49willys Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 here i go i will tell everything we meet in high school and have a had a good marriage and a good life tell the first wich was about 6 years in to are marriage she cheated she said she didnt but i found a letter she wrote him that said she want more with him and take care of his kids so i got mad and we fought and then she was talking to a ex boyfriend also so i said **** this and started cheating to with a girl and we decided to divorce each others but we have two kids but i moved out and did not pay her any attion and just spent my time with this new girl i meet then me and my wife went to talk and fill out the pappers on the divorce and she begged for a 2nd chance so we both promised to not cheat again and be more open with each other but by now we sold our nice house and split the money to pay all the bills and cards off and paid the cars off but we mannaged and found a new place and evey thing went well for 2 years then i found out she was talking to her ex again that we both promised we would not do so i took it as cheating cause she hide it from me also so once again we talked it out and i gave other chance and we got new phones that way no one had are numbers .that went well for awhile then one morning her phone rang while she was in the shower and i answerd it and it was her ex he imeditaly said sorry and they just talking and friends and hung up i confronted my wife with this and she said they just talked so i told her ex,s wife and she jumbed him , then him and his wife called me and he said they had sex had sex and he wanted me to know and he told his wife to but my wife still says nothing happend but texting and phone calls but if that true why would he tell his wife they had sex my wife wants me to forgive and forget again but i cant and it killing me if she would come clean it would be easier to forgive but she swears they did nothing what do i do i dont want to leave my kids and i do love her what to do
Nightsky Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 Looks like troubles from the past are repeating. If it were me I would forgive her for our children’s sake but still break up for the children’s sake. Instead of cheating on her, or letting her continue to cheat on you, why not realize this isn’t going to work out? End it as friendly as possible. No need to get proof she did anything with the other guy. The fact that he has her new number he shouldn’t in conjunction with his wife saying they slept together would be enough for me. Be strong, what ever happens you’ll get through it. You can be proud no matter what you do if you face these obstacles with dignity.
Distant78 Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 Yea man. You should've left when you found out she cheated first. Now both of you cheating on each other and she's cheating some more on top of it. Just divorce. Too many issues to solve.
seibert253 Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 It's real hard to read your post because of the lack of punctuation, but if I get this right she cheated, told you she would stop, cheated again, told you she would stop, then cheated again. How much disrespect and dishonesty are you going to take? You're a pushover and she knows it. Pack her bags and send her on her way, with D papers in hand. She's never going to change. If she was, she would have changed after you gave her the 2nd chance to do right.
Jack & Coke Posted January 1, 2011 Posted January 1, 2011 Seems like you two need to cut your losses, unfortunately.
Lovinhimlovinher Posted January 1, 2011 Posted January 1, 2011 I don't like to jump right to the big D but in this case you don't have much of a choice unless you are willing to live with it. If you are willing to pretend to remain ignorant of the situation then you know it will eat at you until things get real bad. Is it better for your child to deal with 2 adults who can be nice enough to each other to continue to have both parents involved on a regular basis, then to have two parents who are mad and short tempered all of the time? A dad who resents the mom more and more with each passing day. All of this comes out in our behavior even if we don't mean for it to. The question is, do you honestly believe that she will not sleep with him again? This seems to be a recurring thing. You can try to look at it like maybe he told his wife that in the hopes that you will leave her so he can have her, if you actually believe that. I am probably being to hard on the W but for me it isn't the sex that bothers me. It is the lying! How can you have a good marriage with out trust? Not to mention if there is a certain boundry that you are supposed to follow, agreed apon by both parties, then you are breaking the trust that is supposed to keep your family together. One more little thing and I am not trying to sound assy and I know I am not perfect but if you would right click your mouse on the little red squiggly line under your words it usually tells you how to spell it. Good luck to you and your family.
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