Aisha4457 Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 So here is my story http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t260382/ Me and my ex have had limited contact since we broke up December 18th. Initially when we broke up it was no contact either side. He broke this by coming to check up on me to see if I was okay and to reaffirm there was no chance of reconciliation. He told me he misses me and he has cried for me since I have been gone. So when he went again there was no contact for another week or so. Next thing I know he comes online ranting and raving because my so called "friends" had been pestering him. I asked him to block and delete them but he refused (He is a stubborn poo, to put it politely) So eventually he blamed me for it an supposedly "blocked and deleted" me never to have contact again. Another week or something passes and my friend tells me to "forget about the maggot, he is already eyeing up other girls" I then get a message from him saying, honestly don't believe your friend, I haven't been doing anything of the sort I simply stated that if I had been it was no longer your business. (I knew this anyway) Anyway an argument happened and some hurtful things where said. When a guy would not stop harrassing me for sex, my ex intervened and politely told him to back off or there would be consequences. When the guy said are you jelous, my ex gave a vague answer of Jelous of what? He always says he would obviously be jelous if someone else had me but he would be happy for me if they made me happy. The guy then proceeded to insult me directly, my ex saw red and went crazy at him. Resulting in the guy leaving me alone after a profuse apology. He said that It's not that he doesn't love me or didn't love me, it's just the situation as it was, wasn't working for him. He won't tell me if he is over me or not and does say he misses what we had but is so angry at the moment, through friends interfering, causing a rift between us, ultimately causing arguments between us. I told him to go away, leave me alone if I don't mean anything anymore, he refused saying give him time to calm down and he will come to me. Anyway today a friend (use that term loosely) contacted him and asked "If you are so sure you don't want to be with her, why do you stick around" To which his response was "I don't know" She then asked "Do you still love her" To which he responded "Will people just leave it alone, it's between me and her!" My "Friend" went behind my back and did this so when I found out I said to my ex block and remove her and I apologise on her behalf as she is making me look like an idiot, and if I had it my way they would not be contacting you. He said that's fine don't feel you have to apologise, you're not the one doing it. Conversation moved on to my dog (who is due to be put to sleep very soon) He seemed awkward in comforting me so I said "It's fine, why should you have to worry" To which his response was "hmmm" I goes "Well it's not like you need to be there for me anymore" to which his response was "Maybe". He says that he doesn't want to be with me again and feels he made the right choice but I don't know whether if this is out of hurt and anger he is saying it, as tbh we have done nothing but argue since we broke up so why should he think otherwise!? I don't want to argue though. My ex is quite a moody guy, when something annoys him he will stay annoyed for a while. It's quite clear he doesn't want me out of his life completely (Well im 99% sure) but he is very angry and hurt at the moment and needs time to chill out, which I completely understand. But is he sticking around to be friends or is it something else, I'm so confused I don't want to wait forever but if there is a chance I would like to go for it. Things definitely need to be worked on and I already know what I need to do in order to become a better person and better girlfriend. Would no contact make him realise what he really wants?
january2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 As far as I can tell, nothing has changed since your other thread from two days ago. I'm sorry you're hurting but I suggest taking the advice given to you that thread. That is, go full NC (delete and block).
SDA Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 I wish I could give you a more straight forward reply because my ex is currently giving veryyyyy mixed signals. He said he needed time to chill out so the best thing you could do is give him that time to relax and settle down to have him decide what is best for him. Tell him to contact you when he is 100% sure what he wants to do. Good luck Aisha
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