lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Well two days away till the New Year. For some reason I have this girl on my mind I dated over a month ago for several weeks or more. Things faded and now we haven't talked in awhile. We didn't even say goodbye to each other or anything like that and I think is sucks big time. I think about her everyday and would love to keep in contact. Important to note that as of now this fling is now water over the damn. I'm pretty sure, but not positive she is gone. But you never know right? Would it be the worst thing to just call her up and wish her a happy new year? Most likely it will go to voicemail but I could leave a message just wishing her the best. I'm a pretty prideful guy sometimes and I'd be swallowing a lot of it with doing this. I also don't want to come across as a sap by doing this but this girl meant a lot to me but for whatever reason I wasn't able to keep it going. Sucks to be me. Do you think this is a good way to hopefully leave the door open for the future or what? Maybe I'm making way to big of a deal about it. How about a little "go for it" from the cheer section at LS. LOL.
beachgirll2011 Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 I always hear from guys I used to date and it doesn't bother me And you never know!!!!!! Just make sure you are real upbeat when you call and ask what she is doing for NYE...if you want to see her just ask her if she wants to get together for a drink or something Tell her something cute like you need someone to kiss at midnight I would be a sucker for a line like that!!!!! But DEF call...or txt...actually sometimes txt is better bc it doesn't put her on the spot.
Karma20 Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 I would contact her, you never know what could happen. Better to find out then wonder "what if"
mr.dream merchant Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Learned the hard way, if you had some form of relationship with a woman, and things faded to no communication between the both of you, then just let it be. All the cutesy little texts and happy holiday wishings...all that BS is for the birds. If she wanted to talk to you she would be talking to you right now. Sorry if this came off kind of harsh, but it's just the reality of your situation. But there's always exceptions to everything, just don't hold yourself back hoping for the best. Get out there and get a move on, you've got nowhere but "up" to go.
Author lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 I always hear from guys I used to date and it doesn't bother me And you never know!!!!!! Just make sure you are real upbeat when you call and ask what she is doing for NYEBut DEF call...or txt...actually sometimes txt is better bc it doesn't put her on the spot. Yeah I always hear from girls I used to date also, or they hear from me. 80% of the time one of us gets in contact down the road.. never turns into anything though. Anyway, I'm not calling her until New Years Day. This isn't an ask her out on a date thing... it's simply a trying to keep in contact thing, wishing her the best. I just want to let her know I'm ok with keeping in contact and being friends if that's how she wants it.
SmileFace Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Haha I think people just wait for the Holiday time to rekindle pass relationships. I recieved about four Merry Christmas texts from guys who just fizzled out my life. Anyway , you know never know.A text won't hurt anyone . I personally wouldn't do it . Only because if something fizzled out once - it is bond to happen again. Be aware, I am not the most optimistic person
beachgirll2011 Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Just to let you know i think the other posts are from guys? That's good advice but if it was me I wouldn't mind and sometimes you never know. If anything you could meet up after the holidays and have a good time. Although I agree if the connection isn't there to keep it going it usually means it won't work. but again you never know!!!
Author lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 Learned the hard way, if you had some form of relationship with a woman, and things faded to no communication between the both of you, then just let it be. All the cutesy little texts and happy holiday wishings...all that BS is for the birds. If she wanted to talk to you she would be talking to you right now. Sorry if this came off kind of harsh, but it's just the reality of your situation. But there's always exceptions to everything, just don't hold yourself back hoping for the best. Get out there and get a move on, you've got nowhere but "up" to go. Yes Sir, you speak the truth. That's my experience too but like you said there is always exceptions. I was seriously broken up over this girl but have moved on. As a matter of fact I have a date with another girl I'm interested in tonight! I'm moving on but just trying to keep my options open. I'd also be willing to be friends with this girl but you can't push friendship either. I'm just being nice so if she steps on me then it's her bad.
Author lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 if the connection isn't there to keep it going it usually means it won't work. but again you never know!!! That's the really F-ed up part. The connecting was there for the first few weeks. Then... who knows what happened. I'm not going to elaborate on it or waste my time. I just wanted to know if girls mind receiving a little voice mail wishing them the best. I think you answered that. Thanks.
USMCHokie Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Would it be the worst thing to just call her up and wish her a happy new year? What would be the benefit of doing this? What are you hoping to accomplish by attempting to contact her? If you truly have no alterior motive, then just pick a random name in the phone book and say Happy New Year to them instead. You'd essentially be doing the same thing. Otherwise, leave it be and enjoy your NYE.
mr.dream merchant Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Yes Sir, you speak the truth. That's my experience too but like you said there is always exceptions. I was seriously broken up over this girl but have moved on. As a matter of fact I have a date with another girl I'm interested in tonight! I'm moving on but just trying to keep my options open. I'd also be willing to be friends with this girl but you can't push friendship either. I'm just being nice so if she steps on me then it's her bad. Do you truly believe that you're capable of being just friends with a woman you were/are interested in romantically? If not, don't contact her. If yes, don't contact her lol..
ecm Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Need more info, plz...how did it end? You just literally stopped talking?
