Woman DO NOT like jerks...we DO WANT nice guys!

[Kamille]

Nah, I just decided one day to start acting like your average modern woman. What's good for the goose, is good for the gander. I thought feminism was about expressing our sexuality? So it's okay for a woman to, but not a man? It's not my fault these women wanted my nob.

 

 

Correction: I should have said, by your own admissions, you're the one who needs better moral standards.

 

You're the one who thinks there's a problem with society and who is judging others based on their sexual activities.

 

I couldn't care less who what when where and with whom anyone has sex, as long as it's consensual sex. I'm not the one making gross generalizations about gender and race.

[Untouchable_Fire]

You just said two completely opposite things. First you said, that men should be "protective" of women, and then you said we should "take away the perception of women as weak." Also, taking away a woman's sexuality and making it less acceptable than a man's weakens her; it doesn't strengthen her.

 

Weak as in vulnerable. If you have someone protecting you then you are not weak. So, those ideas are not mutually exclusive. Additionally women should look out for one another more, not just in social settings but in terms of vulnerability.

 

Uh... I accidentally typed Wonton as in chinese soup instead of Wanton as is lewd and immoral. Boys and Girls should be taught to respect their bodies, and to not let others abuse them... or to foolishly engage in hedonistic behaviors.

 

As far as the respect thing goes, of course I think our society (and pretty much every society I've ever seen) could use more respect. I don't think promiscuity or sexuality has one thing to do with that. And certainly I find many of the things you say disrespectful and even dehumanizing towards women. So, what's respect? Is it chastity? That seems rather silly. The socities that most value a woman's chastity are the ones that least respect women as people.

 

Yeah, I'm sure you do find me disrepectful. Because you don't take the time to read or understand most of what I say. Which I know can come across as harsh. I pretty much have one world view and I rarely deviate from that unless I am providing specific advice on a situation.

 

Seriously, are you trying to say there is no middle ground between demanding virgins upon marriage and rampant promiscuity?

 

Everyone, male or female, has felt ill-used by dating at some point, whether they were maliciously ill-used or not. That's the truth. And certainly we could do a bit better to be kind and constructive with our fellow human beings, but that has not one thing to do with the way a woman dresses or how many men she's slept with.

 

You know that isn't true. High number people, both men and women in all but very rare circumstances have emotional issues.

 

We are creatures of biology. Over the last 100,000 years of human evolution, how long have we had condoms and birth control? 50?

 

Sex is risky... that is a biological fact! We are hardwired in our genetic code to understand that fact. Even if some people can ignore that, most wont. Sex comes with consequences, even if today those are primarily emotional.

[Jazzari]

great post; how about your likes/dislikes regarding the "bad boy" aka "jerk".

do tell.

I have such a hard time describing this, but I think there is a huge difference between my definition of a "bad boy" and a "jerk".

 

I love a bad boy. I hate a jerk. I'm indifferent to the nice guy.

 

Girl: Will you hold my drink?

 

Jerk: No way.

Nice Guy: Sure. Would you like me to hold your coat too?

Bad Boy: Sure. I won't promise not to spike it though.

 

I'd walk from the jerk and never give him another thought.

 

I'd thank the nice guy but there wouldn't be any spark and I'd likely drift off.

 

But the bad boy said something unexpected that made me laugh. I know he's kidding but he still comes across as a little dangerous and unpredictable. I'd be very interested in him.

 

A bad boy is fun. He is never nasty, rude or hurtful like a jerk would be. Unlike the nice guy, he is unpredictable and never bland. It isn't easy to win his heart, but the challenge and fun of the chase makes him irresistable. And once won, he gives his whole heart and is an absolute keeper.

[zengirl]

Weak as in vulnerable. If you have someone protecting you then you are not weak.

 

Yes, you are still weak, if your strength comes from others rather than yourself. Which is not to say that protecting others, including women, is not a good idea, or that strength in numbers is bad. I don't even think 'weakness' is bad. It is a part of life and having a mortal body. But if we're talking about definitions, having protection is a temporary state, and the weakness remains.

 

Uh... I accidentally typed Wonton as in chinese soup instead of Wanton as is lewd and immoral. Boys and Girls should be taught to respect their bodies, and to not let others abuse them... or to foolishly engage in hedonistic behaviors.

