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Asian Boyfriend has only dated Caucasian women....


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Posted

 

 

Over here, the Asian girls are usually shy, prude and conservative. Those are not my values. So I usually hang out with Caucasians. It's not that I exclude Asian girls beforehand. But really, among my peers, there are only a few Asian girls who go to parties.

 

Where exactly is here? From my understanding ( and being an Asian girl myself) we're only as conservative as the time we spend in school. I will only speak for myself, but I tend to priotize work and play separately. If I'm focused on school, I'm focused on school. If I want to play, I delegate partying to the weekends.

Posted

I am an asian guy and have dated black, asians, latinas, and caucasians. My preference is for caucasian women just because of their outlook on life is similar to mine, and longterm GFs have been caucasian. The asian women that I have dated seemed either hung up on money/materialistic things or plain psycho. I have sisters, and they are nuts. LOL.:D

Posted
I am an asian guy and have dated black, asians, latinas, and caucasians. My preference is for caucasian women just because of their outlook on life is similar to mine, and longterm GFs have been caucasian. The asian women that I have dated seemed either hung up on money/materialistic things or plain psycho. I have sisters, and they are nuts. LOL.:D

 

You forget that most asians have the long term dating--->>> marriage kind of mindset. At least most people that I know of tend to marry their first and only gf/bf.

Posted (edited)

nevermind... this is an older thead, I forgot I already posted the same thing... deleted...

Edited by fishtaco
Posted

Hey where's the love for Asian girls and women in this thread? Nearly everyone is discarding them as dating material. As a white guy I'm open to it. Haters gonna hate: http://bit.ly/iiLjfx

 

And oh yeah, I made another "wall of excellence", an Asian version this time, but this one has been compiled quick and dirty while tired from work and all off them are picked based only on looks, so on this one I didn't take personality and intelligence into account, sue me: http://bit.ly/hONqHO

 

Lucy Liu probably blows all of them out of the water though, but I didn't put her in there. She has a great personality, is intelligent and speaks beautifully English. There's something about Westernised Asian women who speak flawless English with a beautiful pronunciation or some of the European languages.

Posted

Just asked an Asian friend of mine if he was into Asian women. He said, no. So I showed him "the (Asian) wall of excellence" and asked: "So what about Asian chicks like that?"

 

He responded: "Even with Asian girls like that, it does me nothing."

 

He said: "We (Western) Asian guys will leave the Asian girls to you white guys, consider it a favor, but it's not a loss on our side."

 

WTF? Holy sh*t, it runs deep with some of you Asian guys, even in this thread hardly any Asian guy was positive. What's up with that? I'm sure not every (Western) Asian guy thinks like that, but I'm sensing a pattern here. Anyone care to explain?

Posted (edited)

yeah its kind of common to be honest.

 

im an asian girl and prior to my current guy i wasnt really into asians. i liked white guys :D but in time i got over it and realize they were just gonna be good friends to me or aka i put them in the friend zone (altho there are really some that are so ****ing hot). my bf also dated only white girls, but i think the main reason is..he isnt afraid to approach them and girls tend to reciprocate to those who show them attention. i did hesitate to be involved with him before cause i was thinking he isnt gonna be into me..cause im not white.

not to inflate anyones ego but tbh i think most men prefer white women/girls. u can see it ...tiger woods, or seal..

 

and as for the poster above me, not all asian guys act like your friend. maybe he got turned down way too many times he developed a hatred.

 

also i wouldnt be happy dating someone who seems to be some kind of a fetishist. that just does not seem right.

 

Oh yeah, I totally agree with that. Typical Asian girls wouldn't surprise you by suddenly sitting on your lap, opening your zipper, putting a condom on your little friend and saying "I want you now". That is soooo sexy... can't imagine Asian girls doing that. Maybe westernized Asian girls. The only ones I met who were that liberal were from California.

 

i think im way hornier than my bf and i was the one who made all the moves while he just lay there :)

 

i notice a lot of asian men in this thread, or even asian men in general, have some sort of angst or hidden hate/bitterness. time to get over it. girls have been burned before but you dont see us putting stuff here like "i'll only date white men, asian men just dont cut it for me"

Edited by sniffys
Posted
Just asked an Asian friend of mine if he was into Asian women. He said, no. So I showed him "the (Asian) wall of excellence" and asked: "So what about Asian chicks like that?"