Author lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 Need more info, plz...how did it end? You just literally stopped talking? Umm there is a bit of drama involved to be honest. We went on a few great dates at first then it turned into a lot of talking on the phone (every few days) and texting every day. She always made excuses of why she couldn't hook up in person but showed interest otherwise. I got fed up and said let's just be friends. She said fine. After a couple weeks I came back and said I still wanted her. She said she wasn't ready to label the relationship. I asked her out one more time on a random night and she couldn't make it because of work. We both texted ttyl. That was a month ago and neither one of us made another attempt. Yeah I know, she isn't interested. It's not the point of this post lol. To the guys above- At this point I do think I could be just friends because I'm interested in another girl. And, I do realize it's a lost cause... but every now and then you do meet someone who you'd like to keep in contact with ya know. Maybe you just need to come beat the crap out of me. What dark ally should we meet in haha.
Jannah Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 Umm there is a bit of drama involved to be honest. We went on a few great dates at first then it turned into a lot of talking on the phone (every few days) and texting every day. She always made excuses of why she couldn't hook up in person but showed interest otherwise. I got fed up and said let's just be friends. She said fine. After a couple weeks I came back and said I still wanted her. She said she wasn't ready to label the relationship. I asked her out one more time on a random night and she couldn't make it because of work. We both texted ttyl. That was a month ago and neither one of us made another attempt. Yeah I know, she isn't interested. It's not the point of this post lol. To the guys above- At this point I do think I could be just friends because I'm interested in another girl. And, I do realize it's a lost cause... but every now and then you do meet someone who you'd like to keep in contact with ya know. Maybe you just need to come beat the crap out of me. What dark ally should we meet in haha. See above font in bold/underline.
Author lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 See above font in bold/underline. I didn't want this to go off into a tangent from the original post. If we were still talking I wouldn't have to ask the question in the first place. This is simply a question of keeping in contact with someone from time to time. I guess some people do, some don't. Works for some, most not.
Jannah Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 I didn't want this to go off into a tangent from the original post. If we were still talking I wouldn't have to ask the question in the first place. This is simply a question of keeping in contact with someone from time to time. I guess some people do, some don't. Works for some, most not. Okay, gotcha. My apologies. Well putting it like that ^^, then I guess there's no harm in it.
Author lovebitme Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 Well putting it like that ^^, then I guess there's no harm in it. That's kinda my thought too. It's one of those instances where I'd like to leave the door open for the future. But, if you never make contact period there there isn't a possibility of that, right? It's not like I'm even going to ask her out or say hey give me a call back. Just a short message, that's it.
Jannah Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 That's kinda my thought too. It's one of those instances where I'd like to leave the door open for the future. But, if you never make contact period there there isn't a possibility of that, right? It's not like I'm even going to ask her out or say hey give me a call back. Just a short message, that's it. Yes I see what you are saying. I've gotten those type of messages once in a blue moon, have sent a few myself. No harm in it. Nothing ever came from it, but then again, I suppose it wasn't meant to.
ecm Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 If she doesn't respond, will it affect you? If not, then I'd say go ahead. If you're pretty much over her/it, it's a nice thought. If you think it will send you into a back-spin or something, I'd suggest against it.
Star Gazer Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 If she wanted to talk to you she would be talking to you right now. Doesn't this go both ways? If he wanted to talk to her he would be talking to her right now? Sounds like the OP is the one who let communication fade to begin with, so it stands to reason that he's the one who needs to pick it back up.
Distant78 Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Doesn't this go both ways? If he wanted to talk to her he would be talking to her right now? Sounds like the OP is the one who let communication fade to begin with, so it stands to reason that he's the one who needs to pick it back up. No she's the one who was shady. But at this point, it doesn't matter now. He needs to move on and find someone who really likes him.
youngskywalker Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Doesn't this go both ways? If he wanted to talk to her he would be talking to her right now? Sounds like the OP is the one who let communication fade to begin with, so it stands to reason that he's the one who needs to pick it back up. Someone finally said it! Yes, maybe I'm the one who should be talking to her right now. Maybe she's thinking 'why didn't that guy ever contact me again?' I was the one who let the communication fade, well we both did TBH. But, she was the one who was shady so I started to begin the backing off process. It's a messed up situation. I still don't know what I'm going to do. Like I said I'm not calling her to ask her out. I don't think I would want to date her anyway, but I really did enjoy her short lived companionship. I just want to give her a little poke to see if she's alive.
USMCHokie Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 I was the one who let the communication fade, well we both did TBH. But, she was the one who was shady so I started to begin the backing off process. Actions will always speak louder than words. I don't know what words could be more clear... It's a messed up situation. I still don't know what I'm going to do. Like I said I'm not calling her to ask her out. I don't think I would want to date her anyway, but I really did enjoy her short lived companionship. I just want to give her a little poke to see if she's alive. It doesn't sound all that messed up at all. She didn't act like she was interested. Life goes on.
Star Gazer Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Actions will always speak louder than words. I don't know what words could be more clear... What do you mean by this? She was acting disinterested. That's "shady"? And then he told her he just wanted to be friends. She said fine. Then he backpeddled.
USMCHokie Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 What do you mean by this? She was acting disinterested. That's "shady"? And then he told her he just wanted to be friends. She said fine. Then he backpeddled. In the context of the quoted post, I took "shady" to mean wishy washy as far as her interest in him.
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