Vickstar Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 I think my ex jumped into a relationship about 2 months after our year relastionship, is this considered a rebound relationship?
carhill Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 Two questions: Who dumped who? Why does it matter?
Author Vickstar Posted January 12, 2011 Author Posted January 12, 2011 He dumped me 3months ago, i really believed he loved me but then i had money problems and he got bored of us not going out cos i couldnt afford it. Im just curious, i know i shouldnt care and i am trying to focus on myself and i was doing great until i found out on monday that he had a gf, ive only contacted him once so i havent done bad on the NC thing, i havent begged him at all. Also i hear that she may be travelling in south america this year so i kinda though it may be a rebound cos he would never do the travelling thing with her.
GorillaTheater Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 Whether it's a "rebound" has alot more to do with his state of mind than a specific time frame. In my book, a "rebound" occurs when a person isn't sufficiently over an ex, hasn't sufficiently worked through any issues from that relationship, and isn't in a healthy place to start up a new relationship. If he dumped you, he may well be emotionally detached enough so that this isn't a rebound. Your best bet in any event is to detach yourself. Tell yourself that it doesn't matter what he's doing and why. The time will come when that will be true, hopefully sooner rather than later.
carhill Posted January 12, 2011 Posted January 12, 2011 He dumped me 3months ago, i really believed he loved me but then i had money problems and he got bored of us not going out cos i couldnt afford it. Yep, GT likely has the scenario. The 'bored' part due to your perceived financial situation was just a convenient 'reason' to explain his existing detachment. Generally, though not globally, people who are 'bored' have either already found another partner or are in the process of doing so. This means they are detached or have been all along. Some people 'think' relationships. Until one experiences such a dynamic and sees the signs and processes it in retrospect, it's really hard to tell. My opinion is that his current situation isn't a rebound so much as just another link in the chain of his relationship style. He'll get 'bored' again, and again, until he stops getting bored. Maybe never. Not your problem
Author Vickstar Posted January 12, 2011 Author Posted January 12, 2011 thanks for your views, they both work with each other so i reckon its just a sex thing but who knows, its very hard not to think about this sort of stuff but i am trying to get on with life
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