Jump to content

Don't you think pride and ego and stubbornness limits your happiness?

fun2bewith

By fun2bewith
in Second Chances

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

Posted
Posted

Why can't I just say: "skrew this, I don't care about my pride and who is right, I want it sorted out and now and I don't care if I look weak"

 

Then I wish I can pick up the phone and talk about everything , ask all the questions that I have accumulated in the last 3 months...

 

Why is my pride so important?

january2011 Established Member

january2011

Posted
Posted

In terms of breaking NC, it protects you from doing something that you are likely to regret later.

lovesparis Established Member

lovesparis

Posted
Posted

i am one of those girls whose pride often gets in the way of things... i hate to admit failure, i'm stubborn, etc. after one really bad breakup i said that i was not going to let my pride get in the way this time and did everything i could to get him to change his mind about the break up. that didn't work either.

 

i hate to say it, but NC is *usually* the way to go. typically pride issues are for the dumper to cast aside if they decide to come back, not for the dumpee to cast aside. because at this point, we, the dumpees, feel like we have nothing to loose and if we throw our pride away we will likely do things that take away our dignity too.

marqueemoon4 Established Member

marqueemoon4

Posted
Posted

I think in my case, my wife has convinced her that SHE CAN'T give me another chance.. and if this is the case even if it could be a good thing to do she won't back off of it because she would be betraying herself? This is clearly a woman thing. I don't understand it, although I guess everyone has their breaking point and I pretty much pushed her over it.

810 Established Member

810

Posted
Posted

Why is my pride so important?

because it's all you have.

 

never underestimate your pride. it shields hurt and pain from penetrating/spreading out further. it's another way your body telling you that the person is not right for you. if they were, pride wouldn't be the wall barrier between the two of you and you wouldn't be asking this question.

cerridwen Established Member

cerridwen

Posted
Posted

It's a fine line between pride and self-respect.

 

I could rationalize contacting my verbally abusive ex by calling it pride--and deciding it's immature.

 

Or, I could stand firm in NOT contacting him by recognizing that I'm exercising some self-respect.

 

Were you dumped fun2bewith?

Rose T Established Member

Rose T

Posted
Posted
because it's all you have.

 

never underestimate your pride. it shields hurt and pain from penetrating/spreading out further. it's another way your body telling you that the person is not right for you. if they were, pride wouldn't be the wall barrier between the two of you and you wouldn't be asking this question.

 

 

This is so true. It really has been my best friend throughout the breakup - the only thing that enabled me to keep NC: the awareness that I deserve better treatment. It really is your last strength at times: that unimagined, essential ego that keeps you plodding forward and looking after yourself. One day, it will help you even to laugh about your breakup. Amazing stuff.

  • Author
fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

Posted
  • Author
Posted
It's a fine line between pride and self-respect.

 

I could rationalize contacting my verbally abusive ex by calling it pride--and deciding it's immature.

 

Or, I could stand firm in NOT contacting him by recognizing that I'm exercising some self-respect.

 

Were you dumped fun2bewith?

 

No, I broke it off, because she cheated (in my eyes, cheated means I got dumped) and I went into NC and it is 3 Months now. (No attempt from her to contact me)

 

The funny thing is, that I understand her so well and can understand and rationalize why she did the things she did(she is young and had a sad past). I don't really want her back, I just want to be there for her and help her to be strong, but how to do without loosing my pride, self-respect, and looking like a pathetic person who tries to hard....

 

That is why I do not know what to do, I told her I will contact her after 3 months, and it is now... Don't know what to do....

  • Author
fun2bewith Established Member

fun2bewith

Posted
  • Author
Posted
because it's all you have.

 

never underestimate your pride. it shields hurt and pain from penetrating/spreading out further. it's another way your body telling you that the person is not right for you. if they were, pride wouldn't be the wall barrier between the two of you and you wouldn't be asking this question.

 

 

I really like the way you put this....

 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...