brneyedgrl Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 If you had a suspicion that your ex of 6 years who just broke up with you a week and a half ago was seeing someone else and possibly cheated on you with her and you're still lviing together for the time being, would you want to know the truth? Or do you think you'd be better off mentally not knowing everything?
Rose T Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 I would want to know. While it might not help your healing to get too many details, this is potentially a HUGE factor in your break up and clarification will help you get your head round everything that has happened. It might also take a weight off your mind, in a strange way - if you find out you were with a cheater, you should start to understand that the problem is his, not yours - that's no way to resolve a relationship. In the medium term, it might also help you to get him off that pedestal and realise his flaws. I just went through an unexpected break-up in which my ex suddenly flagged that he wanted out - I discovered there was another woman. That allowed me to take control, insist that he moved out and alleviate my fears that I had done something wrong. It's not easy to deal with, but it's important, IMHO.
Am4Real Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 If you had a suspicion that your ex of 6 years who just broke up with you a week and a half ago was seeing someone else and possibly cheated on you with her and you're still lviing together for the time being, would you want to know the truth? Or do you think you'd be better off mentally not knowing everything? Your human curiousity wants to know...that is normal...you do not need to ask us that. However, once you do know be prepared for a long time of misery because all you will do is replay the sexual acts between him and her over and over and over for much time to come. You will wonder if he was having sex with her and you in the same day, the same week, etc. It will be torture for you. I would not pursue the personal investigation any more. Deal with facts. The facts are the relationhip is over and he is seeing someone else. Leave it at that. Work on you; work on your hapiness and eventually it will come about in more ways than you can count. Good luck and best wishes, Am4Real
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