myhearthurtsbadly Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 i want you to know michael that i am so grateful for everything you have done for me over the past few months. Not only for not judging me through anything but for always sticking by me and for allowing me to like myself again. When i say I couldnt have done it without you, i mean every single word of that. You taught me to forget the silly things in life and concentrate on everything good in my life, you included. I know you dont always agree with my choices but you have always been supportive for me. I have hurt you so bad, and even through it, you have put me above yourself and when I am upset and need someone, I know I can always count on you. I love everything that you've brought to my life, and the experiences we have shared together. Sometimes i feel so lonely and my mind races back through all the horrible things in my life and it is the memory of you that keeps me back to present and allows me to see good again. I don't know if this even makes sense, I'm kind of just letting my hands right whatever comes into my mind. I wish we could rewind time and start things again, not in the same circumstance. I know how we met was exciting and a rush but I wish I got to know you properly before we rushed into things. I always think what my life would be like now without you in it and to be honest Michael I just can't. I think you are such a lovely person and honestly don't deserve anyting bad to come to you again. I know we have our arguements and our fallings out, but to be honest looking back, I think they were all made out to be bigger than they should have been, i guess thats down to the kind of people we are. Sometimes I can fast forward time and see us together, living together, starting a proper go at things. I'm lying here with Ollie and I know it sounds silly but I know he misses you aswell. Its crazy how attached you can get to people, when every day you walk past thosands. Is it fate that makes you stop and talk to certain people? I think it was fate that I met you when i did. I needed you in my life and I like to think you needed me aswell. I don't want to stop writing as I don't know how to end it. With love? With every bit of my heart? As your friend? best friend? Whatever happens between us, I just want to say thankyou for coming into my life Michael. X Right... Analysis!?
0hpenelope Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 WOOOW we get to analyze?! This penny's gonna get going, then. i want you to know michael that i am so grateful for everything you have done for me over the past few months. Not only for not judging me through anything but for always sticking by me and for allowing me to like myself again. When i say I couldnt have done it without you, i mean every single word of that. You taught me to forget the silly things in life and concentrate on everything good in my life, you included. "Oh Michael, thanks for being able to fulfill my needs, even though being cared for by you wasn't enough to make me stay :love:" I know you dont always agree with my choices but you have always been supportive for me. I have hurt you so bad, and even through it, you have put me above yourself and when I am upset and need someone, I know I can always count on you. I love everything that you've brought to my life, and the experiences we have shared together. Sometimes i feel so lonely and my mind races back through all the horrible things in my life and it is the memory of you that keeps me back to present and allows me to see good again. "Let me tell you more things that will show you how wishy washy I am and those experiences that were supposed to have made us stronger together still weren't strong enough to keep us united." I don't know if this even makes sense, I'm kind of just letting my hands right whatever comes into my mind. I wish we could rewind time and start things again, not in the same circumstance. I know how we met was exciting and a rush but I wish I got to know you properly before we rushed into things. I always think what my life would be like now without you in it and to be honest Michael I just can't. I think you are such a lovely person and honestly don't deserve anyting bad to come to you again. I know we have our arguements and our fallings out, but to be honest looking back, I think they were all made out to be bigger than they should have been, i guess thats down to the kind of people we are. Sometimes I can fast forward time and see us together, living together, starting a proper go at things. "I'm not going to outright say that I want a second chance, but would rather hint at it so that I can bolt again if I change my mind. All of these things I'm saying is probably me wanting another shot with you, but I don't know. We had our problems we could've resolved yet I chose to leave you anyway, but I don't know." I'm lying here with Ollie and I know it sounds silly but I know he misses you aswell. Its crazy how attached you can get to people, when every day you walk past thosands. Is it fate that makes you stop and talk to certain people? I think it was fate that I met you when i did. I needed you in my life and I like to think you needed me aswell. I don't want to stop writing as I don't know how to end it. With love? With every bit of my heart? As your friend? best friend? Whatever happens between us, I just want to say thankyou for coming into my life Michael. X "I started typing this text because I had no proper distraction (even Ollie wasn't a distraction), so now you're confused all over again! In summation, thanks for coming into my life, you have served your purpose and now I feel very good about sending you this self-serving, feel-good text message. I don't understand how this possibly might throw a wrench in your healing process, but thank you for reading this text. And I still didn't make myself clear about a second chance but I did mention that we can be friends...? Maybe? ;)" Analysis: Sweet to the ear, but too ambiguous. Proceed with caution. I looked at your past threads and you have a lot of history with this girl. If you don't want to be friends with her, don't go with that impulse of befriending her after receiving a message so... ah, unique. I have no words to describe this text. Overall, she just sent it to feel good about herself.