 

He responded: "Even with Asian girls like that, it does me nothing."

 

He said: "We (Western) Asian guys will leave the Asian girls to you white guys, consider it a favor, but it's not a loss on our side."

 

WTF? Holy sh*t, it runs deep with some of you Asian guys, even in this thread hardly any Asian guy was positive. What's up with that? I'm sure not every (Western) Asian guy thinks like that, but I'm sensing a pattern here. Anyone care to explain?

 

I believe my experience is fairly common amongst Asian men. During my early days of dating, I ran into a lot of Asian women that specifically do not date Asian men. Some of them will even talk down about Asian men, wouldn't get caught dead with one... etc. As you've seen in this thread, some of the Asian women posters, while they don't have an attitude about it, simply don't date Asian men. So it's very real.

 

After awhile, I felt like I was barking up the wrong tree if I hit on Asian women. So I did what made sense - I stopped going after Asian women.

 

For me after dating various different non-Asian ethnicities, I found out I like Latinas the best. But that's just my personal preference.

 

Although in my 30's I started to see Asian women that do seem to be interested in Asian men. So I don't know if it's just a phase that Asian women go through, or because I've met more people now, and I'm seeing a statistical correction.

 

So maybe in the future I may end up dating an Asian woman, I don't know. But right now, I'm unsurprisingly getting pretty serious with a Mexican woman.

 

And really, like your friend said, it's kind of good for everyone. White guys like Asian girls. Asian girls like white guys. As long as I get my Latinas, it doesn't bother me one bit. So please, by all means, go for it.

Posted

It's actually more common than you think.

 

Plenty of people date outside of their race. Black men date white women, Asian men date white women, white men date black or Asian women, etc.

  • Author
Posted

I have never been attracted to an Asian guy before my current bf. I actually had said to people I would never date an Asian guy, but now I'm def eating my words!

 

I have dated white men my whole life and have never been treated as great as my Asian bf treats me.

Posted
Did you know that recently a Chinese pop singer died from a plastic surgery in her attempt to totally alter her face to be more Caucasian?

 

In Asia, its the dream of everybody to look white.

 

And as someone who grew up in Asia, I also like Caucasian women more over other races due to my upbringing.

 

Why is that? There are different kinds of beauty. Chinese people should be proud of the beauty they have, same as every other ethnic group of people should be proud of their beauty. I'm a redhead, and even though yeah sometimes I wish I wasn't :p due to some people not liking redheads it seems, I do acknowledge and am proud of the different kind of beauty I have, yet I absolutely adore the beauty of people with black hair and brown eyes and dark skin. I did go through a time where I thought I should dye my hair blonde, to look like my blonde friends, but then I realized how tragic that would be lol because I wouldn't be me anymore... I'd be a copy of another kind of beauty instead of being "true" to my own. :p

 

There is no ethnic group that is more beautiful than any other. There are just differences in beauty, but those differences are not superior or inferior. They are just... different, and different is good. :)

Posted
Hey where's the love for Asian girls and women in this thread? ... Lucy Liu probably blows all of them out of the water though, but I didn't put her in there.

 

I didn't say I would exclude them from the start, but the Asian girls I know are not my type in terms of character. But, speaking of celebrities: I'd totally do Maggie Q, for example. Not so much Lucy Liu, not my type.

 

He responded: "Even with Asian girls like that, it does me nothing."

 

And for me this really isn't about Asian women, it's just a subcategory of a bigger one: I don't like princesses, non-naughty women and "cute girls". There's one Asian girl on your wall of excellence who looks "cute" – I don't find that type attractive at all.

 

And a lot of men prefer "cute little girls", probably because they look so fragile, submissive, with big eyes etc. Someone who looks as if they won't scratch their ego. And the typical Asian girl fits into that category. That's the type of Asian girl I avoid... but not because they're Asian, but because they look cute. I also don't find cute Caucasian girls attractive. I like strong, confident, assertive women.

Posted
Why is that? There are different kinds of beauty. Chinese people should be proud of the beauty they have, same as every other ethnic group of people should be proud of their beauty. ...

