Girlygirl1977 Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 (edited) I met a guy at my friend's bday party last mon and we got along well. He kept saying I shouldn't leave and then wanted my contact. He put his arm around me. The next day he contacted me and told me he found me very interesting and wanted to meet. He also added me on facebook (I took 2 days to accept bc I often don't do that when I'm about to go out with someone). We met monday (he had offered two date ideas - 1) a free movie screening and 2) was to get drinks or food. My schedule worked better for drinks/food. He is a screenwriter (well hoping to be so in mean time writes but does odd copywriting etc.) and has roommates (at 30) so I know he doesn't make that much. During the dinner he did touch me every so often but I'm a bit shy at first so I kind of keep to myself till I get more comfortable (and we weren't drinking at dinner too). It was about 2.5hrs. He picked the place and then when the check came, we split it. From there I think I kind of felt low bc I haven't had this happen but I didn't say anything and we left. We had to go back to place in freezing cold bc I thought I left my hat and in the end it wasn't there. He walked to help me get a cab and hugged me and said something about doing it again soon. I got home and found my hat and so wrote just saying I found it and sorry I kept him out in the cold. He sent a message back a couple mins after saying he is really glad we met up and that I'm very interesting and engaging (unlike most ppl from my school, our school are rivals). Now it would seem normal except for the split of the check. Would a guy do this if he is interested? What do you think of all this? Do men tell you, you are interesting and engaging after a date if they didn't like it? Edited January 13, 2011 by Girlygirl1977
mo mo Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Men are not like women If we say we like you and want to see you, it means we like you and want to see you.
oaks Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Now it would seem normal except for the split of the check. Would a guy do this if he is interested? What do you think of all this? Do men tell you, you are interesting and engaging after a date if they didn't like it? There's a current thread, I think it's called "Who pays?" talking about things like splitting checks. Take a look at that. It seems that with some people splitting the check is no big deal, for some people it's normal, and for some people it's a warning sign that there might not be a second date. I'd say try to think of splitting the cost of dating as being a modern grown-up way of doing things, but there are people here who will disagree! If he said you are interesting and engaging then either he means exactly that or at least he likes you enough to want to give you some sort of compliment that isn't lame like "you're hot". Take it as a compliment - and if you're interested in seeing him again then don't be shy about letting him know.
utterer of lies Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Now it would seem normal except for the split of the check. Would a guy do this if he is interested? What do you think of all this? Do men tell you, you are interesting and engaging after a date if they didn't like it? So he's poor and a cheap bastard (for not inviting you), but this doesn't mean he doesn't truly like you.
Kamille Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 In the town where I'm from, splitting the check used to be customary, at least in the 1990s. (I think expectations are changing nowadays, what with the emergence of Dating inc.) In your shoes, I wouldn't sweat this. You point out yourself that the guy likely doesn't have a high income. Relax and get to know him for him.
Sunkissedkate Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 It sounds like he does like you, and splittling the check... really not a big deal... when i first started seeing my bf i made them split the check, i dont like having someone else pay for my things. I am very independant that way, and thats also a way to keep it light until you know that he does really like you and would like to do it again more frequently. So its kinda like keeping things on a friends basis to get to know one another before you just jump into seeing him, bc you did just meet him at a friends bday party.
Author Girlygirl1977 Posted January 13, 2011 Author Posted January 13, 2011 Thank you for all your thoughts - this is all very helpful and opens my mind on how I view things a bit especially on the paying. I have to admit it was an instant negative reaction.
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