Ajax Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 I admit that I'm not familiar with your situation, but my initial thought is that she's using you as a safety net while she gets over you. If she wants you back she should just come out with it. Otherwise she needs to let you go.
hopesndreams Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 WOOOW we get to analyze?! This penny's gonna get going, then. "Oh Michael, thanks for being able to fulfill my needs, even though being cared for by you wasn't enough to make me stay :love:" "Let me tell you more things that will show you how wishy washy I am and those experiences that were supposed to have made us stronger together still weren't strong enough to keep us united. "I'm not going to outright say that I want a second chance, but would rather hint at it so that I can bolt again if I change my mind. All of these things I'm saying is probably me wanting another shot with you, but I don't know. We had our problems we could've resolved yet I chose to leave you anyway, but I don't know." "I started typing this text because I had no proper distraction (even Ollie wasn't a distraction), so now you're confused all over again! In summation, thanks for coming into my life, you have served your purpose and now I feel very good about sending you this self-serving, feel-good text message. I don't understand how this possibly might throw a wrench in your healing process, but thank you for reading this text. And I still didn't make myself clear about a second chance but I did mention that we can be friends...? Maybe? ;)" Analysis: Sweet to the ear, but too ambiguous. Proceed with caution. I looked at your past threads and you have a lot of history with this girl. If you don't want to be friends with her, don't go with that impulse of befriending her after receiving a message so... ah, unique. I have no words to describe this text. Overall, she just sent it to feel good about herself. Wow, perfect analysis. My ex sent so many of these types of emails to me and it was so difficult not to fall for them. If you don't respond, and I hope you don't, in a few months time or sooner, she will write more of this stuff. If she still doesn't get a response, she will send you a final, nasty email. The only thing that would have any meaning is if she knocked on your door. Words? Mean nothing.
Author myhearthurtsbadly Posted January 12, 2011 Author Posted January 12, 2011 WOOOW we get to analyze?! This penny's gonna get going, then. "Oh Michael, thanks for being able to fulfill my needs, even though being cared for by you wasn't enough to make me stay :love:" "Let me tell you more things that will show you how wishy washy I am and those experiences that were supposed to have made us stronger together still weren't strong enough to keep us united." "I'm not going to outright say that I want a second chance, but would rather hint at it so that I can bolt again if I change my mind. All of these things I'm saying is probably me wanting another shot with you, but I don't know. We had our problems we could've resolved yet I chose to leave you anyway, but I don't know." "I started typing this text because I had no proper distraction (even Ollie wasn't a distraction), so now you're confused all over again! In summation, thanks for coming into my life, you have served your purpose and now I feel very good about sending you this self-serving, feel-good text message. I don't understand how this possibly might throw a wrench in your healing process, but thank you for reading this text. And I still didn't make myself clear about a second chance but I did mention that we can be friends...? Maybe? ;)" Analysis: Sweet to the ear, but too ambiguous. Proceed with caution. I looked at your past threads and you have a lot of history with this girl. If you don't want to be friends with her, don't go with that impulse of befriending her after receiving a message so... ah, unique. I have no words to describe this text. Overall, she just sent it to feel good about herself. Thanks for the reply! Ollie is her cuddly toy!! LOL! Also thanks for reading my past posts, however... This is a different girl who i have been with for the past 6 months. So if you look at my posts within that time you can get a background to this. Ive got to say your analysis made me laugh out loud and i have to say that i completely agree. You obviously have a lot of experience!
0hpenelope Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 Thanks for the reply! Ollie is her cuddly toy!! LOL! Also thanks for reading my past posts, however... This is a different girl who i have been with for the past 6 months. So if you look at my posts within that time you can get a background to this. Ive got to say your analysis made me laugh out loud and i have to say that i completely agree. You obviously have a lot of experience! Aww, thanks! I think it's just because while people shouldn't be boxed into categories, it's not that complicated to figure out what they're about based on what they're saying and what they're not saying; how they're behaving, too. I try to give others the benefit of the doubt (like with my recent ex), but it usually hurts me because I blind myself to what's going on too. I freaking begged for my ex back twice when he broke up with me while knowing I shouldn't have done that and I should've just kept my cool. Oh well, NC will help with that eventually. I'm very close to being over him. I read Don's response to you. His explanation is very blunt but overall, I agree with what he's saying: she's using you as a crutch because no one else has come her way yet. The moment she finds a new guy, she'll kick you to the curb. Stay out of her way now, she's playing games: she wanted this break, she should have it and you're classy by giving it to her. If I got a similar text from my ex, I'd share it with my friends, have a good laugh, and delete it from my phone.
spiderowl Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 Lonely, sad, thinking of what could have been. Felt I ought to let you know you've been important to me, guilt about what's happened, this is an impulse and I might think differently tomorrow. You mean a lot and would like to be friends, could even see more sometimes, but not at all definite about this, it's in my lonely moments. Haven't thought if this will affect you badly in any way as I'm assuming you'll want to hear good things about yourself. Promising nothing, no need to get involved again, far too risky and tomorrow is always another day ...
