no_clue Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Im trying to start a relationship with this girl that likes me she is really pretty and im average kind of shy and nervous. She wants a ltr and i do to. I hung out with her the other day she invited me to come over and sit in my car while she snuck out for a little while. I was pretty drunk before she invited me and even though we made out i was silent and awkward, after that day she started sending mixed signals not sending as many texts or stopped calling me pet names until the point i have to text or call first she said she wants to get to know me better b4 a serious relationship and that everything was happening to fast, i am wondering if shes losing interest in me or if she just wants to take it slower. we have pretty good chemistry and have alot of things in common for awhile i could feel the love heating up now it feels the spark is gone, should i be worried shes talking to other guys or play it cool? im not very experienced in relationships yet whats going on?
Yer_Blues Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Being silent and awkward is not something women appreciate too often, unfortunately. That's passive behavior, and they have the corner on that market.
Author no_clue Posted December 31, 2010 Author Posted December 31, 2010 Well what should i do? women always give me that look in the eye but im so shy i can never approach them. ive passed up so many pretty girls that liked me in my life because i was to damn nervous i feel like ill never change i have no problem socializing with guys and girls that are friends and i can be quite funny and loud but when it comes to girls i like i hardly have nothing to say around them and my mind is to busy running in circles trying to figure what to do that i just freeze up and look dumb girls usually think im really cool n handsome until they find out im so shy it becomes distant and weird i think.
youngskywalker Posted January 1, 2011 Posted January 1, 2011 Well what should i do? You go for it... with everything you got, like you've never gone for something in your life. Trust me on this one. If it doesn't work out then you'll look back and say, "it's not my fault, and at least I gave it a shot". There is nothing worse in life than looking back and saying 'I wish I would have'. The worst situations in the world of love is the 'what if's'. So if you like a girl, make her your girl. You get that? MAKE her your girl. If she passes then move on to the next fortunate one to be worthy of your love and adoration. It's not rocket science. Be a freaking man. Good Luck my friend.
Author no_clue Posted January 1, 2011 Author Posted January 1, 2011 idk i think i might be overreacting because we havent got to know each other that good and its still early i just cant stop thinking about her, i just feel that she might like me now but when we actually hang out ill be really boring i always avoided hanging out with girls unless we were with a group of friends. im cool to hang out with friends but i feel like i might freeze up on dates im so nervous around girls that i like
Yer_Blues Posted January 1, 2011 Posted January 1, 2011 (edited) idk i think i might be overreacting because we havent got to know each other that good and its still early i just cant stop thinking about her, i just feel that she might like me now but when we actually hang out ill be really boring i always avoided hanging out with girls unless we were with a group of friends. im cool to hang out with friends but i feel like i might freeze up on dates im so nervous around girls that i like The more you worry about freezing up and the more you worry about the potential implications of freezing up, the less focused you will be on revealing yourself and having a good time. It's funny for me to even try to give advice to somebody on this issue, as I have struggled for a while now with social phobia, but you have to stop worrying about how she will see you. When you are with her, stay in the moment and try not to read too much into things. If you can keep your mind from racing off all over the place and stay calm and focused only on what is actually happening and refrain from analysis, the results will be better. The MJ makes it way more difficult to not become absorbed in thought and analysis, so consider avoiding that when you have to interact with this girl. It's easier said than done. I'm being quite literal too, you actually want to calm your thinking brain down. Pay attention only to external stimuli and the demands they have for you, such as listening to her and then interacting with her. If you allow you're mind to race in circles, you won't be able to listen to her properly and will probably be overly silent and held down by the nervousness you are feeling. Edited January 1, 2011 by Yer_Blues
Author no_clue Posted January 1, 2011 Author Posted January 1, 2011 Yeah the weed makes my thinking clouded thats probably why i messed up is because when we hung out i smoked some high grade with her and was drunk but i think your idea makes sense i will try it. Now im wondering what to do she hasnt really been contacting me should i give it a few days til she contacts me or should i call her or text her i was thinking about calling her and asking what was going on between us and if shes still interested in hanging out and starting a relationship should i wait or go for it shes the only thing holding me back from moving out of this god forsaken state. She went to a party last night and was supposed to be on house arrest, around xmas she was talking about how she couldnt wait to hang out starting sunday when she got off house arrest but she already went to a party im afraid she might be trying to get with other guys still since she doesnt talk to me as much what should i do should i ask if shes talking to other dudes and whats going on between us or just engage in small talk again
Author no_clue Posted January 2, 2011 Author Posted January 2, 2011 Well since noone wants to give me a hand i took the initiative myself to call her and i guess i was overreacting with my whole long stupid stories because she was enthusiastic about telling me something and when i asked if she wanted to hang out when she got off house arrest she said yes gladly. I regret that i did text to ask why she hasnt been texting as much and if she was talking to someone else already and she just said shes been asleep all day so idk if thats a bad sign, and i meant the past few days. I just stopped texting after that. I guess she thinks we are close enough that she doesnt need to text me as much even though most girls are constantly texting, that or shes losing interest idk im going to let it play out.
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