atmosphere Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 I met someone on an online dating site. We get along so well, we talk loads when we meet and laugh together a lot - he constantly tells me that I make him laugh. Each meeting has lasted between 5 - 10 hours depending on the time of day. But there's absolutly nothing, there's no kiss at the night, always just a hug. We've now met 4 times and apart from the first meet, they've all been initiated by him. So this is my dilema. What do I do? If this was any other way of meeting someone apart from a "dating" site I'd be more accepting that this is just friendship etc, but why keep asking to meet me if he doesn't like me like that? And then he makes comments like "its not like me and you where we're seeing each other" when I asked him about the other girls he's met online. I just feel really confused and quite horrible about this whole situation. I'm happy to be his friend, but why not say that instead of making me think that each meeting is a date.
somedude81 Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 Since you met on a dating site and have went out several times. Here's my theory, he likes you but he's a little shy in making a real move.
ecm Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 Maybe he's "old fashioned". Why don't you ask him?
Author atmosphere Posted December 29, 2010 Author Posted December 29, 2010 Maybe he's "old fashioned". Why don't you ask him? Because that would be embarassing and seems so young. I kinda want it all to happy organically without any sort of engineering on my part. It's just very confusing because evrry time at the end of the night hes straight in there with the hug, theres never any sort of indiciation oooo maybe I'm shy so this is why I'm doing it. And it confuses me much that he's so confident when it comes to pretty much everything else but then with this he's shy. I don't know, something aboutt hat doesn't read properly to me.
somedude81 Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 evrry time at the end of the night hes straight in there with the hug, theres never any sort of indiciation oooo maybe I'm shy so this is why I'm doing it. And it confuses me much that he's so confident when it comes to pretty much everything else but then with this he's shy. I don't know, something aboutt hat doesn't read properly to me. For some men, trying to kiss a girl can be seen as a huge risk. It shows that they really like somebody. If a kiss is rejected, it can be a painful blow. If you want to move things along with this guy, my suggestion is to try and give him signals that you want him to kiss you. Hopefully he'll figure it out and make a move.
BackUpOrGetStung Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 "I kinda want it all to happy organically without any sort of engineering on my part." You realize that by joining a dating site, you are indeed, engineering things, in a very inorganic way..don't you?
Author atmosphere Posted December 29, 2010 Author Posted December 29, 2010 For some men, trying to kiss a girl can be seen as a huge risk. It shows that they really like somebody. If a kiss is rejected, it can be a painful blow. If you want to move things along with this guy, my suggestion is to try and give him signals that you want him to kiss you. Hopefully he'll figure it out and make a move. Like what? I do the whole touchy feely thing, but obviously isn't working. There isn't a chance for any of that whole lean in slow stuff because he hugs straight away! There's no pause! He's not a very flirty person and I don't know whether hes not very flirty normally or if he's just not flirty with me. If it wasn't for little comments he keeps making then I would be convinced that I've been put into the friendship box, but then he says something and I think maybe not. It's just very conflicting signs I get from him. You realize that by joining a dating site, you are indeed, engineering things, in a very inorganic way..don't you? LOL, yes I totally understand that. Which plays a huge part in why I want the rest of whatever "this" is to feel as natural as possible. It still feels strange to be using online sites and now that I finally meet someone who I really like I want it to be like and feel like all the other relationships I've gone into that consisted of a more conventional way of meeting.
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