lifeasiknowit Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I'm 26, female and still a virgin. I'm thin and not deformed, but actually average looking, but because of my shyness, I have yet to lose the big V. I've started to date more, but have never been in a relationship. Would this weird a guy out to discover at my age I'm still a virgin? Would it be a red flag that there's something wrong with me?
forrest Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 100 yrs to your question, and no, it won't weird out most quality guys.
zengirl Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I'd say most people lose their virginity between 14-22, so yes, you're outside the most common age bracket. Sure, there are some men who will find it odd or off-putting that you've never had sex, or never had a relationship. And there are others who won't care. All you can do is own who you are and go forward in a positive way. I don't think it's some kind of major handicap.
Nexus One Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Men will actually see that as a plus. The virginity I mean.
BobSacamento Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 It's just a label. I believe getting caught up with labels wastes time and opportunities...unless we are talking politics
PerpetualMotion Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I don't see it as a plus or a minus. As Bob said, it's just a label.
Nexus One Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I should have put the word "some" in front of that line in my last reply.
O'Malley Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 It's not an issue; if anything, there may be more curiosity about why you haven't dated or been in a relationship (which you explained in your post). Your overall attitudes towards dating and sex is more important. When you choose to become romantically and/or sexually involved, you can decide at that point whether you're comfortable being honest about your inexperience or simply not mention it.
TouchedByViolet Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I don't think it is a negative at all. I would be curious to know why though.
Author lifeasiknowit Posted January 23, 2011 Author Posted January 23, 2011 I don't think it is a negative at all. I would be curious to know why though. I'm just extremely shy, especially around men. I get super flustered when I get male attention and just kind of block them out because I don't know how to deal with it. My parents were also very controlling and conservative, and I have insecurity issues.
HeavenOrHell Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 My ex was a virgin and no way did he suck in bed. Well he did suck-but in good way! Inexperienced men like virgins while the experienced men don't. Virgins simply suck in bed.
irc333 Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Inexperienced men like virgins while the experienced men don't. Virgins simply suck in bed. Yeah, but they gain experience.
hydorclops Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 BobSacamento: It's just a label. I believe getting caught up with labels wastes time and opportunities...unless we are talking politics Even if you have experience, it's always the first time with a new person. It's OK to be uncertain and it helps if you display some curiosity.
Disillusioned Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 There was nothing wrong with being a virgin until a bunch of promiscuous people in the Sixties got tired of being stigmatized, then they started that stuff about virgins being bad people. Ask just about anyone what's wrong with being a virgin past one's teen years, and their answers will generally be pretty vague... but they'll all say there's something wrong with it.
Citizen Erased Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Any guy that is scared away by you being a virgin is not the right guy for you to experience your first time with anyway.
counterman Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I agree with CE. Some may find it off-putting, some may not. Just don't bother with the ones that do see something wrong with it.
aerogurl87 Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Nothing wrong with being a virgin. And most guys I know would love to be with a woman who is a virgin, not matter what her age is. Just wait and lose it to the right guy because losing it to the wrong person will hurt you emotionally and possibly physically, in the end.
sweet sugar Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 If you start dating someone, and it feels right, just do it but don't tell him you're a virgin. He doesn't even need to know that, if it makes you uncomfortable for guys to know that.
Questionis Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I'm 26, female and still a virgin. I'm thin and not deformed, but actually average looking, but because of my shyness, I have yet to lose the big V. Would it be a red flag that there's something wrong with me? Don't worry just keep dating and when you pick someone suitable you will lose it then. Don't just tell people casually unless you know you can trust them and no-one will ever make you feel bad bout it.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 I agree with it just being a label. I'm 28 and a virgin, and I feel content with it. If someone has a problem with it, it's their problem.
irc333 Posted January 23, 2011 Posted January 23, 2011 Good point Disillusioned....it's kind of like the equivalent of people who get plastered on booze at a party, and seem to take issue with someone who doesn't drink or "nurses" a beer all night. I've even heard booze-heads claim "that they'll never trust a person that doesn't drink". People who had partaken in indulgences feel bad that they had, and somehow just assume that a person who does NOT partake in indulgences (casual sex, drinking, recreational drugs, etc) like to "flip it around" in a futile attempt to make the more scrupulous person somehow "freakish" or out of place. There was nothing wrong with being a virgin until a bunch of promiscuous people in the Sixties got tired of being stigmatized, then they started that stuff about virgins being bad people. Ask just about anyone what's wrong with being a virgin past one's teen years, and their answers will generally be pretty vague... but they'll all say there's something wrong with it.
Disillusioned Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 I've even heard booze-heads claim "that they'll never trust a person that doesn't drink". Believe it or not, most of the people I've met when I've visited San Bernardino county believe exactly that. BTW they think if you're old enough to walk, you're old enough to handle beer and cigarettes. People who had partaken in indulgences feel bad that they had, and somehow just assume that a person who does NOT partake in indulgences (casual sex, drinking, recreational drugs, etc) like to "flip it around" in a futile attempt to make the more scrupulous person somehow "freakish" or out of place. Sounds like the guy nextdoor. He knows I very rarely drink... every couple of years, I'll have a rum and Coke at home... but every time one of us drops in on the other, he tries to offer me a beer. He's always getting soused and pissing his wife off... hardly a day goes by when I her her yelling at him for acting like a drunken jerk. Oh yeah, look what I'm missing out on!
pookster72 Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 i'd imagine its a plus to some and a negative to others. given that you're conservative and shy yourself, youd probably tend to go for the types of guys that wouldn't mind anyway.
radiodarcy Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 i was a virgin until i was 32 if that makes you feel any better
Els Posted January 24, 2011 Posted January 24, 2011 Huh, I'm 24 and a technical virgin. No biggie. I know many, many people my age or older who haven't had intercourse either. I don't get what's with people and vaginal intercourse, anyway. To be honest, even though I would definitely like to try vaginal one day, I don't see it as a big thing if I don't. It is just one of many sexual activities. What hydroclorps said about each person being different is quite right anyhow. I also think that knowledge, open-mindedness, willingness to experiment, and eagerness to please completely outweigh any sort of 'experience' a person might have.
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