jessy1 Posted January 20, 2011 Posted January 20, 2011 (edited) Hey everyone Just having a bit of a rant I guess to try and feel better. I don't know if you remember my last post but I think I basically got 'played' or used by a guy I loved We work together and since we met (only about 4 or so months ago) we have basically been inseperable at work. We were always laughing/ joking and cuddling in each others offices. We spent heaps of time together and got up to heaps of michief! I loved coming to work to see him and he always said the same. People commented on us all the time saying how cute we were. We got teased soo much but I loved it! Anyway besides all the carry on at work we would hang out of work alot and he would call and txt me everyday and it was the cutest stuff. He would tell me I was the only girl for him and that I didnt have to share him and that he didn't want to lose me bla bla He sent me a we card saying he loved me. He pulled aside work mates and would tell them about 'us' and much he liked me etc. I was on cloud nine with this guy! To cut a long story very short he was sleeping with other people. He was also sending other people the same txts as he would send me. One day, a week or so ago, I get 'xxxx miss you'. Literally the next day he comes into work and annoucnes he has a new gf. I am heartbroken. At work I have stayed away from him completely and ignored him totally. He seems to think he has done no wrong and still tried to talk to me as normal. I tried to take a stand and tell my self I was sick of being used and lied to by this guy so I would give a short answer and excuse myself and leave. Like I said we were inseperable before so its very obvious I am angry. The hardest thing was when he came up to me the day of annoucning his gf to everyone at work and said 'I am sooo happy, I love my life right now' It was like an ultimate stab. Anyway the main point of this post is that I am utterly misrable. I miss him so so much. I miss all the mischeif we would get up to. I miss the cuddling and laughing in each others office. I miss all the amazing txts and calls calling me 'his girl' and saying i was the only one for him. I miss the play fight and I just miss how close we were. Now we don't even speak or look at each other. Everytime I walk past his office one of the boys is in there now and they are looking at photos of his gf and laughin about how hot she is. I am soo very hurt and I miss him and the fun we had so much. I dont go near him at work. I stay as far away as possible. However he keeps hanging around me so much more than necessary. He walks past like a million times a day and sometimes just stands there like he is expecting me to say something. I try to pick up the phone or something to look busy but I panic everytime With him acting like he has done nothing wrong I feel like I am being immature. AM I? I miss him sooo much and I hate the way we are now. I would kill to just go into his office and get a big hug. I think about him every night. It absolutly breaks me to think of her in his arms and not me anymore. The though of them sleeping together almost makes me vomit. I just don't understand why he would do this to me. He must have known he would lose me if he did this? I guess he just never cared about me. I just cant get into my head how someone could say they love you, be inseperable with you, send you cute txts and phone calls non stop, say how he has never been so close with anyone and doesn't want to lose you, then come into work and annouce to everyone he has a new gf????. Like two days before he makes this announcement I was still getting 'miss you xxxx '. He even came up to me and told me how happy he is with this gf and loves life when he knows dam well how i feel about him! THEN got upset when I am 'grumpy' with him. Finally from past experiences you don't just jump into a relationship with a girl you have just met so he must have had her on the go while he had me on the go. Makes me sick to my stomach and so dam sad I just dont understand??? Do you? Am I missing something?! It actually keeps me awake at night. How do I cope at work? I am misrable but try to put on a brave face and act like I dont care. Work isn't the same anymore and I miss it so much. Its really hard Edited January 20, 2011 by jessy1
Kansas Posted January 20, 2011 Posted January 20, 2011 Jessy1, I'm so sorry that this happened to you. There's nothing worse then completely loving somebody, only to find out that they lied to you. It makes every moment seem so fake and it feels like the world has fallen out from under you because all of a sudden everything you believed in was a lie. You have to remember, that you did nothing wrong in all of this. You trusted him. Did you have any reason to believe that he was lying to your? or seeing other people? He is the one who should be ashamed of his behavior and judging by the way he walks by your office numerous times, and stands there expecting you to say something - he clearly wants to hear that things are OK with the two of you and that you can somehow resume a buddy-buddy relationship. Years and years ago, I made the awful mistaking of falling for and dating my boss. We dated for a about 6 months before a girl, who identified herself as his girlfriend called the office. I was crushed but still had to continue working not only with him but FOR him directly. I avoided all unnecessary contact with him. It was strictly good morning, good afternoon and good night. Curt pleasantries and strictly business. Nothing more. I managed this for 3 months (until I found another job). It was really uncomfortable, but shy of leaving your job and not seeing him again, you're going to have to keep it strictly professional. The one thing that I don't understand is, you say that other people at work would see the two of you together and comment on how 'cute' you both were ... didn't they think it was odd that one day he waltzes in and suddenly has a new GF? And now they're gushing all over her? I don't get it ...
Author jessy1 Posted January 20, 2011 Author Posted January 20, 2011 Thankyou for your reply I appreciate it. Today has been a really hard day. Ive had the day off and have been sitting at home trying to understand what happened. I HATE to think that everything was a lie. I also HATE to think of this new girl in his arms It tears me up. Because Im a bit of a crazy girl today I did a bit of stalking and found out that he has done this exact same thing to every girl in his life. He has been full on with them then all of a sudden runs and shuts them out. There are an insane amount of girls that seem to hate him!! What does this say about him?? (Sorry just trying to understand here) As for work no one really cares about me. They made a whole lot of jokes about how I must have a broken heart but besdies that no one really cared. No-one else cares either, they just say 'get over it and cheer up'. Its hard tho cause I love him and it hurts so much :( Despite everything I just cant stop missing him and wishing he was here with me again. It kills me to know she is now sleeping in his arms and im all alone. How do I deal with this pain. Every time I see him at work It lilke a knife in my heart. And lastly how do I come across as the better person? I did everything for him, went out of my way to make him happy. I feel silly
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