JustUnsure Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 I have been with my husband for 20 years, married 16 years. Over the last 3 months, things have not been right. I have always trusted him. In the past 3 months, I have been feeling I could not trust him. I repeated told him this. Last night I told him I wanted him to get VD tested. After telling him this, he told me, nothing went that far, he only made out with a couple of women, while with his friends. He tells me nothing else happen. I have built my life around him and my girls. It feels like every thiing is falling apart. I sit in the living room tearing up. What do I do???????????
fltc Posted January 17, 2011 Posted January 17, 2011 Get the STD tests, right away! It will ease your mind or confirm your suspicions but the most important thing is that some things need treatment right away! Do not wait.
kourtney01 Posted January 17, 2011 Posted January 17, 2011 Well it IS cheating. He's admitted to making out with other women And usually, what they admit to at first is only a small part of the story. So the question is, what does this mean to you? Is the making out okay as long as he doesn't sleep with someone else? Because IMO, you already have enough information to know he's disrespecting you and your M, he's having relations with other women, and there's a problem somewhere that needs to be ironed out. If it were me, I'd approach him with taking a lie detector test. Watch his expressions. Tell him since he's breached your trust by engaging with other women that you HAVE to know for certain that's all there is. See what happens. I have been in this situation and it's %100 correct. They will tell you as little as possible so that they can set your mind at ease and continue their behavior. Even if they don't want to continue this way, they will still admit to as little as possible and sugar-coat the situation so that they don't face the music by admitting the full truth. Kissing is still cheating and by accepting it, you're basically telling him that he can cheat as long as he doesn't have sex with other women.
Linda9999 Posted January 17, 2011 Posted January 17, 2011 What do you do? Well, what is HE doing? You can - pretend it isn't happening and let him continue - kick his ass out and divorce him - confront him and tell him it has to stop When I was confronted with a cheating spouse, I kicked his ass out. Ten months later, we are both working really hard on our marriage, and we've found each other again after years apart, even though we were living in the same house. But we would NOT be doing so if he hadn't stepped up to the plate, admitted his wrongs, and was trying very very hard to fix things.
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