aimeeg Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 I am 17 years old (please don't judge on my age, I'm very mature for my age and know what I want) and me and my boyfriend have been together for a little over a year. At the beginning, I was madly in love with him. We had so much passion, so much love, and so much happiness. We spend SO MUCH time together, which I think is finally catching up to us.. Anyways, at four months into our relationship, we started having sex. That month, I went on birth control. Five months later (eight months into the relationship) I got off of birth control, since I lost all sex drive, had mood swings, and was very topsy turby about how I felt with my boyfriend. Three weeks later, I felt back to normal so I went on another birth control pill (mind you this pill had twice the amount of estrogen in it, bad decision). A week and a half later, I had a panic attack and immediately stopped taking the pills. It's been four months since I've been on birth control and I still feel the same way (no sex drive AT ALL, mood swings, very confused about how I feel about my boyfriend). Let me tell you that my boyfriend is absolutely perfect. He's a gentleman in all aspects and has never done a thing to hurt me. He is seriously the best and perfect. I'm scared that I've fallen out of love with him and don't know how to fix things. I don't want to break up, so please don't tell me that option. PLEASE HELP!!
Cracker Jack Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 Um, well, I have to be honest--no one here can help you fall back in love with your boyfriend; that's really something you have to do, if it's possible to begin with. I mean, you listed all of his pro's, so it sounds like he's a good guy. Apparently there's nothing he can do at this point if he's as spot-on as you believe. So with that, you just have to search yourself and wonder why you're so confused about your relationship with someone's who's "the best and perfect" towards you. I'm not looking to bring up your age, but as mature as you can be at 17, you're still young, so perhaps you really don't know what you want.
NeoGen85 Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 Um, well, I have to be honest--no one here can help you fall back in love with your boyfriend; that's really something you have to do, if it's possible to begin with. I mean, you listed all of his pro's, so it sounds like he's a good guy. Apparently there's nothing he can do at this point if he's as spot-on as you believe. So with that, you just have to search yourself and wonder why you're so confused about your relationship with someone's who's "the best and perfect" towards you. I'm not looking to bring up your age, but as mature as you can be at 17, you're still young, so perhaps you really don't know what you want. He's exactly right. I dated a girl who was 5 years younger then myself and it was great in the beginning. But towards the end of our relationship it was obvious that she didn't know what she wanted. She began to really show her age, and I began to see the 5 year difference. She eventually broke it off, claiming that she had no idea why. When your young it is easy to fall in and out of love. When I was 17 the word "love" was used so loosely. Just like Dave Chapelle said; "I was just trying to finger f!ck people all day at that age".
welikeincrowds Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 It's funny that you mention birth control and so on because this definitely sounds hormonal. know what I want Great, then you should be able to answer that question. What do you want, exactly?
Author aimeeg Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 It's funny that you mention birth control and so on because this definitely sounds hormonal. Great, then you should be able to answer that question. What do you want, exactly? I'm an idiot, I don't know what I said I know what I want, because clearly I have no idea.
forrest Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 you might still be seeing the effects of the birth control pill. Might be a good time to schedule a visit with your doc and see if that is the cause.
Author aimeeg Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 you might still be seeing the effects of the birth control pill. Might be a good time to schedule a visit with your doc and see if that is the cause. I actually did, I went last week because I think I might have hormonal imbalance. So now I'm waiting for my results.
Seamless74 Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 how bout using condoms?? or like getting that shot, or maybe even a dental dam lol...
Author aimeeg Posted December 30, 2010 Author Posted December 30, 2010 how bout using condoms?? or like getting that shot, or maybe even a dental dam lol... We use condoms even when I am on the pill. I'm seventeen, I take extra precautions every time.
kiss_andmakeup Posted December 30, 2010 Posted December 30, 2010 See my response to your other similar thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t253946/ Regardless of your maturity (and I considered myself rather mature for my age at 17 as well), 17 is sometimes just too young to really know who and what you want. You are just scratching the surface of adulthood and mapping out who you want to be and what you want to do. It's natural that the qualities you're attracted to in a mate will start to change a little bit, even if it is subconscious at the moment. I'm not saying this absolutely isn't the guy you'll marry and spend the rest of your life with, just saying that it's not likely. And that's okay.
