lostmycool Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 (edited) Last weekend my now ex-girlfriend, who I share an apartment with, and I got into a fight and she ended up breaking up with me. She almost instantly moved out and left me to a near empty apartment. I am still in shock, but have been going to therapy, and even though I'd like to work it out, doing my best to continue NC. Anyway, we both signed the lease. She wanted to move out, didn't give me an option, and has already done so. With her moving out, I have to pay her half of the rent, which is an additional 1K a month for me. That's expensive. In addition to that, she wants me to give her $$ for a trip we took to Austin over Thanksgiving to visit my parents, as well as "reemburse" her for supplies of a a shelf I made for our place. Add it all up, and it's a lot of money. Finally, she also is trying to get her name taken off the lease. She called the landlord and emailed me saying the landlord was going to redo the lease in just my name. I haven't responded or agreed to anything. She has emailed me twice in the past two days, but I'm too emotional to respond, so I haven't. I've kept NC. What should I do? It seems very unfair. Edited January 22, 2011 by lostmycool
valdeetz1 Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 Sorry to hear about your break-up. It does seem unusualy cruel and unfair given what you've said. I will say this though: IMO if you didnt already have a verbal/written agreement to pay her back for the trip and shelf, you owe her jack. The trip was taken together as a couple, and as such unless previously discussed that you would pay for it you dont owe her back for that. She wants you to pay for the supplies for the shelf? well once again done while a couple as like...community property or whatever. If you wanted to be hard about it you could charge her for labor I imagine it comes out even or in your favor that way- not recomended though. I'm not trying to stir the pot for you, that is just how I think. As for the lease- even if the landlord redoes it its not legite if you dont resign it. If you cant afford to stay there, I'd talk to him, take the fine for breaking the lease and split it 50-50 which is how it should be. Just because she left doesnt make her any less responsible for what she signed on for. And sticking you with a place you might not be able to afford is unfair and childish. Sometimes when a break up happens, people are angry and try to do things like that- especially us women. He pull that filing cabinet of IOU's and things we havent thought about in years. It's not fair, and I watched enough court tv to know unless they got it in writing and junk they probably aint getting that money back even if they take it that far. Breaking up and then calling in all these 'loans' and 'favors' for pay back when there would have been no question about it if the break up didnt happen is simply immature and shows how shallow they can be. I know- I thought about doing somethng similar as I was the dumpee- I've got about 500 dollars in clothes for the ex that he said he would pay me back for after he got on his feet- he's been out of work for 2 months because of his accident. He never did and we split up last month. Well I could do the same thing she is- only I WAS told I would get it back. Am I going to? No- its not worth dragging it out. Cut my loses and try to work on me.
pookster72 Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 i doubt she can legally do any of that. re-read the lease if you have it to make sure.
Star Gazer Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 Whether you want to take on the lease alone and pay that extra $1000/month, or break the lease and both be held liable for any rent and fees, etc., is up to you it seems. You don't want to force her to stay, do you? But I wouldn't dream of reimbursing her travel expenses for the trip.
BUENG1 Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 (edited) OP it is not in your best interest to agree to release the girlfriend from the lease. She is leaving and defaulting on the agreement there is no way you should stay and uphold the entire agreement. In order to agree to release her from the lease I would get some money from her, not the entire amount but something especially if you cannot afford the place on your own. The best option if the landlord will release you from the lease altogether. See if you can give him some up front money and get the girlfriend to split with you. You do not need to give her money for anything else. Stress to the landlord that you cannot afford the rent on your own. Evictions are expensive and the landlord might play ball. Edited January 22, 2011 by BUENG1
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