SouthernSunshine Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 (edited) Had what was supposed to be a fling with a guy this past summer, then it got heavy... then he dropped out on me. I'm left wondering if I did something wrong, then slowly move on with my life. A few weeks later, casanova comes back into my life sending flowers, and buying gifts. I asked him why he left with no explanation, just dropped out on me. He said that wasn't his normal behavior, and that work got so busy, and he got scared. He then tells me he's not scared anymore, and that will never happen again. Well I think it's kinda funny how he only vanishes when I want him. When I don't want him, he's all over me, then when I develop feelings for him, he drops all contact then later comes back with the excuse that he lost his phone. He plays with me, but I don't know if he's being malicious or if he's actually scared. One minute he's in my life like white on rice with me, then next thing I know he's gone like it never happened. Granted we got into an argument this last time because he told me he was going to see me then he "had to work" then he turned the tables by acting like it was my fault. He shifts the blame alot. Then I'm left feeling like I ran him off. Then he comes back in my life, and acts like nothing ever happened. Total mind f***. Either I'm dealing with an emotional rollercoaster, or I'm getting played like a fiddle. Something tells me number two would be correct. It's just a sexual relationship, but HE talks about love, and HE says I don't care about him. WTF?! How is it that I don't care about him if I'm wanting to spend time with him? This time should I stick with NC when he reappears with the smoke & mirrors act he's so good at? Edited January 18, 2011 by SouthernSunshine
WTRanger Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 Dear God, leave him be. I dealt with the push and pull deal with this girl for 2 years. The tactic they use is extremely powerful, as you said, it makes you feel like you did something wrong. You aren't. It's just that these people are cowards, they run away from things. You question everything, then when they come back you apologize for something so small and random that you've beat to death in your head thinking that was the cause. They "forgive" you, things are normal, then Presto-Change-O they are gone again. He's not going to stop this. This is something he's been doing his entire life. There is a certain level of push/pull you must deal with in a person's life, but at some point it becomes unhealthy for you. You end up just being an enabler for that behavior of theirs. With these type of people it's always something. They get so wrapped up in their own life, they forget about the people they are supposed to care about. They won't change until they decide to. You can't wait around for that to happen.
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