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High Maintenance Man


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Posted
Is he a Virgo?

He's a Scorpio

Posted
Thanks I think I will say something next time he gets into a funk.

 

No, do not wait til then. If he is feeling physically sick, he will already be miserable and you won't have a productive conversation because he will feel put-upon (because you are bringing up a conversation like that when he's feeling miserable).

 

Talk to him OUTSIDE of the funks.

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Posted
No, do not wait til then. If he is feeling physically sick, he will already be miserable and you won't have a productive conversation because he will feel put-upon (because you are bringing up a conversation like that when he's feeling miserable).

 

Talk to him OUTSIDE of the funks.

 

OK, thanks.

Posted

This.

 

 

If I were in your position, I would try

i) to explain to him the effects of his complaints to the relationship and how it makes you feel, emphasising that you don't think the situation is sustainable in the long run

ii) tell him that you need openness in a relationship about health, especially when it's such a big part of his life

iii) tell him that he needs to be able to give you emotional support, and not just the other way around.

 

If those three issues can't be constructively addressed by the two of you together, I think this is going to be really difficult in the long term.

 

It's this simple: You need to tell him how you feel. If he doesn't even want to hear you out or respect your feelings, then that should tell you everything you need to know.

Posted
he respects me and treats me kindly.
I'm sorry, but IMO this isn't true if he invalidates your lousy day at the office just because it isn't a physical pain.
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