suddendumpee Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 i want you to know michael that i am so grateful for everything you have done for me over the past few months. Not only for not judging me through anything but for always sticking by me and for allowing me to like myself again. When i say I couldnt have done it without you, i mean every single word of that. You taught me to forget the silly things in life and concentrate on everything good in my life, you included. Translation: I want you to know Michael that I am still selfish, therefore I am only going to talk about what you did for me, instead of what I want to do for you. You did not judge me back then, therfore I expect you to not judge me now either. You always stuck by me, so I expect this will continue even though I dumped you. I couldn't have done it without out YOU, but I care not weather I did anything to help you. You boosted my ego to the point to where I realized I didn't need you anymore. A**hole response: "I'm glad I taught you so much. Next time, if you are looking to learn something, try opening a book instead of your legs." I know you dont always agree with my choices but you have always been supportive for me. I have hurt you so bad, and even through it, you have put me above yourself and when I am upset and need someone, I know I can always count on you. I love everything that you've brought to my life, and the experiences we have shared together. Sometimes i feel so lonely and my mind races back through all the horrible things in my life and it is the memory of you that keeps me back to present and allows me to see good again. Translation: You don't always agree with me, but your history of being a pushover assures me that I can say these things to reel you back in. Even though I ripped out your heart and pi$$ed on it, I know you'll always be there for me. Right? I love the things you game me, and the experiences you brought me, but unfortunately not YOU. I am writing you because I am having a moment of loneliness since Ricardo is having a "guys night out" and I'm afraid he is cheating on me. When I fear the STD's he may be bringing home, I remember a time when I was with someone who actually gave a sh*t about me. I don't know if this even makes sense, I'm kind of just letting my hands right whatever comes into my mind. I wish we could rewind time and start things again, not in the same circumstance. I know how we met was exciting and a rush but I wish I got to know you properly before we rushed into things. I always think what my life would be like now without you in it and to be honest Michael I just can't. I think you are such a lovely person and honestly don't deserve anyting bad to come to you again. I know we have our arguements and our fallings out, but to be honest looking back, I think they were all made out to be bigger than they should have been, i guess thats down to the kind of people we are. Sometimes I can fast forward time and see us together, living together, starting a proper go at things. Translation: I know this makes absolutely no sense, because I'm possessed by a demon who forces my hand to write shallow and hateful things to bring further torment to the people who cared about me the most. I think I want to start over again, but I'm not sure. I won;t make up my mind until you tell me "Let's do it", then I will run away again. You are a really nice guy. Our problems were a big deal to me when you loved me, but now that you're gone and I'm being cheated on, suddenly they are not that big of a deal anymore. But it's OK because WE are both at fault. Sometimes (after Ricardo pre-maturely ejaculates before I climax), I wonder if I made the right decision to leave. By sometimes, I mean 15 minutes out of every month. I'm lying here with Ollie and I know it sounds silly but I know he misses you aswell. Its crazy how attached you can get to people, when every day you walk past thosands. Is it fate that makes you stop and talk to certain people? I think it was fate that I met you when i did. I needed you in my life and I like to think you needed me aswell. I don't want to stop writing as I don't know how to end it. With love? With every bit of my heart? As your friend? best friend? Whatever happens between us, I just want to say thankyou for coming into my life Michael. X I'm lying her in bed with my stuffed animal. Don't I look cute? Can you imagine me in this bed? Naked? I'm retarded so blah blah magical stuffed animal with feelings...Are you a big enough sucker to believe that fate involves me dumping your sorry a$$? I hope you are because I need the ego boost right now. We both served a purpose in each others lives and I'm through with you, but I can't stand knowing you may have let me go already. Even though I was able to end our meaningful relationship, I can't seem to end an e-mail. So I guess I'll just throw some powerful words at you like heart and love, then backtrack to weaker words like "friends" because that's really what I want, but I want to confuse you into biting back on my hook. Thanks for being there for me. I need you again for a second, then you can leave again.
