funinTibet Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 I live in a locality where everybody is married, but the husband/wife is working in a distant foreign country. I wonder what life will be like when the spouse retires and comes back for good. Will there be strife? Any adjustment problems? What is your take on such a situation?
aerogurl87 Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 I honestly don't see how one could be married and living away from their partner in a different country. Taking frequent business trips away from home, yes. But actually living in another country than one's spouse, well to me that seems a bit counterproductive to one of the main reasons of getting married which is to live and build a life together. I'm sure once the partner came back for good there would be alot of adjusting that needed to be done. But honestly, unless my partner were moving to another country and then having me join him shortly after (weeks or a few months) then I don't see such an arrangement working in terms of marriage.
HeavenOrHell Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 I agree with aerogurl. What is the reasons for getting married if you're hardly even going to see each other? Marriage can surely only work if you spend lots of time together and build a life together.
Eeyore79 Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 I can see how a long distance relationship might work for some people, but not a long distance marriage. I suppose it depends on how long the couple are separated for; if one is working away for a few months then it would be ok, but it sounds like you're talking about a permanent arrangement. A couple cannot build a solid marriage if they never see each other.
HeavenOrHell Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 Neither a r/ship or marriage will work unless the couple will be together long term eventually, the distance needs to be temporary, it can't be long distance indefinitely. I have heard the occasional story about couples always living long distance, but they are rare. I can see how a long distance relationship might work for some people, but not a long distance marriage. I suppose it depends on how long the couple are separated for; if one is working away for a few months then it would be ok, but it sounds like you're talking about a permanent arrangement. A couple cannot build a solid marriage if they never see each other.
LittleTiger Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 Men who are in the forces and workers on oil rigs (for eg) are often married and spend long periods of time away from home. I have no experience of living like that long term within a marriage but I assume some of them manage to make it work.
folieadeux Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 I have zero experience with this but don't think I could make this work...in a relationship or marriage. The point is to eventually be together. If there's no end in sight, I fail to see the point in being together.
aerogurl87 Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 Men who are in the forces and workers on oil rigs (for eg) are often married and spend long periods of time away from home. I have no experience of living like that long term within a marriage but I assume some of them manage to make it work. Yes that's true. How the spouses of those people do it, I don't know. So kudos to them for making it work because I'm way too high maintenance when it comes to needing to spend time with my SO to go through that.
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