 

There is no ethnic group that is more beautiful than any other. There are just differences in beauty, but those differences are not superior or inferior. They are just... different, and different is good. :)

 

i think a lot of it has to do with the globalisation of western "beauty," or, this sort of standardisation of the western aesthetic. by that i mean a combination of things: english as a lingua franca; european fashion being sold in asia; hollywood films (of course with the predominance of white lead actors); many of the world's leading financial and academic institutions being in white, english speaking countries. stir it all together into the same pot, and you kinda get this idea that being white and comanding a native level of english is something to aspire to. there is a flip side to all this though; there are lots out there who reject the western aesthetic and who also recognise that beauty is closer to home. i've come across people on both sides of this coin.

Posted
I've dated every race except Asian...

 

Why? Probably because you don't see a lot of Asians in Hokie land (VA)?

 

For me, I love Asian woman. But I live in California so why stick to only one flavor when you can have so many different flavors to choose from:)

Posted (edited)
I have never been attracted to an Asian guy before my current bf. I actually had said to people I would never date an Asian guy, but now I'm def eating my words!

 

I have dated white men my whole life and have never been treated as great as my Asian bf treats me.

 

I actually heard this from one of my best friend (White) who dates Korean women that he's treated better as oppose to when he was dating white woman. We just might be nicer:)

 

Fishtaco brought up a interesting though, it may a phase that Asians go through (dating Non Asians)? In my younger days, I preferred dating non Asian women. But as I'm started to think about starting a family and being more serious, I'm now looking at Asian women more.

 

So you may have to have the "talk" with your bf blonde about where your relationship is going???

Edited by mtber75
typo
  • Author
Posted
I actually heard this from one of my best friend (White) who dates Korean women that he's treated better as oppose to when he was dating white woman. We just might be nicer:)

 

Fishtaco brought up a interesting though, it may a phase that Asians go through (dating Non Asians)? In my younger days, I preferred dating non Asian women. But as I'm started to think about starting a family and being more serious, I'm now looking at Asian women more.

 

So you may have to have the "talk" with your bf blonde about where your relationship is going???

 

We are moving in together next month. My boyfriend is 34 so he wants to settle down. I'm happy with that!

Posted

tbh the white guy friends i have treat me better than the other ones. go figure.

Posted (edited)
yeah its kind of common to be honest.

i think im way hornier than my bf and i was the one who made all the moves while he just lay there :)

 

:p

I think it's a matter of comfortableness. I wouldn't have done that kind of initiative with my exes but I'd do it to my current bf, fyi he's Asian. :) I'm not quite sure if we are westernized but we do preserve some of our traditional (or rather, conservative) values, or being 'disobedient' to our parents by doing stuff behind their backs because they couldn't accept such 'westernized thinking'.

 

It's more about cultural acceptance. There's this girl who's moved to the states years ago, ended up being alone for a few months during the beginning of school, then clicked with a few Asians and I've never seen them hanging out with anyone who's not of the same skin colour. She's pretty open - partying, endless shopping, unafraid of revealing part of her booty - more confident and prettier (in the sense of, trendier) now that she's already there for years, but she's only dated Asians, and her clique is sort of the same old people I've been seeing on her fb, yeap, zero Caucasians. Perhaps they are the kind of people who wouldn't let go of their Chinese side despite being able to embrace the western culture, because I've seen her communicating with some of her Asian-American friends in Chinese, not a single English word...

 

Being in a multiracial country means I've seen quite a few combo; most of us here may prefer to date someone from our own race, sometimes it's minor stereotyping or racism, but some of us - even the ones who stereotype - would go for it even if he's from another race. Another thing is the religion matter, but I'd like to assume that OP's bf doesn't have that issue with people of his own race. The typical preference over here is dating within the same race because they find themselves similar.

 

One case though, hitting it off with someone of a different, idolized ethnic (fair Asians eg. Japanese, Korean who have distinctive features; Caucasian; Hispanic) earns you admiration and respect, I think it's pretty common elsewhere; for example some people would try to hit on an exchange student; yet that doesn't happen all the time because SOME of the exchange students are pretty shy people as well. Since they couldn't open up to us, I'd say it's quite unattractive.

 

The other phenomenon is Chinese looking down on people of their own race. It's like Filipinos being racist against Filipinos. They despise everything about Chinese - the language, the dialects, the culture, the traditions - while think highly of the Caucasians and trying to look like one as well. That includes hardcore partying too, to rebut to the aforementioned 'few Asian girls go to parties' statement. It's a different place over there, and another situation over here. I guess these are the ones who tend to choose Caucasians over Asians.

