Lockdown Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 I met someone online in a video game a little over 3 months ago. I never considered in a million years that I would feel this way about someone online, or that real emotions could surface during a simple interaction just as chatting, but this person completely changed my mind. I have fallen for her, and she has fallen for me. We spend time taking pictures and sending them to each other, and we spend a lot of time in the game chatting, but lately, I have not enjoyed the game, and she still loves playing it. I live in NY, she lives in Venuzuela. We plan on meeting soon, getting an apartment together and being with one another, but sometimes I have my doubts. It is difficult for me. What makes it difficult, is that I have an addictive personality. When we sit and talk and I have her full attention, it is like a drug high. My heart starts pounding, I start trembling in my chair, I feel an adrenaline rush and an excitement like no other. But lately, she has been concentrating on the game, and I have not been the nicest person I would like to be. I have said hurtful things to her, things I don't mean, in an attempt to get her attention, so that I can feel that feeling again -- and I feel horrible in doing it. I am like a drug addict, and she is my drug. I am using her to escape from my own problems, and to escape from the difficulties of the long distance between us. I am very worried that this relationship will fail before it truly begins. I have told her everything about my life, the deepest parts of my soul. She knows everything about me, and I feel like I have messed up deeply by being so addicted. I am uncontrollable at times. She is very understanding and forgives me, but it drives a wedge between us, and I don't know how to get better, so that I don't ruin what I consider to be the best relationship of my life. I know we haven't met yet, but I can't help shake the feeling that she is truly the one for me, so loving, so kind. I have my doubts still, but...I really want this to work. Does anyone have any experience, or any relative advice for how to handle this situation so I don't mess this up? I really love this woman....I don't want to ruin it.
lala82 Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 I have the same experience as you. Five months ago I meet a guy online, who lives in another country. Honestly, when I start talking with him in msn I though it was just for a few days. However, we start talking every single day and call each other in skype. We felt that we were compatible in many things. We share many things about our lives and we fell in love. He is an amazing guy I cannot say anything bad about him. However, two weeks ago we had a bad argument, which I created. I feel bad about it. Since, then I do not know anything about him and I miss him a lot. I hope we can solve things one day I do not want to loose him. If you have strong feelings for this girl, do not be scare just enjoy what you are feeling for her. You have to be confident and optimistic that things will be ok with her. I think you should visit her in Venezuela and see how thinks are between both of you. Maybe she is the right person, but if she is not the right person at least you will not doubt anymore.
folieadeux Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Meet each other first and then worry about all of these other things like getting an apartment together, etc. In the meantime, work on yourself. Being in a relationship with someone isn't supposed to be about escaping from your problems.
creighton0123 Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Have I ever had that experience? Every time I talk to boyfriend, but his lacking response usually results in me taking my clothes off moreso than being mean. "We plan on meeting soon, getting an apartment together and being with one another, but sometimes I have my doubts. It is difficult for me." Perhaps you should plan on meeting first - then worry about where to go from there. You may find that in person attraction differs greatly. The game also may serve as a crutch in the relationship. If both of you were to suddenly quit the game, would you still communicate as often? Having played WoW for years, I saw a number of couples who met in-game only to end up falling apart when one person decided to scale back or quit playing all together (typically for personal reasons).
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