Golfguy24 Posted January 3, 2011 Posted January 3, 2011 First off I am new here and just wanted to say how thankful I am to have come across this site. So here is my story, I was with my gf for about a year and this past new years day out of the blue she calls and says she wants to take break from us dating. a little bit of back story on her and I, I am 31 and she is 30, my longest relationship was 5 years back in college and up till she met me hers was 3 months so needless to say I was her longest relationship. The time we spent together was truly magical and the connection I felt, the comfort was somthing I had never experienced before. We had never even gotten into any sort of fight in the time we were together, and this was something i was no used to at all. She was perfect in every way,I had not pushed her to do anything she was not ready for in any way, I was a true gentleman towards her. With her busy afterwork schedule which keeps her busy during the week we would usually only see each other on Fri-Sun. Everything was great I went home to meet her parents which was a first for her went to weddings with her, everthing was great. I went home for Christmas and was gone a week and half and her parents came to town to be with her (she is an only child) I see her on Tuesday and then on Wednesday I get the news i have to have surgery on my elbow which I fractured back in Oct. She was off work for the week and volunteered to take me to the hospital. She was right there by my side on the day of the surgery and then the next night is new years eve and we head over to a friends house and something just did not seem right, when the ball dropped I got a passby kiss and we left shortly there after. When I got home I sent her a text asking if she was ok...no responce. The next day I get a call from her telling me she wants to take a break and that she is not in love with me and does not know how to love me. Which ever time I would tell her I loved her her response would be thank you and she would never say it back. Just hearing the words coming from her mouth were like daggers into my heart and here 2 days after surgery she leaves me when I need her the most. My Mom was devastated when I told her,she say how happy we were and does not understand why this is happening now. I just need help in understanding why this is happening now and why her fear of commitment would put knots in her stomach as she said. I am giving her the time and space she needs and I have been journaling my thoughts about this and I still cannot find an answer to why now. Any insight would be greatly appreciated as I am in this time of loss, pain and confusion.
D78 Posted January 3, 2011 Posted January 3, 2011 I'm sorry you're going through this. I don't have any insight as to why women have commitment phobia, but this thread a while back had a lot of insight: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t257327/?highlight=commitment+phobic You deserve someone who can say "I love you" instead of "thank you." I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but you do.
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