Author phineas Posted January 22, 2011 Author Posted January 22, 2011 She called me last night. Apparantly she thinks i'm a player. Is this an attention whore tactic? She tells me she imagines me as the type of guy going out to bars with lots of hot chicks, thinks I'm seeing multiple women, asked me about my GF ect. Told me ALL the dogs at work are trying to get a piece of her & she considered me part of the pack. I was literally speechless. She mentions all the women who text me when we are out together ect. I don't even look at my phone when it beeps. But it does beep a lot. Thier all stupid forwards by attention whores I know. The last woman I tried dateing didn't come out and say it, but she would always check up on me when I wasn't with her & asking where I was & who I was with. (but that chick had an army of orbiters & was talking to her ex's so...) Ok. I'm 5'8" half bald, at least 15lbs overweight. But at 39 I do have a good amount of muscle on me from lifting weights. I did loose 55lbs so far. I am very outgoing & sociable. I don't have a problem approaching women when out at all. Women do flirt with me allot at work & everyone generally likes me in the work place because I know my job & do it well. But i'm no player. Every woman I ever hungout with or went out with turned out to be major attention whores that friendzoned me. Probably because I didn't try to have sex with them on the first or 2nd date. So yeah, last summer I got divorced. I went out to the local weekly summer concerts with quite a few different attractive women. People from work did see me with these women. But how do you tell a chick who thinks your a player that you havn't been laid in almost 2 yrs, keep getting friendzoned, spend 4 nights a week with your kids, when you don't have them you are either out with her, playing World of warcraft, working on your house or watching SyFy without sounding like a complete looser? She said she wants to hang out again. I did in fact try to have sex with her when she was at my house & she is still talking to me. so either she really does think i'm a player or thinks i'm just harmless? I'm really confused here. This chick is on POF updating her profile. I know because I just became a member & she popped up as being online today. So something is def. fishy. I might still hang out with her but a meet up from POF will take precedence.
dispatch3d Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 I chose this! " am I doing this right or am I coming off as some bitter butt-hurt looser?" Since really your "experience" with this woman basically describes every girl under the age of 23.
dispatch3d Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 She tells me she imagines me as the type of guy going out to bars with lots of hot chicks, thinks I'm seeing multiple women, asked me about my GF ect. Told me ALL the dogs at work are trying to get a piece of her & she considered me part of the pack. To me this just says that it looks like to her you are "in high demand". She probably is just uncertain whether she can hold on to you/keep you/whatever. I don't know, it sounds like she views you as too good for her? She uses words like "player" because she likely doesn't want to take responsibility for how she's feeling (ie. it's something you are doing wrong, not something she is doing wrong. Almost everyone is like this). The second part I translate as roughly she is also in high demand. It's hard to say though, it sounds like she kind of has a warped perception (I guess our own perception as guys is warped as well). I would avoid trying to talk your way into a relationship. Girls and guys think differently, and I think your attempt to talk her into this has triggered her attempt to talk you into this. Except neither of you is speaking the same language so it isn't working. And yeah, she's probably dating multiple guys. A lot of signs are there. Oh and she does legitamately think you are a player. Whether that is actually a bad thing or not I don't know. I would guess it's more of a compliment.
irc333 Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 She's an idiot for calling you a "player", that's like a woman calling ME a player, it simply is not true. Chances are she's just making up a lie, and isn't interested.
Author phineas Posted January 22, 2011 Author Posted January 22, 2011 I will say she was with 1 guy for 10yrs. She was engaged to be married & I think around 34, she caught him cheating. So now she is 38, never married, no kids, life pretty much wrecked i'd say. So i'm wondering if she still has issues based on that experience. she is a good looking woman but she has a few extra pounds on her like I do so she is always asking me to work out or do things that will burn calories so she can loose weight. I never really complimented her because whenever I do that women seem to think you want them & start playing games. Dudes constantly hit on her at work though. I don't hit on anybody. They flirt with me first. always. I'm thinking now i'll just hit her up once in a while or see if she contacts me & make her low priority. I wasn't trying to talk her into a relationship, I was just letting her know my intentions verbally which I now know was dumb because i'm pretty sure it was a no-brainer on her end.
dispatch3d Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 I never really complimented her because whenever I do that women seem to think you want them & start playing games. Dudes constantly hit on her at work though. I don't hit on anybody. They flirt with me first. always. Yeah this has been my experience as well.
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