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What's a "GOOD" time frame???


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Posted

I've been seeing this great guy

idk if anyone has read my previoius threads but ya'll should:)

 

so this guy i'll call Mr. Big, i've been seeing him for about four months

 

when is a good time for him to meet my 4yr old son???

 

we've talked about it he says his only concern is that my son wont like him...he's older than me he doesnt have any kids of his own and no kids that he's ever around to be able to practice or be seen as a ''father-figure''

 

SO I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO GO ABOUT INTRODUCING THEM!?!?

 

I need suggestions, has anyone been in a similiar situation, etc.

thanks, LadyD06

Posted

I wouldn't let him meet your son at all unless you were both 100% committed to a LTR and have discussed marriage and the whole works. And then I'd wait a bit longer just because.

Posted
I wouldn't let him meet your son at all unless you were both 100% committed to a LTR and have discussed marriage and the whole works. And then I'd wait a bit longer just because.

 

I think expecting single mothers to wait until their new boyfriend only starts discussing marriage is too extreme. Mother with kids is a 'package deal', and I would not be taking part seriously in any talk of marriage with never having any interaction with her children. The guy's not experiencing the 'whole works' as regards her life, so I don't expect him to have the 'whole works' conversation.

 

I think you should introduce them on neutral territory. Say at a sporting event, or at the park if you normally go their with your kids, or for coffee & some shopping togther on a saturday morning. Preferably something informal, rather than say at a restaurant for dinner.

Posted

OP, I just finished posting a reply to this in your other thread in the Parenting section.

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Posted

yes thank you Stung i appreciate it

 

~and i think he needs to meet him, my only concern is that they wont get along. or that they will and me and the guy wont end up making it in the long run....

 

thanks for everyone's advice

Posted

I've never understood the big waiting period myself.I was a divorced single mom who had LOTS of friends; Half of them male. I also ran a theatre troupe and we would often rehearse at my home.

 

So basically, my daughter met and knew lots of "male humans" who were ALL introduced as my friends. When I was dating she met them the same way she would meet friend "Bob" or " Joe". She never knew the difference BUT I was then able to ascertain whether they liked her and vice versa.

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