Jake99 Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 i want you to know michael that i am so grateful for everything you have done for me over the past few months. Not only for not judging me through anything but for always sticking by me and for allowing me to like myself again. When i say i couldnt have done it without you, i mean every single word of that. You taught me to forget the silly things in life and concentrate on everything good in my life, you included. I know you dont always agree with my choices but you have always been supportive for me. I have hurt you so bad, and even through it, you have put me above yourself and when i am upset and need someone, i know i can always count on you. I love everything that you've brought to my life, and the experiences we have shared together. Sometimes i feel so lonely and my mind races back through all the horrible things in my life and it is the memory of you that keeps me back to present and allows me to see good again. I don't know if this even makes sense, i'm kind of just letting my hands right whatever comes into my mind. I wish we could rewind time and start things again, not in the same circumstance. I know how we met was exciting and a rush but i wish i got to know you properly before we rushed into things. I always think what my life would be like now without you in it and to be honest michael i just can't. I think you are such a lovely person and honestly don't deserve anyting bad to come to you again. I know we have our arguements and our fallings out, but to be honest looking back, i think they were all made out to be bigger than they should have been, i guess thats down to the kind of people we are. Sometimes i can fast forward time and see us together, living together, starting a proper go at things. I'm lying here with ollie and i know it sounds silly but i know he misses you aswell. Its crazy how attached you can get to people, when every day you walk past thosands. Is it fate that makes you stop and talk to certain people? I think it was fate that i met you when i did. I needed you in my life and i like to think you needed me aswell. I don't want to stop writing as i don't know how to end it. With love? With every bit of my heart? As your friend? Best friend? Whatever happens between us, i just want to say thankyou for coming into my life michael. X right... Analysis!? run!!!!!! Run far away!!!!
500daysofsummer Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 did you respond? what are you going to do?
spiderowl Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Gosh, I am really impressed with these analyses and Suddendumpee is very incisive. Excellent! Sorry it's not encouraging though. You deserve someone who does know they want you. We all do.
Author myhearthurtsbadly Posted January 13, 2011 Author Posted January 13, 2011 did you respond? what are you going to do? No i havent responded yet however its worth bearing in mind that she has been trying to contact me every day for a while now, we broke up for the second time on the 22nd of December..
hopesndreams Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Fire off a short quick email to her. Suggestion. "If you want to get back together, we'll talk. Otherwise, leave me alone." Short n sweet. Spells it out perfectly.
0hpenelope Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Fire off a short quick email to her. Suggestion. "If you want to get back together, we'll talk. Otherwise, leave me alone." Short n sweet. Spells it out perfectly. I like this. It's what I did to my ex. "I don't want to just be your friend. I want you back, but I'm not going to wait for you. I'm not interested in hearing from you unless it's about a reconciliation." But this one's much better. Gets the point across much faster.
Ajax Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 No i havent responded yet however its worth bearing in mind that she has been trying to contact me every day for a while now, we broke up for the second time on the 22nd of December.. Three days before Christmas? Wow. She really does love you. Don't reply. This was the second breakup and there certainly hasn't been enough time for her to have worked her issues out.
Digs in Dirt Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 I don't know your history, but what jumps out at me is that it sounds like she's fishing for you to proclaim your love and admiration....she wants the ego boost. She probably wants the comfort of knowing that you're pining for her. She may be getting nervous thinking that you're moving on, and she is fishing for a response that will suggest that you're sitting at home waiting for her. Wouldn't that be a great comfort to know that you have all the time in the world to make up your mind, because someone is sitting home waiting for your call. I may be way off - that's just what came to my mind as soon as I read it.
Kansas Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 Ohpenelope how I wish I had found this website and posts like this when I stupidly broke NC with my ex 6 months ago, only to have his wishy - washy ass dump me all over again. I love it!
melenkurion Posted January 13, 2011 Posted January 13, 2011 suddendumpee's translation is spot on I'd say. It's also hilarious.
Author myhearthurtsbadly Posted January 14, 2011 Author Posted January 14, 2011 Quick update guys, she is doing a placement in Chamonix (France, We are British) and wants me to go and see her tommorow, she says she will pay for flights. What to do?!
spiderowl Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Instead of saying yes or no, you could just ask her why she wants to see you. I agree with the keeping it short and to the point. Will you get an equally wishy-washy message this time? Please ask Suddendumpee to translate.
Ajax Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Quick update guys, she is doing a placement in Chamonix (France, We are British) and wants me to go and see her tommorow, she says she will pay for flights. What to do?! I'd be extremely skeptical. Is she just lonely and figures it'll be easy to get you to visit? Better figure out what her motive is.
0hpenelope Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Quick update guys, she is doing a placement in Chamonix (France, We are British) and wants me to go and see her tommorow, she says she will pay for flights. What to do?! UH... Where is this girl's head at and may I also take my brain there? It sounds so whimsical, disconnected, and very, very insensitive. "Why do you want me to see you?" should not be a hard question to answer, even if her brain is in La La Land.
nature Posted January 16, 2011 Posted January 16, 2011 It sounds to me like you are going to go and see her, regardless of what anyone says here. You must have replied to her email for her to have invited you to come see her. What SuddenDumpee said is spot on. However, you are at that "stage" where you don't want to believe this. You want to see the best in her still and believe that she really does love you. I know exactly what you are doing and thinking, because I have been where you are before. Listen to Sudden Dumpee, even tho you don't want to. He/She is dead on.
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