SophiaL Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 I spoke to to my ex boyfriend of 7 years, 5 days ago...he said he was quite surprised as i hadn't contacted him for a while...it was a long talk where I have told him I was moving on and looking for the positive side on things...i could sense by the tone of his voice and by the amount of time he took to say something back to me that he was trying to 'digest' what i was saying to him... he's told me he is still seeing the same girl which he met soon after we broke up (he was seeing more than one at one point!), but he said he's not in a relationship with her, but they just have a good time! Which still, doesn't make much sense as she goes over to his place at least 3 nights a week (though they rarely go out together!). He said that he's happy for me to be moving on and that if it is meant to be we would one day sit down and talk about the two of us. He's a very nice guy and I was a bit horrible to him when we were together (no cheating or anything, but didn't show how much i appreciated him when we were together! the break up was a mutual decision, I just felt that there was something missing in the relationship we had). I shouldn't be thinking about him and this girl, because he has moved on and so should I (specially after 6 months!) but, it still gets to me. I know I'm not the only one in this situation right now, and that time will heal... but I would love to see how you guys are coping with this kind of situation and any advice really....
Movingthrough Posted January 11, 2011 Posted January 11, 2011 Well as much as i hate to say this, this is very common. It happened to me and probably 100 people on here. What i have found in my months of reading on here, buying books etc, is that most people leave for GIGS (grass in greener). Even if the relationship had a bad run or was always bad, it always comes down to thinking something is better when you leave. Right now my ex is with a guy and she got with him pretty much right after me. I never really called her on it but she told me that it happened after and that she has never lied to me, only reason i somewhat believe it is another friend who knows her confirmed it. Doesnt matter anyway but like i said, it seems to be common. For some reason even when we dont like the behavior of our exes, and know that we wouldnt want to be with someone who would do that to us we still hang on, and that "something" that makes us hang on is what im trying to figure out now..
Author SophiaL Posted January 11, 2011 Author Posted January 11, 2011 I guess that 'something' that makes us hold on to our ex could be many things, but mainly could be only our habit kicking in, I was with him for 7 years and suddenly the reality of being single and not having that person that knew everything about you and who shared important moments with is really hard to accept! I sometimes just feel like calling him, because hearing his voice would make me feel safer and stronger, but knowing he now has somebody else hurts!! I just wish this feeling would go away!!
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