Whatshername Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Long story, it's in another post. No one replied and I don't blame them. Bottom line. 4.5 years in a LDR and never a sign of any sexual unhappiness, or reason for not trusting him. Out of the blue his ex gf(more FWB) appears, asking a favor. he does, then she lures him with sexting, and he is tempted. Nothing happens, but they had dinner and kissed each time. I actually spoke to the other woman, as I was very naive about things, whihc made him angry at me, bc I called at work (I had no idea it was her work #). Well, he asked me to leave. I went to him, and we talked. He apologized for the texting and that is when I found out it was sexual and that they had been out twice. It hurt. I was reeling. This man is the epitomy of integrity. he even goes the speed limit! (sorry, trying to find a bit of humor this morning). At first we were good, had hugged and kissed, walked, ate dinner, but then the truth came out and he got weird. Like he was mad at me for dragging it out of him. He should have been telling ME. It seemed like his ego was bursting and here I was heartbroken! He refused to apologize and I ended up leaving. I know that I cannot make him apologize, that is moot. I am however willing to forgive him if he does. The problem is, that even if he is sorry, I think his pride will keep him from admitting it. This is why I ask the q. I am hurting badly, and it's been a week. I sent a voicemail, short and sweet, telling him how hard this is, and that my love is big enough to forgive him if he asked me to, and that to give up what we have, and our future together seems wrong. I forget what else, but it was very simple, but let him know that I am not too angry to forgive him and move on. Ok, let me have it. Let him go he's a douchebag for cheating I'm a doormat More fish in the sea sigh My alarm went off this am, and of ALL the songs..........was "It ain't over til it's over.....".. Made me laugh. Hey God, are you making fun of me? Am I making afool out of myself, again?
Am4Real Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Ask him straight why he is not over his EX and what feelings he has. If he honestly tells you there is something there then perhaps he can divulge what it is and you work it out through solid communication. If on the other hand he tell you he is over his EX, which obvious to this poster "how can that be if text, dinner and kissing" are evidence of such, I'd dump him in heartbeat because you're only discovering the surface of the lies to come. Good luck!
PegNosePete Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Nothing happens, but they had dinner and kissed each time. Uhh, is this some new definition of "nothing happened" that I am not aware of? Because kissing is definitely something. He apologized for the texting and that is when I found out it was sexual and that they had been out twice. So they had sex too then. Guaranteed. Did he tell you that part yet? He seems to be the typical deny it until his death-bed type. Let him go he's a douchebag for cheating Yep, that's the one. He is not sorry for his actions, he can't even talk to you about them or admit what he did. Even if he says he is sorry, he is only sorry for getting caught. He shows no remorse whatsoever. If you take him back, you are just telling him that he can treat you as badly as he likes and you'll still come back for more. He will cheat again and again and you'll take him back every time. You need to have some self-respect and ditch his cheating ass.
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