asked him on numerous occassions to just be honest with me if he ever wanted to be with someone else. I know I did the best thing by just removing myself from the situation, but I feel like I'm dying. I'm soooo hurt and angry. I can't believe he just used me the entire time. I have no idead how I'm going to get through this. It's even worse because I have to somehow make my own closure since he would not offer any answers. My heart is really broken.
Treasa Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Oh honey, I'm so sorry. What an A**HOLE! For starters, you have to realize this. He was a bad person, and he lied to you, and he's a complete jerk, and you can do so much better. I know that doesn't help how you're feeling right now, but seeing him without the rose-tinted sunglasses is a good way to start. Finding your own closure IS hard. From your post I can see that you're very strong. Trust me, you'll make it through this, and you'll realize someday what a jerk he was. My ex-boyfriend, who I dated for six years, broke up with me last May. I was suicidal for five weeks, desperate to get him back, and then something inside me snapped and I realized that I didn't want to be with who he really was, anyway. You'll be ok. Right now the minutes are going to feel like hours, and the hours are going to feel like days. Make sure you talk to friends or family, get exercise, take care of yourself, and fill your time with goals and hobbies. Try not to have any contact with him if you can help it. You'll definitely make it through this, but I know how much it hurts.
Author luvloss Posted January 23, 2011 Author Posted January 23, 2011 Thank you for the support. I have swore to myself that I will not contact him. I have blocked him from facebook and deleated all of his other contact information. I'm blessed because I do have great friends and family for support and i'm just trying to keep that in mind. I really do believe that when people are cruel and dishonest to others, they will eventually have to pay/answer for it. I'm just going to try my best to move on from this.
2010_Sorry Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Can you block him from texting you through your cell phone provider? I can tell you that you that when/if he tries to reach out to you later on down the road, it could cause all of these emotions to come back... Do what you can now to prevent an "in" for him at all! So sorry that this is happening, what a complete jerk!
Author luvloss Posted January 23, 2011 Author Posted January 23, 2011 Great suggestion! I will look into blocking any calls/texts from him by my service provider. I'm thinking of him as if he is an infection that I have to stop before it spreads anymore.
vtbrokenhearted Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I'm so sorry you have to learn about all of the lies, but you will get through this. I hear exactly what you're saying because I said it to myself for about two months, and sometimes the feeling comes back, but not as badly. You will get through this, and eventually you'll meet a wonderful man who won't lie to you in this way. Just like Treasa said, he is the one who's done a horrible thing, he's the bad person. Keep your chin up; there are so many beautiful things in the world, don't lose sight of them.
broken-and-lost Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 you sound like a really nice girl it's a shame that someone would treat you this way for their own selfish needs remember you deserve better and you will get better
Author luvloss Posted January 23, 2011 Author Posted January 23, 2011 Coming to this site has been the only bit of peace I have had in the past 24 hrs. Thank you all. I'm to believe that his pain will stop. What is so hard for me at the moment is the fact that I allowed myself to trust him after being hurt in the sam in the past. I feel stupid and like I was just a piece of trash to him. And while I can't stop crying and unable to eat or sleep, he is just going on with his life with his girlfriend.
Graceful Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I know I did the best thing by just removing myself from the situation, but I feel like I'm dying. I'm soooo hurt and angry. I can't believe he just used me the entire time. I have no idead how I'm going to get through this. It's even worse because I have to somehow make my own closure since he would not offer any answers. My heart is really broken.You don't see it this way just now b/c you're too raw from the shock that you were dating a liar, cheater, azzhat, and total juicebag (did I cover everything? ) -- but seriously, you don't see that you have all the closure you need just in finding out who he really is. You have every reason to feel angry, but seriously, once your anger subsides and you see that you did nothing wrong, you were lied to and trusted this guy (why shouldn't you have trusted him, you liked him), you'll be able to take a step back and see that it's his problem, and not only that, feel sorry for his "GF" --- I mean, really? What kind of person goes around treating people like the way this guy does? The kind of person you don't want in your life. Vent and let the anger go, and realize you only wasted a few months on the jerk. Block, delete, remove, you know the drill. Get support from your great friends and family. Just wish some of us on LS could get hold of this guy .... grrrrrrrrr. He'd have hell to pay!! Take care, honey.
broken-and-lost Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Coming to this site has been the only bit of peace I have had in the past 24 hrs. Thank you all. I'm to believe that his pain will stop. What is so hard for me at the moment is the fact that I allowed myself to trust him after being hurt in the sam in the past. I feel stupid and like I was just a piece of trash to him. And while I can't stop crying and unable to eat or sleep, he is just going on with his life with his girlfriend. What your feeling is normal hun doesn't matter if it was 5 months 5 years it's normal to feel hurt but don't feel like a fool for opening your heart to someone if you stop doing that you stop living and you might miss the actual person who deserves your love. i closed myself off for years as a result i pushed away the nice person i'd been looking for all my life your not a fool you have a heart sometimes they get broken as a result
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