 

I do think people should respect their bodies. And do with them as they choose. Sexuality is far too closed, even with most promiscuous people. People need to own their bodies, their choices, and their sexuality. Neither chastity, nor promiscuity (as it mostly occurs) generally allows for this nowadays. But covering up one's body to "show respect" is missing the point of owning your own sexuality, as is sleeping with everyone, if it's not true to yourself.

 

Yeah, I'm sure you do find me disrepectful. Because you don't take the time to read or understand most of what I say. Which I know can come across as harsh. I pretty much have one world view and I rarely deviate from that unless I am providing specific advice on a situation.

 

Oh, no, I have great reading comprehension. I just find your world view offensive. That doesn't dismiss your right to have it, mind you. I'm pretty fair-minded and free-minded in that respect.

 

Seriously, are you trying to say there is no middle ground between demanding virgins upon marriage and rampant promiscuity?

 

Oh, there's tons of middle ground. I don't see this 'rampant promiscuity' being so widespread or societal as you do, though.

 

You know that isn't true. High number people, both men and women in all but very rare circumstances have emotional issues.

 

We are creatures of biology. Over the last 100,000 years of human evolution, how long have we had condoms and birth control? 50?

 

Sex is risky... that is a biological fact! We are hardwired in our genetic code to understand that fact. Even if some people can ignore that, most wont. Sex comes with consequences, even if today those are primarily emotional.

 

Actually, both men and women (like most animals) are hard-wired to desire sex, because procreation is not risky for the species, and that's how such biology works. In fact, NOT procreating is risky for the species.

 

What you're spouting is often said -- as though the female's genetic code is hardwired to resist sex; it's not, though historically, this was introduced later, as society formed -- it is not actually based in biological or chemical fact.

[Woggle]

I won't sit here and stereotype all white women because many of them are great but they do tend to get away with murder. This is not their fault but society pampers them like it pampers no other group. If one of Obama's daughters ever became a teenage mother they would get torn apart by the same people who defend Bristol Palin.

[zengirl]

If one of Obama's daughters ever became a teenage mother they would get torn apart by the same people who defend Bristol Palin.

 

I totally agree with this, people can be hateful, but the solution isn't to spread opposite hate.

 

I also don't believe white women are pampered, certainly not more than white men. Straight, white men have more power than any other group, certainly, but it's receding.

[AverageJoe]

Let's not forget the women that reach that 35ish or more range that chunk up and cut all their hair off. Making them look asexual. Just compounding the fact that last egg is going to drop and then being left, wondering why.

 

Another reason I stick with the younger chics.

 

And for some of the responders here talking about "they are sluts, they are not quality" sounds like anger against your own gender because now no one wants to **** you.

[Woggle]

I totally agree with this, people can be hateful, but the solution isn't to spread opposite hate.

 

I also don't believe white women are pampered, certainly not more than white men. Straight, white men have more power than any other group, certainly, but it's receding.

 

Men do have power in many areas but in the justice system white women get away with pretty much everything. This is not to insult white women because it is not all their fault but I see it all time. Just look at that teen mom who beat her daughter's father live on the air and she still has custody and keeps getting slaps on the wrist.

[Viva]

When I posted this thread it was not my intention to offend anyone.

 

I say this because I've both skimmed and looked into detail at some of the replies left and I see that there are a few who were 'disgusted' with what was being said by other members.

 

I see some posts that made me gawk in a wtf way but it's your opinion and just because it is being said on a forum and not at home with your friends doesn't mean it's not worth hearing.

 

This is how people seriously think so I like to see what they have to say even if I don't agree with them.

 

What are we trying to explain? Isn't it basically how love works? That's why we date other people right? To see if we can love eachother, basically. You can put down all the science and math and psychological factors into it but most likely you won't get an answer that pleases all. And there may never be a 'right' answer, what we know is that we can take risks and hope for the best. You may or may not date jerks for a while but if your driven to find that one person who completes you than there you have it; you've found your 'nice' guy...or girl (I'm not saying it's easy either, things take time), and nice in my mind are the qualities that move to the rhythm of my very being. Comprende? I'm not generalizing, just explaining my view.