brainygirl Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 This is to follow up a post I made a week or so ago. I was feeling very low about ever finding love. My unemployed brother is engaged. My ex-boyfriend who never seemed interested in a serious relationship is engaged. It seems like everyone I know who isn't me, is in love or engaged. That is not the topic of this post. This is my question, why would a man who dated me for six months, treated me like I was disposable the whole time, and got pissy when I told him I didn't want that sort of relationship anymore and if that's what he had to offer, I was out. Why would that man all of a sudden start PMing me on facebook?
paddington bear Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 Because he wants what he can't have. He wants you to want him, wants the attention, but if you give it to him he will behave the same way again.
Author brainygirl Posted January 16, 2011 Author Posted January 16, 2011 Because he wants what he can't have. He wants you to want him, wants the attention, but if you give it to him he will behave the same way again. He says he is engaged now. I don't have any interest in being involved with a taken man. It goes against every sense of decency I have. He had his chance, I put up with a lot from him and let him treat me in a way that I shouldn't have. I was the one who broke things off after he repeatedly told me he was not interested in anything more than a very casual relationship. Now he's engaged and is reaching out to me. I don't understand.
shayan Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 stop telling yourself you're cursed (it will become a life long self fulfilling property) and stop paying attention to the fact that you are not in a relationship (if that's what you focus on that's what you'll get), focus on enjoying life and doing activities that will put you in a place to meet new people. good luck.
paddington bear Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 He says he is engaged now. I don't have any interest in being involved with a taken man. It goes against every sense of decency I have. He had his chance, I put up with a lot from him and let him treat me in a way that I shouldn't have. I was the one who broke things off after he repeatedly told me he was not interested in anything more than a very casual relationship. Now he's engaged and is reaching out to me. I don't understand. Well don't engage (no pun intended) with him. He wants his cake and eat it. He wants to have you there as some buddy to talk to, when he has a damn fiancee. Let him talk to her. Next time he IM's you, just disengage! Just don't reply. Actions speak louder than words. Let him find some other idiot to fill whatever gap his fiancee doesn't, or to give him the thrill of feeling like he's doing something naughty now that he is a taken man. Lucky escape for you. Wonder if his financee knows he's been IM'ing his ex?
northern_sky Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 i think you need to move out of kansas. i feel like this is 90% of your problem
Author brainygirl Posted January 16, 2011 Author Posted January 16, 2011 i think you need to move out of kansas. i feel like this is 90% of your problem My teaching license is in Kansas and what extended family I have is here also. Besides, no matter where I live there would be asshats and weirdos.
Questionis Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 . Why would that man all of a sudden start PMing me on facebook? Cos he is desperate and he used you once before so he is trying to see if he can do it again.Block him! Er try and find a nice boy, dream about the things you and this nice biy will do together, learn how to materbate properly and you will never need to settl from crappy sex ever again
Titania22 Posted January 18, 2011 Posted January 18, 2011 Screw that guy, it's mind games, designed to stroke his own ego. Don't buy into it. There is nothing wrond with you. You are not cursed. Sometimes in life we run into people that are not worthy of our attention. Ignore the messages, don't even respond. You are worthy of so much more.
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