jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 (edited) God, I don't wanna go through this. I don't think I physically can.... On Friday, me and my ex met up for dinner and went back to watch a movie at his place. He was SUPER affectionate and saying sweet things. I slept over....we made out and whatnot but i refused to have sex because I didn't wanna feel used (again). He was persistant, kept saying he loved kissing me...blah blah. The next morning he was distant and cold and asked what time I wanted to go home, i thought we were supposed to go to the movies that day but whatever...so on the ride home i ask wtf is going on here and he says "I dont wanna be with you anymore, i dont wanna see you, exchange emails, i want to move on" and i said "i dont believe you, this is all just because of your family!!" he said "I'm not even attracted to you anymore." Are you kidding me? You spent all night trying to get in my pants and your not even attracted to me? That hurt so badly... I dunno what to do with myself anymore. I have no one. I have no f**king real friends and I hate my life. On the outside I look like I have everything...inside, where it matters, I have $h!t. I feel so used. Why do people treat other people so badly? Does no one have a conscience(sp?)? Edited January 10, 2011 by jen_r
KYoung2200 Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 Another fellow Bostonite going through a breakup? Must be something in the water. I don't know what to tell you. I can barely handle what I'm being dealt right now myself. Everyone keeps saying hang in there, things get better. I sure hope so.
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 Another fellow Bostonite going through a breakup? Must be something in the water. I don't know what to tell you. I can barely handle what I'm being dealt right now myself. Everyone keeps saying hang in there, things get better. I sure hope so. Must be that dirrty water, har har. lol...it's almost impossible to just hang in there. I feel like I'm different from everyone else and can't cope like a normal person.
KYoung2200 Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 Same. I've been talking to my friends a lot... But you don't have anyone you can call? Family, friends? Anyone?
SDA Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 Must be that dirrty water, har har. lol...it's almost impossible to just hang in there. I feel like I'm different from everyone else and can't cope like a normal person. You are no different just people handle it differently than others. This guy is an ******* I mean he's lying straight to your face and is using you for whatever reason. I'm in pain right now with a girl who "wants to be with me but doesn't want too at the same time" and I'm the only one she wants to be with. I am confused and haven't heard from her in a week and I'm leaving for school and won't see her for a month and a half. It will be a good thing for me though. My point is that we all suffer pain on LS and you are not alone. Take it day by day. Call your mom or someone and talk to them about your feelings. However old you are make friends and work or school and spend time with them. Be healthy and don't talk to this man he isn't helping you. We're always here to help you so i hope you can try and calm down and know that in time you will feel better. I promise you.
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 You are no different just people handle it differently than others. This guy is an ******* I mean he's lying straight to your face and is using you for whatever reason. I'm in pain right now with a girl who "wants to be with me but doesn't want too at the same time" and I'm the only one she wants to be with. I am confused and haven't heard from her in a week and I'm leaving for school and won't see her for a month and a half. It will be a good thing for me though. My point is that we all suffer pain on LS and you are not alone. Take it day by day. Call your mom or someone and talk to them about your feelings. However old you are make friends and work or school and spend time with them. Be healthy and don't talk to this man he isn't helping you. We're always here to help you so i hope you can try and calm down and know that in time you will feel better. I promise you. I'm trying not to talk to him, it's just hard. I've been asking how he could do this to me, but hes blocked my #, my email, my FB. I feel like I don't know how to move on, i'm guessing its because i wont let myself. Im afraid that if i start to let go, then its real and were really over. But why do i want him back anyways? I dont know whats going on with me.
Ajax Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 Sorry you're feeling this way jen. I think that heartbreak is the hardest thing to go through, and to have to do it alone just makes it worse. Luckily you have us here It hurts and we have to feel the pain in order to heal properly. I for one think I've probably wallowed in the pain for too long and am trying to dig myself out of it. But when the pain is fresh we need to take some time to just go through the waves of feelings that come. And if you need to vent to someone feel free to PM me... I'm going to be at my computer all day writing a paper for school (or should be).
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 Same. I've been talking to my friends a lot... But you don't have anyone you can call? Family, friends? Anyone? I have ppl to call but A) no one wants to hear about this situation anymore and B) everyone will just say GOOD, i'm glad its over! Which is why i come here to chat :-/
Leandro Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 Sorry to hear that Jen . All you can do it go NC with this dude. Better off without him.
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 Sorry you're feeling this way jen. I think that heartbreak is the hardest thing to go through, and to have to do it alone just makes it worse. Luckily you have us here It hurts and we have to feel the pain in order to heal properly. I for one think I've probably wallowed in the pain for too long and am trying to dig myself out of it. But when the pain is fresh we need to take some time to just go through the waves of feelings that come. And if you need to vent to someone feel free to PM me... I'm going to be at my computer all day writing a paper for school (or should be). I am on my way to the hospital right now to check up on my broken wrist, don't be surprised to get a PM from me in a few hours. I think i need some real talking to, a slap in the face or something - maybe you can do that for me...lol
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 Sorry to hear that Jen . All you can do it go NC with this dude. Better off without him. Hes begging for me to go NC, I almost don't wanna give him the satisfaction.
Ajax Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 I am on my way to the hospital right now to check up on my broken wrist, don't be surprised to get a PM from me in a few hours. I think i need some real talking to, a slap in the face or something - maybe you can do that for me...lol Hope the wrist is better then. As for slapping your face though, I don't hit girls.
