dsnyfreak Posted January 7, 2011 Posted January 7, 2011 This guy and I have had sort of a thing for each other since early October. We met in one of our classes in college, and we hit it off right away. He approached me first by texting me, and we took things from there. He asked if I was single; he’s asked me to study with him multiple times; he smiles and laughs at everything I say; he teases me; and his body language gives me the clear indication that he likes me. We have a lot in common, and I have definitely made a point to let him know I have interest in him as well by complimenting him, inviting him to things, teasing him, sending flirty texts. Thing is though…NOTHING HAS HAPPENED. I seriously am getting so frustrated by the whole thing. Sometimes he’ll act like all he wants to do is be around me. At one point, I kind of found out that he quit drinking/smoking one day when we were studying in a group because a friend asked him about it when I was walking away to use the restroom, and I heard him say “because she doesn’t like it”. He’ll pull out my chair for me, and in our class, I’m the only girl who he really makes a point to talk to. Next week though, he’ll make small talk with me, but he seems disinterested. Then the cycle will repeat all over again. Now we’re home for winter break, and I included him in a mass text I sent out wishing everyone a Merry Christmas. He texted me back, and we texted for about 20 minutes before he stopped texting me. I know it was Christmas, so I know he was probably busy…whatever. But that seems like how it always goes—even when he initiates the texting. Plus, we haven’t talked at all any other time during break (I mean, we don’t live in the same area, but he’s just 45 min away). I just don’t know what he’s after honestly. Sometimes my mind can’t help but believe that it’s only for sex/hooking up. When we texted once, I was joking how streaking was on my bucket list. He said that “we should practice together sometime”. I get it…guys want sex, but I want to have something beyond that. It just seems strange. If that’s all he’s after, why is he wasting his energy on me? He knows that I’m not willing to just give it away to anyone. If that’s what he is after, he could just as easily find some other girl. My friends though, who have had to deal with the whole hookup situation numerous times already though since being at college, said it’s hard to believe that he’d be going just after that. I don’t know if maybe he’s just shy around me and thinks he’s out of my league or something (he always jokes about how smart and successful I am), and he just wants me to make the official first move. One of my friends who knew him from camp in high school said that he was pretty flirty back then, but I don’t know if he’s still the same way or could’ve changed. He’s a friendly guy around everyone, but I don’t really notice him treating other girls the way he treats me. It’s just so confusing. I don’t know what he’s after, and I have no idea how well it’s going to go over between us when we get back to school—I just hope he didn’t lose interest in me. What should I do? Thanks!
TG4MJ Posted January 7, 2011 Posted January 7, 2011 Why isn't he making a move? Is he shy or just wanting sex? Tough call, he could be intimidated by you. He could just not be sure what he wants, possibly a homo? Have you just considered just out right asking him what it is he's looking for?
WTRanger Posted January 7, 2011 Posted January 7, 2011 Why haven't you made a move yet? Answer that question and you'll have the reason why he's doing it. Sometimes guys just need a little help getting the ball rolling. So just kiss him already.
O'Malley Posted January 7, 2011 Posted January 7, 2011 Casually ask him to go to a movie/restaurant/event on a specific date and time. It's not that horrifying of an ordeal for you to ask him out instead of wringing your hands over this for the next few weeks or months. Anything other than a yes means he's not interested in dating you and just enjoys flirting.
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