Is she into me?

[Kachunk]

So about 4 months since my now ex-wife left me, but despite that I'm loving life and back in the dating scene, but I'm totally frustrated and confused.

 

Here it goes, I'm back in school and having a blast, this girl in my class for most of the last semester has been eyeing me and I've been eyeing back, now being out of the dating scene for some 7 years I never thought she might like me so I just carried on with school and even so I wasn't ready to date just yet.

Now about 2.5 weeks ago after I had already decided I was ready to start seeing people this girl starts to really step up the eye contact in class so I figured I had the hots for her so I started chatting with her on Facebook chat and she was totally into me and to my surprise we had some cool things in common despite being 8 years apart in age (me 30, her 22). After 2 nights chatting with her I invited her and her friend to study with my small group of friends and she said that would be great and thats where things all started.I ended up getting invited along with her friend and her friends guy friend kind of like a double date to hang out have dinner and drink some wine at this house they were house sitting, it ended up being a fantastic night! We made out and cuddled on the sofa watching a movie and ended up sleeping in the same bed (nothing happened). From there this girl and her friend invited me to go with them down south for a week right after Xmas (this week actually) but the flight was cancelled, but still I was invited which was super cool despite only having known them for a few days!

I end up texting, FB chatting and hang out with this girl for a few days in a row and we are totally hitting it off, her friend said she was into me and life was really just great! Despite all this great stuff I felt like I wasn't getting through to her like she was only giving so much of herself and that might have been pushing her too much, I texted her after I felt like I might be too pushy to want to hang with her all the time (I was worried being new to the dating scene made me rusty on this whole thing) but she assured me she wants to hang out with me just as much which was reassuring. She ended up spending the night at my place one night after a night of watching movies (same bed, but nothing) and I almost ended up staying at her place one night, but I couldn't stay over since I have dogs at home, but she wanted me to stay over. Christmas came along and she went to see her family for a few days but she made a point of keeping in touch with me, we chatted/texted each night and there was certainly some flirting going on and some innocent teasing back and forth. Come boxing day which was the day before we were to fly down south the 3 of us (me, her and her friend) go together at this other persons cottage to spend the night before driving the airport early the next morning, we got into the wine and then found out the flight was cancelled, BUMMER! anyways long story short we stayed the night, sleep in the same bed again, but her friend had turned the heat up crazy hot so I was boiling in bed that night! and I know I was being annoying being all hot and keep trying to figure out how to turn down the heat, I got up 3x to try to figure out the complicated heating system, I just couldn't help myself it was soooo uncomfortable and the next morning she made a point of saying I was being a little annoying. So now Im thinking I just burned myself, what an idiot.

The next day I thought of being the nice guy since we were all depressed about being stuck home and not on a nice hot beach so I took the 2 girls out to a nice restaurant, my treat, it was an expensive dinner, but it was a good time. Her friend thanked me numerous times for dinner, but this girl as far as I can remember never thanked me and from then on all this frustrating **** started to happen. I texted her friend to ask her whats going on, does she like me or not cause things just don't feel right anymore, she told me "she is into you, but has a wall up because of what happened in her past" and she assured me to just be patient and let her come to me. Sounds simple enough.

Back track to the dinner, when I dropped her off she asked if we could hang out the next day, I told her I had to see family for part of the day, but that I would text her when I'm home, great she said. The next day I text her at like 3 to say "I'm heading home whats up? want to see a movie tonight" her reply "actually I have plans with the girls maybe movie another night, but I shouldnt be late, we can hang out after?". I never heard from her that night and the next day this being yesterday actually I text her " how was last night?" she texts to say some 2hrs later" so sorry about last night" turns out they were out drinking all night and she slept in till 2. Said she was feeling really lousy and went back to bed, would text me later. SHe text me later (now I did send her a text before about something else unrelated so I did initiate it) and we texted back and forth about her night and that she was feeling a head cold coming on, I mentioned twice in my texted about hanging out and she never acknowledged it and kept the subject away from hanging out. If she didn;t want to hang out Im cool with that, but she didn't say that.

 

Now today I said to myself I won't text her and just let her make the first contact and eventually this evening at 7ish she messaged me on Facebook, "hey whats going on?" I had to go so I could only chat for 5 mins and told her I would text her when Im back, she said ok cool. I get home 1hr later, text her, but Im not really getting anything in return, just simple small talk like texts, not the usual texts I get from her and then I see on her Facebook (hate facebook) that she is "off to see a movie". Honestly I felt burned since I asked her to a movie on Tuesday and she said another night and now she is going without me, I know "suck it up", but I can't help it.

 

So thats my deal. Everything seemed to be going great until after the dinner out. Now what do you all think?

Is she into me, but dialing things down and just taking it slower?

Shes into me, but doesn't want to get hurt herself and is hesitant to push forward?

Maybe its just coincidence that the last few days were the way they are?

Or maybe its just that I haven't been single for 7 years and have totally forgotten how this dating thing works and have become unnecessarily worried about everything because I don't want to get hurt again?

I keep thinking "dude just relax and let her come to you, don't get all bent out of shape over little things"

 

Thoughts?

[USMCHokie]

Thoughts?

 

(1) PARAGRAPHS...I am feeling generous tonight, so I decided to still read it...

 

(2) Stop texting so much...you can't convey context, and it takes forever to say what you could say in 5 minutes with a phone call...you said that she didn't acknowledge you asking if she wanted to hang out with you...? That wouldn't have been a problem if you had called...

 

(3) Holidays can do crazy sh*t to dating situations and relationships...

 

(4) You may be 7 years out of the game, but dating can be as simple as you want to make it. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. Boy goes out with girl. Easy.

 

(5) Stop texting. I have a feeling a lot of the issues you described wouldn't have even come up if you had more real talking...

[Kachunk]

I totally agree on the texting, but she's a big texter and BBM'er so I'm trying to play to her liking. I'll try to see if I can call her a few times.

 

I'll edit some paragraphs in...Ok apparently I cannot edit it anymore.

Edited December 31, 2010 by Kachunk