KYoung2200 Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 I have ppl to call but A) no one wants to hear about this situation anymore and B) everyone will just say GOOD, i'm glad its over! Which is why i come here to chat :-/ As others have said, this is why we're all here. Try to keep busy around the place and definitely definitely definitely try to go NC. We're all here for eachother.
Akumark Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 I don't know about you guys but for me it takes about 30 min. after I mind myself for sex before returning to my normal self, you can barely talk to me in those 30 min. as if I needed all my concentration to turn me off Maybe this guy need a couple of hours
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 I don't know about you guys but for me it takes about 30 min. after I mind myself for sex before returning to my normal self, you can barely talk to me in those 30 min. as if I needed all my concentration to turn me off Maybe this guy need a couple of hours lol, what? You lost me on that one. Anywho, wrist is getting better. 4 more weeks to go, but he said i could take the splint off if i wish, which kind of baffles me since he originally wanted to put me in a cast for 4 weeks. I refused the cast and took the velcro splint, don't think i'll be taking it off anytime soon. Still haven't heard back from the jerk, i did manage to send a message on FB b4 i was blocked, guess that means he has no intentions of responding. I dunno what I have done to deserve this treatment. He'd acting as if i'm the bad guy here...idk.
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 he's just being immature. Ignore him. My ex is being immature? or the guy above with the 30 min comment?
KYoung2200 Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 If she's really from Boston she can handle a LOT of immature comments. Hahaha. But really, your ex is being immature on a personal level. He's not worth your time.
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 If she's really from Boston she can handle a LOT of immature comments. Hahaha. But really, your ex is being immature on a personal level. He's not worth your time. lol born & raised my friend. Hes been worth the past 2 1/2 years of my life. I can't just let this go. Dating is an odd thing, why get so attatched to someone when you don't know what the future holds for you two? I can't see myself giving myself like i did with him to someone else.
Ajax Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 lol, what? You lost me on that one. Anywho, wrist is getting better. 4 more weeks to go, but he said i could take the splint off if i wish, which kind of baffles me since he originally wanted to put me in a cast for 4 weeks. I refused the cast and took the velcro splint, don't think i'll be taking it off anytime soon. Still haven't heard back from the jerk, i did manage to send a message on FB b4 i was blocked, guess that means he has no intentions of responding. I dunno what I have done to deserve this treatment. He'd acting as if i'm the bad guy here...idk. Glad your wrist is on the mend. I think your heart will be soon too. Your ex sounds like a flaky person. Maybe he used you... it's a definite possibility. But allow me to offer another perspective. He might be scared and is putting up a wall. If you spent the night with him he might be feeling vulnerable, and if you refused to have sex with him (which was the right thing for you to do by the way) he might have felt rejected. From his perspective he might be in self defense mode. I'm not excusing his behavior by any means. It's still immature and hurtful to you, and he needs to get his act together. Not that it will make you feel any better, but remember that you can't control his actions. Concentrate on you and if he comes back you can deal with it then, when you're more healed.
KYoung2200 Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 lol born & raised my friend. Hes been worth the past 2 1/2 years of my life. I can't just let this go. Dating is an odd thing, why get so attatched to someone when you don't know what the future holds for you two? I can't see myself giving myself like i did with him to someone else. He WAS worth your time. The way he's acting right now makes him unworthy of your time. Your heart and head are still confused. You deserve better than what he's giving you. Bottom line.
Author jen_r Posted January 10, 2011 Author Posted January 10, 2011 Glad your wrist is on the mend. I think your heart will be soon too. Your ex sounds like a flaky person. Maybe he used you... it's a definite possibility. But allow me to offer another perspective. He might be scared and is putting up a wall. If you spent the night with him he might be feeling vulnerable, and if you refused to have sex with him (which was the right thing for you to do by the way) he might have felt rejected. From his perspective he might be in self defense mode. I'm not excusing his behavior by any means. It's still immature and hurtful to you, and he needs to get his act together. Not that it will make you feel any better, but remember that you can't control his actions. Concentrate on you and if he comes back you can deal with it then, when you're more healed. Maybe. It seems like he doesn't have any feelings. So, i'm guessing he wasn't hurt that i rejected him, probably more pissed that he didn't "get some". I think there is something wrong with him, i really do. I think he takes out his anger on his family, on me. He WAS worth your time. The way he's acting right now makes him unworthy of your time. Your heart and head are still confused. You deserve better than what he's giving you. Bottom line. Yea....i guess.
cerridwen Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 lol born & raised my friend. Hes been worth the past 2 1/2 years of my life. I can't just let this go. Dating is an odd thing, why get so attatched to someone when you don't know what the future holds for you two? I can't see myself giving myself like i did with him to someone else. You can PM me too jen. I've had a few jerks in my past, had guy friends that treated women like that, and I don't mind helping you with some of the thought process behind such behavior. It's pretty twisted. No judgment. Hit me up if you're feeling alone.
KYoung2200 Posted January 10, 2011 Posted January 10, 2011 If you said the same thing to me about my ex I'd have a bit of doubt about you, too. Trust me, so I know how you feel. Why not go out and hit up some of the bars around the area? I know there's some good ones. I'd say you could PM me, too, but I don't know how that even works here.
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