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Posted (edited)

It's the usual scenario: had a first date with a girl after consistently talking by texts and on the phone which went well (met at a cafe and ended on a kiss or two) but now it's that awkward after first date stage where we suddenly aren't talking. The next day I sent her a casual message asking how she was and said I had a good time, but have not heard back since. This was 2 days ago now.

 

I also started a new job yesterday which she knew about, so I was rather hoping she would use that as an excuse to contact me. I'm therefore contemplating calling her tomorrow to arrange a possible next meeting, but does this make me seem too keen? I hate trying to master such a delicate balance, particularly after having such successful conversations with her beforehand. I'm aware she's not very confident however, but she did instigate a lot of conversations before - it was even her who asked for my number which intrigued me.

Edited by Amanaman
Posted

If you have already established a telephone relationship with her, call her and don't send any more texts. See how she handles it. If she avoids you even once, consider it over for whatever reason. Try not to take it too personally. This just seems to happen over and over again to lots of people.

Posted

I'm not sure I've experienced the awkward after-first-date experience of not talking. Surely if you're both keen, staying in touch should be pretty easy with all the means out there. Texting, phone calls, bloody Facebook, and whatever else you're communicating on.

 

If she's neglecting any form of communication after being a chatterbox before, then it looks pretty bleak to me.

 

Just don't make my fatal mistake of stewing on it, stumbling home from a pub at 1am and sending a brutal text to give the game away! I've got a habit of turning the innocent chase in to a car crash outpouring of frankness when I've had a few.

 

Either way, no point sweating on it.

  • Author
Posted

Thanks for the replies, I'll try calling tomorrow and see what happens.

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted

Well, it turns out she hadn't been feeling very well the week after we met which is fair enough, but there has still been little contact on her part since. I waited another week in the hope that she would be feeling better and tried calling, but alas no answer and no contact afterwards.

 

I don't want to seem clingy so it's her turn to get back to me as far as I'm concerned but at this point it's feeling like it's not going to happen. I just can't help but find it puzzling after the meeting seemed to go well, it was her who instigated the most interest and she made a point about being worried she was disappointing me on meeting. Disappointed and growing tired of dates ending so ambiguously!

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