Akumark Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 I could be really wrong on that one but I'll say it, maybe he's such a ''good guy'' you wanna go out with him, but he's not enough of the ''bad boy'' you wanna sleep with.
Author aimeeg Posted December 31, 2010 Author Posted December 31, 2010 I could be really wrong on that one but I'll say it, maybe he's such a ''good guy'' you wanna go out with him, but he's not enough of the ''bad boy'' you wanna sleep with. I was actually thinking about that.. But how does one turn into a "bad boy"?
ecm Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 I just had a conversation with my best friend today about this. Last Christmas, she was home to visit and was obviously unhappy. She has a great job, great husband, great home, financially set, etc. They had been trying to get pregnant for about 5 years. Now, one year later, they've adopted a beautiful baby. I asked her about how things are going; if she was still having doubts about her marriage, etc. She said everything was great, and that the stress of trying to get pregnant was making her doubt her feelings/ happiness. Now, your situation is a little different but it's the same story. You may very well have found the one. If so, you're pretty lucky to have found him at such a young age. Every minute is not going to be all "sparks and butterflies". They come and go. You might not always want to jump him or always feel butterflies/ get an adrenaline rush when he enters the room. That doesn't mean you're not in love with him I wish I would've believed people when they told me that when I was younger. It's the truth. He may NOT be "the one". But whoever you're with... the situation will be the same. In my opinion, anyway. Butterflies are fun, but having that best friend who you know has your back no matter what is BETTER
TheWatcher Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Let me tell you that my boyfriend is absolutely perfect. He's a gentleman in all aspects and has never done a thing to hurt me. He is seriously the best and perfect. I'm scared that I've fallen out of love with him and don't know how to fix things. I don't want to break up, so please don't tell me that option. PLEASE HELP!! I think that you might be getting bored of your boyfriend because he's too nice ? Young women (especially around your age;even older women) are very attracted to the bad boy/jerk.I'm not saying that you or other women are saying "You know,I'd really like a guy to disrespect me..treat me like dirt & totally disregard my feelings" I think that some women are attracted to the confidence & extreme levels of self-esteem,unpredictability that the bad boy exemplifies. You asked how does one become a bad boy ? By being aloof,showing disinterest when around his partner,not showing any signs of eagerness, calling/texting very seldom as opposed to once/twice a day,etc... Good Luck
that girl Posted December 31, 2010 Posted December 31, 2010 Forget the bad boy stuff, I think the issue is the pill. Do you enjoy sleeping with him? Clearly your sex drive is effected by the pill but do you enjoy the sex, do you climax? Do you feel pressured to sleep with him? (Sometimes nice 17 year old boys can be thoughtless)
Author aimeeg Posted December 31, 2010 Author Posted December 31, 2010 Forget the bad boy stuff, I think the issue is the pill. Do you enjoy sleeping with him? Clearly your sex drive is effected by the pill but do you enjoy the sex, do you climax? Do you feel pressured to sleep with him? (Sometimes nice 17 year old boys can be thoughtless) I do and I don't. I love making him happy but I never have fully "enjoyed" sex. Oral makes me orgasm, but vaginal intercourse doesn't really do it for me. I'm one of the women in the world that doesn't really enjoy sex and I've learned to accept it. I'm not pressured into doing it. Also, I've tried pleasuring myself and it doesn't really do it for me either, and I had an ex boyfriend who I didn't get much pleasure from either.. So I don't think it's my boyfriend.
Author aimeeg Posted January 7, 2011 Author Posted January 7, 2011 Any updates as to your situation? unfortunately no :/ my gyno was supposed to call me back LAST MONDAY and i still haven't received a call. i also called twice and left voicemails.. i'm angry at this point. but hopefully i will have a callback soon and know what happened. also, i am not on nuvaring, i've had it in since sunday. i haven't gotten worse so that's good
Allisha Posted January 7, 2011 Posted January 7, 2011 We use condoms even when I am on the pill. I'm seventeen, I take extra precautions every time. Smart girl
Recommended Posts