coolestmom Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 okay, here it goes............ I have a crush, yes a crush......I am a single mom in my 30's, and I have a crush! So , he knows, I told him. Not exactly sure what he thinks about it, he seems interested and all of the things he has done thus far have shown interest. I might tell you all this as well, I am very rusty at this whole dating thing. Been a very long time since I have actually had a steady boyfriend. Anyway, I see things like body language, looks, things that are said, yada yada, but I do not know what to think of what he is doing. He has my phone number which I made sure he had through a Facebook message after he was chatting with me then stopped. (was talking to his kids too) I do not know him very well, have only known him through the kids playing sports. I get the vibe he is interested and some of the things I have seen makes me think so, but I do also know men can be very devious and sly too. I am sort of old fashioned with the whole "guy asks girls out" thing and I have done the friend requesting and the phone number giving. I do not know a lot about him. I know his marriage failed and I do know somewhat that it was because SHE apparently cheated. Not sure where this crush came from, a few months ago, he was just another guy and now I am seeing him differently now. Seems like a very nice guy and he is very quiet which makes me wonder if maybe he is just kind of shy when it comes to this stuff??? So, these are the details I can come up with now. Just want some thoughts or advice on the situation.
Surrealist Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 Careful...... I'm the quiet shy nice-guy type and there's been a few older middle-aged women at my work who have grossly mistaken my niceness as a sign of interest when nothing of sort was even remotely close to the truth! It was and is actually very annoying for me when women do this to the point of 'creepy' especially given the workplace. I strongly suggest you let HIM initiate the next contact!! That way you'll know there is some interest on his part and him not just being nice and responding to you out of politeness and courtesy.
USCGAviator Posted January 2, 2011 Posted January 2, 2011 You did your part in telling him you have a crush. Now sit back be friendly to him and send out the vibe. If hes interested he will pursue you.
Author coolestmom Posted January 3, 2011 Author Posted January 3, 2011 (edited) I was actually thinking I would do exactly what USCG has said! In fact, I am. I am going to put my "crush" feelings aside and just let it subside. If I get over it and nothing more ever comes from it, then obviously he was not meant for me and he really had no interest. I just get the body language thing and everything else, it just seems like maybe he is, but I cannot worry about that. I will just go on and if he leaps, I will gladly allow him. As for his niceness and me misconstruing it, I never ever really noticed him before, even after I knew he and his ex were split. I had a friend point him out to me and I had already sort of developed something at that time anyway. I did not develop it from his being nice, trust me, I am not that naive. Thanks USCG, I am going to do exactly as you have said and hope and pray his looks and his body language don't con me into thinking there *may be* something there.......... Edited January 3, 2011 by coolestmom grammatical error
colliejoanie Posted January 3, 2011 Posted January 3, 2011 Careful...... I'm the quiet shy nice-guy type and there's been a few older middle-aged women at my work who have grossly mistaken my niceness as a sign of interest when nothing of sort was even remotely close to the truth! It was and is actually very annoying for me when women do this to the point of 'creepy' especially given the workplace. I strongly suggest you let HIM initiate the next contact!! That way you'll know there is some interest on his part and him not just being nice and responding to you out of politeness and courtesy. And by OLDER MIDDLE-AGED women, you mean 50's right......NOT 30's? I agree. You've done your part. He'll come running if he's interested (speaking as a 30 something single mom, who recently forgot the definition of dignity, and feels really stupid because of it).
Ms. Joolie Posted January 3, 2011 Posted January 3, 2011 Ooo how exciting! We're rooting for you, coolestmom! You know, if down the line he doesn't see the light and ask you out you could totally flirt with him for fun and not expect anything of it.
br0ken_w0lf Posted January 3, 2011 Posted January 3, 2011 As others have said, not to worry. Even us quiet/shy guys will let you know if we're interested Also, don't forget, if the info about his marriage is correct, he may be a little gun-shy for several reasons (ask me how I know ) - so he may take a bit longer to approach you if he's indeed interested.
Author coolestmom Posted January 3, 2011 Author Posted January 3, 2011 And by OLDER MIDDLE-AGED women, you mean 50's right......NOT 30's? I agree. You've done your part. He'll come running if he's interested (speaking as a 30 something single mom, who recently forgot the definition of dignity, and feels really stupid because of it). Awww Joanie, I too have forgotten about dignity at times. It shows in my past dating experiences too!!! And everyone has been absolutely right about this, letting lie for now and if he is interested, he will make his move, if not, then it wasn't meant for me. And yeah, I did get a little insulted by the "middle aged women" thing.........since when is 37 middle-aged??????? Sounds like someone has a little issue there...........
Author coolestmom Posted January 3, 2011 Author Posted January 3, 2011 As others have said, not to worry. Even us quiet/shy guys will let you know if we're interested Also, don't forget, if the info about his marriage is correct, he may be a little gun-shy for several reasons (ask me how I know ) - so he may take a bit longer to approach you if he's indeed interested. The "gun shy" thing was another thought too. As far as I know, it is true, but you never know. My experience being in a small town has always told me "do not believe all you hear until you hear it from the source, and even then it may be misconstrued" I am just going to bide my time and hopefully he gets hooked I deserve a good man but I am not going to chase one. Then I look desperate or even crazy.
Author coolestmom Posted January 3, 2011 Author Posted January 3, 2011 Ooo how exciting! We're rooting for you, coolestmom! You know, if down the line he doesn't see the light and ask you out you could totally flirt with him for fun and not expect anything of it. I do flirt to a point when I see him at my work. If I am at the other places we end up at the same time, I too shy away from saying anything or even making eye contact. I am not really a shy person when it comes to people in general, but this one gets my nerves going, but in a good way!!! Another thought for everyone, I did catch him doing what I thought was looking at me as I walked by and he was entering a room, but it could just be me getting my hopes up! Just sayin'!!!........
Author coolestmom Posted January 6, 2011 Author Posted January 6, 2011 Okay, so I got nothing, haven't had the right timing to even see this guy lately. Not giving up necessarily, just not going to worry about it anymore. If it is meant to be, it will happen
Recommended Posts