40 Fonzarelli Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I sometimes do but then I don't want them to get tired of me. Or is it just better to always allow some space. Like seeing each other every other day?
depplover_1980 Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I sometimes do but then I don't want them to get tired of me. Or is it just better to always allow some space. Like seeing each other every other day? Yes space it out or you will lose your own identity, which is the thing that attracted them to you in the first place.
Seamless74 Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I tend to hang on my own, but my favourite place is at my mans feet. thats honestly one of the sexiest things ive ever heard.. is that your own or did you steal it??
depplover_1980 Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 thats honestly one of the sexiest things ive ever heard.. is that your own or did you steal it?? My own but it will be changing as he ended it tonight, which is very odd but I shall be ok in a couple of weeks. Glad it made you smile.
OceanGirl Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I do want to be in every day contact but seeing them every day would make me neglect other work and family responsibilities.
alphamale Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I sometimes do but then I don't want them to get tired of me. Or is it just better to always allow some space. Like seeing each other every other day? about 3x per week is good for me
Jannah Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 Two days per week is reasonable. Sometimes it will be more during the week, sometimes less. When you live together, that's when you get to see each other pretty much every day.
zengirl Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I still want some "me" time, but I'm always happy to see my BF. I would think we'd get sick of each other after every day, unless it was living together (that'd be seeing each other every day, but we'd still get to have our own lives, hobbies, etc, with it). Quality time every day would be too exhausting for me.
make me believe Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 Keeping a bit of space and time for just yourself is important, both at the beginning of the relationship and as it gets more serious. In the beginning of a relationship/dating, I might be super giddy with excitement and WANT to see the guy everyday, but I don't allow myself to because I know I'll quickly crash & burn. Now I see my fiance everyday obviously because we live together, but we still have time for ourselves when we want it. You have to keep your own life, hobbies, friends, etc.
Stung Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I start a little slow, but if I really am digging someone and feel comfortable with them I do start wanting to see them every day or nearly every day; Quality Time is high on my preferences/needs. That didn't mean dropping my own life entirely, I still went to my regular classes/activities, I would still plan occasional nights out with the girls, I would still occasionally want a night just to be by myself, but it felt really organic to start spending most of our free time together and start sleeping over most nights.
Confusedalways Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I start a little slow, but if I really am digging someone and feel comfortable with them I do start wanting to see them every day or nearly every day; Quality Time is high on my preferences/needs. That didn't mean dropping my own life entirely, I still went to my regular classes/activities, I would still plan occasional nights out with the girls, I would still occasionally want a night just to be by myself, but it felt really organic to start spending most of our free time together and start sleeping over most nights. This is exactly how I feel, particularly about how organic it feels to spend a lot of time together. I think you need to integrate them into your life. "Me" time will always be welcome but I like spending lots of time with my SO
Eeyore79 Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 I love my bf and would like to see him every day in a living-together sense. The thing is, dating and seeing each other every day isn't the same as living together and seeing each other every day. I think the amount of time a couple spend together is excessive if they date every day; you actually spend less time together every day when you live together. When you're dating, you specifically intend to spend time together when you meet up, so if you see each other every day you'll end up spending all your time together, for hours on end every single day. If you're living together and see each other every day, you might see each other for an hour while you eat dinner, then he goes to the gym, or you go out with your friends, and you spend another half an hour together while you get ready for bed. So you actually end up seeing each other more (too much!) if you date every day than you would if you lived together and both came and went as normal.
Feelin Frisky Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 To answer the OP, depends. I can think of one relationship I had where I wanted to see her every day. But "seeing" her didn't necessarily mean "having" her. We worked together and she actually commuted to work on the same train as me only she would get on my train at the big halfway changeover point. Every day I hoped she's be there. And every time she was we would sneak some heavy making out in our seats without being a spectacle to anyone. We wanted to see each other every chance we had--sneaking into the locker room during the day for some hot kissing, stealing some moments on the plaza. We kissed like it was the last we'd every see. All this ended about three days after we got an apartment together. Word to the wise people. Word to the wise.
carhill Posted January 19, 2011 Posted January 19, 2011 As a young man, yes, I did feel overwhelming desire to drown in infatuation and love. As an older man, I prefer balance. It makes those times together sweeter and more valuable. Part is the alone time and 'missing' someone and part is truly appreciating that, even though distant physically, a woman who is close to my heart and I hers comes back to me and I her, with memories of each other being the continuity of our bond.
beauty1 Posted January 21, 2011 Posted January 21, 2011 As a young man, yes, I did feel overwhelming desire to drown in infatuation and love. As an older man, I prefer balance. It makes those times together sweeter and more valuable. Part is the alone time and 'missing' someone and part is truly appreciating that, even though distant physically, a woman who is close to my heart and I hers comes back to me and I her, with memories of each other being the continuity of our bond. well said! i love this, it reminds me of my current situation. my new bf and i are only a month deep but i live 100 + miles away. this is hard, mostly physically, but i will move back soon and i keep reminding myself we wont have this forever. soon enough we will be together everyday...
Stung Posted January 21, 2011 Posted January 21, 2011 To answer the OP, depends. I can think of one relationship I had where I wanted to see her every day. But "seeing" her didn't necessarily mean "having" her. We worked together and she actually commuted to work on the same train as me only she would get on my train at the big halfway changeover point. Every day I hoped she's be there. And every time she was we would sneak some heavy making out in our seats without being a spectacle to anyone. We wanted to see each other every chance we had--sneaking into the locker room during the day for some hot kissing, stealing some moments on the plaza. We kissed like it was the last we'd every see. All this ended about three days after we got an apartment together. Word to the wise people. Word to the wise. Sorry that ended that way for you. I have of course experienced hot relationships snuffing out like a pinched candle, myself. Pheromones cannot trump an incompatible reality. On the other hand, my relationship flamed that hot and bright in the beginning, and is still banked and burning steadily after living together for several years, marriage, kids. As you said, it depends.
Billy_Boy Posted January 21, 2011 Posted January 21, 2011 I like spending a lot of my time with her, but now and then, I need to be alone to think and process recent events, ah the life of an INFJ introvert.
depplover_1980 Posted January 21, 2011 Posted January 21, 2011 Imagine eating your favourite dessert everyday? It would not be your favourite after a month of eating it so often, so taking a break from it is good and allows it to still taste delicious!!
Tarah Posted January 21, 2011 Posted January 21, 2011 No, seeing each other every day is a bit much, though it probably depends on how long it is. An hour every day is a bit different to 8 hours every day. All I know is that I need a bit of 'me' time away from my boyfriend, even though I only see him every other month.
radiodarcy Posted January 21, 2011 Posted January 21, 2011 no - - because i probably wouldn't like them anymore anticipation is always good. it keeps things fresh.
Recommended Posts