dont-be-naive Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Tips? Dude my tip is to STOP BEIN PU**Y WHIPPED lol. Youre p-whipped already and ur not even married to her. Tip of the year - dont be with a woman that is bangin anotha guy on a regular basis. That goes for ladies too and theyre men. this hits the nail on the head. don't take what philly said as an insult. you need to listen to it and take it seriously. Dan, she is playing you like a fiddle, why do you put up with it? Why don't you find a decent woman who won't do this to you? Besides, as I said before, she is a cheater. don't think you would ever be so special that she wouldn't do it to you if you wound up with her and accumulated some years with each other.
dont-be-naive Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 As I didn't start this thread asking for advice all I'll say is that each A is different & all men in an A aren't serial liars & cheaters. cheaters ARE liars, unless they have told their spouses that they are cheating. Until my MM does something that makes me not trust him or his intentions I choose to believe the man I love & be hopeful things will work out. you think you are different? and that if you ever got together with him, married him, that he won't be looking to get some strange in the future because sex with the same woman isn't as exciting as it use to be? the 7 year itch for people that can't handle monogomy is a beyotch.
Mimolicious Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 *Shaking Head* Pfft! Listen to yourself. Unreal. So wait, should everything halt because you decide to be wasting your time with a MW? Hone, get yourself a single gal that you can go on vacation with. I am pretty sure than when you are all hot & sweaty with his W, you are not thinking about the poor H. Stop hating! BTW, when you are in a situation that you dont like... 2 things, either deal with it or change scenarios.
jwi71 Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 "people that are divorcing don't go on vacations together!!!" This. During my D I had no intention of taking my xWW anywhere. Except maybe the gallows. Does that count?
Spark1111 Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 This. During my D I had no intention of taking my xWW anywhere. Except maybe the gallows. Does that count? Great line!....and it so rings true! Thanks all for explaining the incessant texting and phone calling that appeared on the cell phone bills while on vacation. I did not realize that our trips and vacations made her so insecure, and the necessary reassuring he had to do to console her. This was all under the guise of conducting "Business" while away. He planned the trips. One was for our anniversary. After she texted him, he picked a big fight with me. (I deduced much, much later.) I guess he needed to convince himself what he had just told her was true! In fact, I discovered the affair when we accidentally switched phones on a trip to a family reunion. He texted her something very loving and reassuring. I get it now.
Spark1111 Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 My xMM when on a trip with his wife...my freaked out reply to him was "people that are divorcing don't go on vacations together!!!" Of course his excuses were, "it's not like it's romantic, so and so is going too..but I've always wanted to go there, that's why I am going!...she booked tickets last winter, I have to go now or she will lose money." And of course, he sneaked around iming me and sending me messages every chance he got to tell me how utterly miserable he was and he missed me...yeah, right. Ridiculous. Wow, Blizzard....this rings true for my sitch too. Sorry you had to go through this.
pureinheart Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Aww, I feel the same way when my MM's parents come to visit. He's stuck at home with everyone under the same roof & his parents do NOT like the wifey. It makes for a very stressful week for him. He set a date to leave - June 1st, and then about a month ago they were Skype-ing with his parents and right in front of the wifey his Mum said, "Oh! We bought tickets to come & visit in late June." That day we were just talking about how he needed to tell his parents to wait until later this year to visit because he's leaving & THAT flippin' day they mention it. Now we've decided it's best if he waits until after their visit to leave. Their visits are stressful already & I know he's going to be a nervous wreck the whole time because he's planning on telling them what's going on & leaving the day after they go back home. He was going to tell them not to come, but that would just open a big ole can of worms that we don't want opened yet. omg don't you see, something will always change the date somthing will always come up... Hi JSP, In my case exDM never had a "leave" date...this is a touchy situation though...in the event that he doesn't leave do you have a "what will I do plan"? I am speaking of guidelines. Due to the fact that he has said he will leave, personally I think it would be important to stick to the plan HE has set forth.
JsSweetPea Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Hi JSP, In my case exDM never had a "leave" date...this is a touchy situation though...in the event that he doesn't leave do you have a "what will I do plan"? I am speaking of guidelines. Due to the fact that he has said he will leave, personally I think it would be important to stick to the plan HE has set forth. Hi Pure, If he doesn't leave I'm done. Plain but not so simple, I know.
pureinheart Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Hi Pure, If he doesn't leave I'm done. Plain but not so simple, I know. Right on gf!!!! You go girl! My mistake was not having a plan, especially with the unstable circumstances in front of me. Certainly we can't anticipate, nor plan every detail, although there was a poster in this forum who was well aware of what "could" happen, so although she loves her MM dearly, she's ready to walk also if she has to. I was "hoping" everything would turn out ok, and that was not realistic, especially in my case. Actually it sounds plain and clear to me:D
JsSweetPea Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Right on gf!!!! You go girl! My mistake was not having a plan, especially with the unstable circumstances in front of me. Certainly we can't anticipate, nor plan every detail, although there was a poster in this forum who was well aware of what "could" happen, so although she loves her MM dearly, she's ready to walk also if she has to. I was "hoping" everything would turn out ok, and that was not realistic, especially in my case. Actually it sounds plain and clear to me:D Thanks, Pure. I have thought about all the outcomes of our situation, good & bad. My MM & I say if we can both live with the WORST possible outcome but still be happy because we're together then we keep moving forward, if that makes sense. I am super hopeful & optimistic about our future but realize I have to travel one hell of a road to get there. If it doesn't work out of course I'll be heartbroken but I'm willing to take the risk. I was going to post more details of my situation but if I do I'm sure I'll just get a bunch of people telling me how stupid I am to believe him & blahblahblah.... I'm sure people mean well but some people come here just to vent, not to be told to leave their MM. It's frustrating....
Author DanY2J Posted January 15, 2011 Author Posted January 15, 2011 Received a card in the post today from her. A cartoon monkey (what she calls me) sitting in a tree and inside the card a picture of some writing in the sand that she has done saying "everday, minute, hour X" That has annoyed me.
greengoddess Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Hi Pure, If he doesn't leave I'm done. Plain but not so simple, I know. It's a stall tactic. I just don't want you to waste more time and to get hurt more. It's HIS parents. HIS parents don't like her. Ok so why would he not tell his parents the truth, have them come visit anyhow and they can help support him and the grandkids in the move out.
woinlove Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 Received a card in the post today from her. A cartoon monkey (what she calls me) sitting in a tree and inside the card a picture of some writing in the sand that she has done saying "everday, minute, hour X" That has annoyed me. Annoyed is good. A step on the way to expecting more.
Recommended Posts