counterman Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 So, the last date I have had was 3 months ago and it was a first date. Last year, I had a string of first dates that went no further. After the last one, I was a bit jaded so stopped dating. I have been busy lately with a project but that is no excuse... I want to start dating again. The thing is, and it's always on the back of my mind, I'm still studying and don't have a car and other things. I don't know if I should just wait it out and concentrate on working and studying or just try anyways. That's mostly the problem, I haven't been trying. It's like I don't know what to do to start dating again. I have been noticing girls who I am very attracted too, at public places, whether it be the train station, cafe, hang out areas, etc. and it is almost becoming unbearable not dating. However, I just can't seem to approach and just talk to them. Any tips on how to get going again or my situation?
carhill Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 Be friendly with women you aren't attracted to. Get used to making casual conversation with women in general. Get to where it's like breathing. Then, step it up to someone who catches your eye *slightly*. Be friendly, I daresay not even flirty. Myself, when I need a tuneup, I pick married women I'm traveling with (whether that be in a hotel lobby, airplane, train station, whatever) whom I find attractive. No chance of anything happening but it hones the skills and no animals are killed in the process. The ladies generally enjoy the friendly banter too, and then we part ways never to see each other again. This reinforces appropriate investment. Man, I can't imagine a life without wheels. Hope that goes well. Good luck
Author counterman Posted January 19, 2011 Author Posted January 19, 2011 Thanks for the advice, carhill I have never thought of that. What I was thinking of was just forcing myself into talking to girls I find attractive with random approaches but I like your way better, sort of easing into it, and tuning up. I guess all the "practise" I have had has been to girls I have been attracted too, which meant that it was few and far in between. So, when you talk to these married woman, upon first meeting, you just casually converse with them? That's the thing, I haven't been able to just get started talking... part of me thinks that they'll think I am a creep. That wasn't my mind-set before though and I have had fun before with it. It sucks not having a car. I was started to think that I should just wait until I do have those resources to start dating again.
carhill Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 Most married women are married for a reason, and that's generally because they're pretty cool people. I often find them approaching me, or we catch something in common 'hey, is that your flight too?' and start from there. I'm a 'helper' and very travel-savvy, so I've helped with misconnections, navigating security, dealing with agents, etc. All those innocent things start conversations. It's a lot easier to talk with women than date them If you don't need a car in your area, don't worry about it. If I lived in NYC, I could date car-less no problem. Heck, even in Europe I dated fine without a car. Catch the metro, tube, whatever and off we went. Easy.
Author counterman Posted January 20, 2011 Author Posted January 20, 2011 Cool, thanks. Just have a conversation casually shouldn't be a problem. I'll see how it goes! I don't think it's a major problem, just a bit lame. However, if the girl really wants to have a date with me, then I don't think she'll care. I'll have a car eventually
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