Edited by mumblingthots
Posted
stir it all together into the same pot, and you kinda get this idea that being white and comanding a native level of english is something to aspire to.

 

Yes, but you can't deny the fact that Western civilization left all others behind at the beginning of the 19th century. So one shouldn't be surprised at all that the West is regarded as the cultural benchmark.

 

The so-called "tradition" Asian conservatives are praising nowadays is an Asia that has been modernized according to Western ideas. I doubt Asian women in the US would love to have their feet bound.

 

This is not really about Asian men dating only Caucasian women, but about modern men dating modern women.

Posted

I grew up where asians were the majority since the 80's.

 

You guys are just learnin'...... little children ;) You will see what we found out 20+ years ago.

 

A) Happas are cute. And have really nice lives because they're so gosh darn attractive.

B) The guys who tend to fall into the "look the same" category date other asian girls who "look the same". The one oddball who's 6'2" and fits in with the fratties dates the non asians. Same goes for the chicks. Same goes for latinos. Same goes for Blacks. Same goes for Whites. Some look the same. Some look very unique. The more unique ones become the "hottest" of the bunch, and must find another "hottest" from the bunch. But being that it's hard for the "hottest" or most unique asian guy to find the hottest or most unique asian girl, due to simple population reasons, they must stray outside.

 

C) We get bored of asian girls not wanting to go eat sushi or asian food with us. We end up eating and feeling like we're our parents. And also, two asians being together in America of the post 2000's kinda has a strange effect on us-- We begin reverting to becoming all education/conservative in nature. And yet, we spent the last 20 years trying to be as bad/mean/hip/cool as possible.

 

D) None admit but, it sure does boost your social value. Admit it.

 

E) They kinda remind us of our sisters.

 

F) We actually do have some "nerdy" quirks. We been waiting for the phase to pass of anti nerd backlash, but we knew once our nerdness grew up and made 90k a year they'd come back. And now comes phase two... oh, so NOW you want us back eh?? hehehe... payback is a b***ch. ;)

 

 

G) We know that despite 90k a year, latinos are still much better looking ;P

 

H) We still can't dance

 

I) Who f---ing cares?? Times change.

Posted

Well here's the perspective and speculation from one Asian male in his mid-20's who grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood on the east coast US and had little contact with Asians in general. This is not meant to reflect the general Asian population, but only those who I've had contact with.

 

The one thing I've observed from a majority of the westernized Asian women I've seen or talked to is that they seem to give off an air of superiority over their male counterparts and the attitude that they are "too good" to date an Asian man. This can be attributed to several things. First, westernized Asians often have the mindset of completel assimmilation, and dating a white man is the means to that end. Perhaps dating an Asian man would be detrimental to becoming completely "American" and maintaining a high social status.

 

It's also possible that these women have a sense of self-loathing and don't want to see themselves with someone of their own "kind." By dating non-Asian, they will feel less "inferior" to other women.

 

It may also be a simple issue of attraction. Many Asian women, as seen in this very thread, say that they simply aren't attracted to Asian men. This can be attributed to the stereotypes surrounding Asian men which Asian women will liberally apply across the board, causing them to assume that every Asian man is [insert characteristics of stereotype here]. Therefore, they just avoid them altogether. For example, I've been told several times that I'm "cute for an Asian"... :confused::rolleyes:

 

Am I offended? Not at all. These women can be attracted to and want whoever they want, and it's no hair off my back. Although I don't particularly care for some of the attitudes I've noticed in a lot of Asian women, I don't think less of them. You want what you want. I'll do my thing and you do yours.

Posted
Am I offended? Not at all. These women can be attracted to and want whoever they want, and it's no hair off my back. Although I don't particularly care for some of the attitudes I've noticed in a lot of Asian women, I don't think less of them. You want what you want. I'll do my thing and you do yours.

 

I think this here is key.

 

Most of the Asian men that I know in real life that also do not date Asian women are like this. They don't particularly "do not" date Asian women, but it's more like they've noticed Asian women "do not" date Asian men, for whatever reason. Maybe simple preferences, maybe stereotypes, whatever it is, that is a very real fact.

 

So we just shrug and go date non Asians. It's really not that big of a deal. Like USMCHokie said, I'll do my thing and you do yours. As long as everyone is happy, then it's win across the board.

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