purplegerberdaisy Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 My hubbs and I have been married for 8 years and together for 10 years. It certainly doesn't bother me if he looks at another woman. He is not lusting after her, he is looking. My hubbs can appreciate a nice bum, cleavage, whatever it is. But guess what? He's coming home with me.
alphamale Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 I would much rather have stayed home alone than to have to sit though multiple 10-30 second awkward silences while the man drooled over other women. a gentleman should be discreet
SarcasticBlonde Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Do all men check women out? Even if they're married or taken? I was at the store today when my boyfriend glanced at another womans butt. He basically turned his head to watch her walk, then stopped and continued to walk through the mall with me. I was rather insulted, I know its natural to check people out, but did he have to look at another womans butt while I was there? It's not like he did a stop & stare ordeal. But his head was looking at her butt for a good 10 seconds. Girls/Women do you get annoyed with this too? Guys, is just a natural thing you do? Do you sometimes not realize that your doing it? How does this work for you? Even if your girlfriend is extremely attractive are you still going to look at these other women (who arent even as pretty?) I guess im asking these so I can figure how to feel about this. Opinions please? Id like to add that I know females do this too, and I'm not trying to point at one gender, the title is to attract the male gender in. I apologize if you assumed I was pointing fingers. My boyfriend did this while we were at dinner the other night. It doesn't bother me. He was just admiring an attractive woman. Its human nature.
SmileFace Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 I don't let it bother it. If the butt looks really good, I am probably staring too. Agreed lol
soserious1 Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Anybody ever gotten up and left an ogling partner at a restaurant or event?
tigressA Posted January 14, 2011 Posted January 14, 2011 Anybody ever gotten up and left an ogling partner at a restaurant or event? I was headed to a bar with my ex once and he literally stopped in his tracks, turned his head and gawked openly at another woman walking by. I stood there fuming for a few seconds and then just started walking really fast ahead of him. He caught up to me all pissy and we got in a huge fight--he didn't care to understand why I felt so hurt and offended by what he had done. Gentlemen won't act anything like that while looking at other women.
Eeyore79 Posted January 15, 2011 Posted January 15, 2011 I notice whether men and women are attractive, and I have been known to stare at a particularly handsome man. I'm perfectly happy with my boyfriend and wouldn't want anyone else, but it's just human nature to look at an attractive person.
Negative Nancy Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 I've only been with one guy who was obvious about it. And I guess I'm the only female on here who's going to admit it, but I hate when they do it. Yes, yes, I understand human nature blah blah blah. Doesn't mean I have to like it. No, you're not the only one. I hate it too.
Negative Nancy Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 all jokes aside, men appreciate the female form. ladies, the guy you're with (were with in the past) sized up what you were packing in the same manner. yes, it's innate. guys love T&A, period. with regard to conduct, I've seen this slip both ways. I'm among the camp that can shift their head (ever so slightly) and turn the hell out of my eyes in order to see what should be admired without getting busted (more often than not). then there's the other camp that can only look straight, apparently... T&A's gotta be front & center under any given circumstance. okay, to each their own. ladies, we look; we admire; we fantisize; we watch porn; & we talk about all of the above to our buddies. this is how guys operate. do we love the girls who put up with our bs & opt to choose us over all the others, of course we do. that's why we look so hard. we'd love to smack the ass of the chick walking down the street; fact is, we can't. cause those of us that are taken (and true to our word) said we wouldn't. we got some ass to smack already is the bottom line. be happy about that ladies; & just let us fantasize if we truly agree not to touch. [stepping off my soap box] Reading this makes me wanna leave my boyfriend immediately. If all men think like this and if woman is never good enough or beautiful enough, then why even bother? You would think that a boyfriend chose you cos he found you more attractive than others, but still having thoughts of "smacking other asses" even in a relationship is just an insult to that. I think I better gett off this forum now before I do something that I might regret later.
AverageJoe Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 Reading this makes me wanna leave my boyfriend immediately. If all men think like this and if woman is never good enough or beautiful enough, then why even bother? You would think that a boyfriend chose you cos he found you more attractive than others, but still having thoughts of "smacking other asses" even in a relationship is just an insult to that. I think I better gett off this forum now before I do something that I might regret later. You should probably go ahead and get it out of the way. Do him a favor. Please save his poor soul from the torture of your inability to grasp the male mind as alien as it may seem to you.
Nexus One Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 (edited) Reading this makes me wanna leave my boyfriend immediately. If all men think like this and if woman is never good enough or beautiful enough, then why even bother? You would think that a boyfriend chose you cos he found you more attractive than others, but still having thoughts of "smacking other asses" even in a relationship is just an insult to that. I think I better gett off this forum now before I do something that I might regret later. It's nonsense that all men do that. And you shouldn't break up with your boyfriend just because of some forum post. This is teh internets, chill. Edited January 22, 2011 by Nexus One
whichwayisup Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 Do all men check women out? Even if they're married or taken? Yes. And I'm sure many women check out men too, or notice certain things on a guy. It's not a big deal unless you make it into one. I look, my H looks, sometimes I point out a woman, (I give a look, a sound, or say 'boobs, left, black shirt' and he'll check it out) to him and we get a kick out of it. It is what it is..
whichwayisup Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 Reading this makes me wanna leave my boyfriend immediately. If all men think like this and if woman is never good enough or beautiful enough, then why even bother? You need to put things in perspective otherwise you're going to be a very lonely woman later in life. Many men look but it doesn't mean anything. Its a glance, a once over, quick thought and then it's gone. If that bothers you so much and makes you feel insecure, that you aren't hot or beautiful enough then you need to work on your self esteem and gain self confidence.
