saiveca Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 This is mostly a question for women but feel free to respond even if you're a man. There's a guy at the office who I have very mildly flirted with. He's a really respectful man and never flirted back. We have known each other for years now and he has never crossed the line. I would say we are good friends. Nothing inappropriate ever happened between us. Friday was his last day in the office and I told him we should have coffee sometime just to catch up. He looked at me and said he'd rather not because he'd miss me too much. He then said he had feelings for me and it was best if we don't see each other. I was totally shocked! What I was unprepared for is how empty I felt after he left. I went to the ladies room and locked myself up for a long while. Is it normal to react like this because a coworker left or am I too emotional?
Jazzari Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 I'm missing something here. Is there some reason you two can't be together?
Author saiveca Posted January 8, 2011 Author Posted January 8, 2011 I'm missing something here. Is there some reason you two can't be together? Sorry, yes. I'm married and have never thought of him "that way".
mo mo Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 Sorry, yes. I'm married and have never thought of him "that way". "There's a guy at the office who I have very mildly flirted with." "Friday was his last day in the office and I told him we should have coffee sometime just to catch up."
ConflictedGuy27 Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 your marriage is very likely in trouble, OP. if you live your husband, you two should consider marital counseling.
Jazzari Posted January 8, 2011 Posted January 8, 2011 Major points to him for never trying to cross that line. And unless you want to put your marriage at risk, I think he made the correct call in not wanting to meet again. You say you never thought of him in "that way" yet you flirted with him and have an unusually strong emotional reaction to his leaving. It sounds like you might have some deeper feelings after all? I would nip this one in the bud and stay far away from temptation.
Author saiveca Posted January 9, 2011 Author Posted January 9, 2011 Honestly I don't think I would've felt like this had he left without saying anything but I guess I asked for it. I reacted so emotionally that I'm starting to wonder if I'm one of those attention seekers who will never be happy in a relationship.
ConflictedGuy27 Posted January 9, 2011 Posted January 9, 2011 Honestly I don't think I would've felt like this had he left without saying anything but I guess I asked for it. I reacted so emotionally that I'm starting to wonder if I'm one of those attention seekers who will never be happy in a relationship. you're married. may wanna focus a bit harder on it; especially when a man that isn't your husband is having such an effect. lord only knows how much more chaos you'd be dealing with if his morals were lacking. kudos to him. you should stay far away from him & figure out what's missing at home. you have strong feelings for him; obviously. best of luck.
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