Joe Normal Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 The only way you are going to avoid a guy looking at other women is if you are so hot yourself that he is going gaga staring at *your* body instead. Or if he is so in love with you that he thinks you are that hot (even if you're not). So, staring at other women = <100% love/lust over you. But that's most relationships for you.
Negative Nancy Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 staring at other women = <100% love/lust over you thats exactly why it bothers me. why men tell me to chill is beyond me considering that they are the ones who have even more extreme hang-ups with women, namely the "my girlfriend's past bothers me". at least THAT past was in the past, whereas men's action of ogling other women is something they do in the present, while in a relationship. so women are just insecure and need to get over it when they don't like feeling like their man wants to bang other women IN THE RELATIONSHIP, but men pat each other on the back and comfort each other about "dumping the slut" when it comes to their girlfriend's PAST?
Jonno_S Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 (edited) Yes all men check out women. My bf does it in front of me but I don't care because we both do it -- I can spot an attractive woman just as quickly as he can, and then we both check her out, sometimes even discussing whether she was hot or not or has a nice a$$ or not. It's actually entertaining, and it's far better to just join him than act like he shouldn't be looking at all. Everybody looks. This is definitely a better point of view but it depends on so many factors, like the the relationship and the security, the insecurity of one, the length of time of the look, the basis for it, etc. etc. etc. I dated a girl who would be the first one to point out that someone was hot. I liked that. I also dated a woman who was insanely jealous and harmless glances were interpreted as the worst lears. I do think the guy should be sensitive to the woman here because it can be offensive; it's not necessary behavior and can be easily unlearned. I also think that men make the mistake of being too obvious when they do it. Turning around on the sidewalk and staring is classless and worse, saying something (I heard, "Yum yum yum" once) is worse. Edited January 22, 2011 by Jonno_S
Woggle Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 thats exactly why it bothers me. why men tell me to chill is beyond me considering that they are the ones who have even more extreme hang-ups with women, namely the "my girlfriend's past bothers me". at least THAT past was in the past, whereas men's action of ogling other women is something they do in the present, while in a relationship. so women are just insecure and need to get over it when they don't like feeling like their man wants to bang other women IN THE RELATIONSHIP, but men pat each other on the back and comfort each other about "dumping the slut" when it comes to their girlfriend's PAST? So in the other thread you say it is okay for a woman to flat out cheat with another man but a man who even checks out another woman is a pig?
Negative Nancy Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 So in the other thread you say it is okay for a woman to flat out cheat with another man ??? tunnel vision much? show me WHERE i said THAT.
Nexus One Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 (edited) why men tell me to chill is beyond me considering that they are the ones who have even more extreme hang-ups with women, namely the "my girlfriend's past bothers me". You've misunderstood the reason why I said "chill". The reason I said that was because you shouldn't dump your boyfriend over a forum post which speaks in general terms about men. Terms that may not even apply to your boyfriend. And even if he does every so now and then glance over at another woman, then still your decision should be based on your own reasons and not the one in some forum post. so women are just insecure and need to get over it when they don't like feeling like their man wants to bang other women IN THE RELATIONSHIP, No you don't need to get over it first of all. Second of all I doubt that glancing over at another woman means men want to have sex with her and cheat on you. That's a huge jump you make there from glancing at someone to wanting to f*ck them while cheating on your current girlfriend. but men pat each other on the back and comfort each other about "dumping the slut" when it comes to their girlfriend's PAST? You've also misunderstood that one. As a guy you can't hold your girlfriend's past against her, that would be unethical, because she can't change her past. The only thing men can do in this regard is see if the girl/woman has broken with past patterns if she had any. (like patterns of sleeping around a lot) Past "adventures" are merely secondary information in such an equation, to be able to paint a mental picture and project a possible future. A woman's past is by no means the final indicator for whether a guy should dump her or not. Keep this in mind, not all men are the same. This also applies to humans in general. Not every person is the same. You'll have to look at each person individually and how they relate to you and others. And the now is more important than the past, even though the past can be a good indicator for future behavior. People do learn from their mistakes and a past past full of mistakes can make a human a really good person if he/she learns from those mistakes. Edited January 22, 2011 by Nexus One
Woggle Posted January 22, 2011 Posted January 22, 2011 ??? tunnel vision much? show me WHERE i said THAT. You mad the comment about the shoe being on the other foot which implied that it was deserved.
Recommended Posts