Feelin Frisky Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 Haha ok. I'm preparing the email right now! I also keep my word;) That's better. See that you do. :D:D:D:D
Art_Critic Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 This young man has overstepped social boundaries. However, he did indicate to you his intent to come by your work and instead of telling him at that point that you did not want him to you assumed he would not do what he told you he was going to do. Then you are shocked that he did so (perhaps putting himself out in doing so) with the understanding that you gave him your info to follow up with you. At this point I would let this young man know that you have no interest in him and that his level of interest has been a turn off. But in the future when you give a man your contact info, tell him to contact you, and he does so in a manner you are not comfortable with that you put your big girl panties on and behave like a grown up and tell him you have no interest. Great post.. hits all the points...
ascendotum Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 (edited) Perhaps if he had the persistence *and* charm of a Marcello Mastroianni, your response would have been quite different. As is customary, a man's attention is 'creepy' if unwelcome by the lady. Many guys will do their absolute best to be true to their word. He apparently braved a blizzard to meet you. And you didn't have the decency to even greet him. "Kid sister"? A 25 year old man is not going to look at a attractive woman and think kid sister. If that woman gives her a business card that to him will look like a big green light that say's "act now or perhaps loose out". This young man has overstepped social boundaries. However, he did indicate to you his intent to come by your work and instead of telling him at that point that you did not want him to you assumed he would not do what he told you he was going to do. OP - I totally agree with the excerpts from the previous posters here. If a pretty woman handed me her business card I certainly would not ignore it or assume she just wanted to have a new friend to go out and have coffee with. For some guys opportunities like this where girls take the initiative in presenting themselves does not happen all that often, and they dont let it go by. For such a guy it is better than looking back at this and wondering 'what if' I had been a bit more persistant a bunch of years later. Next time you hand out your business card to some guy that you have no romantic interest in, you really need to clarify what your reasons are for wanting to stay in touch. I don't know what country he is from, but maybe there, this sort of over eagerness in wanting to get to know a woman better are not seen in such a negative light. Okay, sending the fax is getting over the top, clue him up and tell him your feelings that you are posting here to us. Edited December 28, 2010 by ascendotum
Author Girlygirl1977 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Posted December 28, 2010 I just saw a friend request on fb now from him too. I sent a msg and said while he seems like a nice person I was surprised he came by my office yesterday. I also said his multiple contacts made me uncomfortable. I did send the expats group email too and wished him well. I think that is a Decent thing to do. He has responded this time asking (last time he just stated) if he can stop by tomorrow and asked for my cell. I will respond that I see no reason to meet. I guess he has only missed carrier pigeon as a method of communication! With his response and everything else, I'm convinced some screws are loose right?!
Eddie Edirol Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 I just saw a friend request on fb now from him too. I sent a msg and said while he seems like a nice person I was surprised he came by my office yesterday. I also said his multiple contacts made me uncomfortable. I did send the expats group email too and wished him well. I think that is a Decent thing to do. He has responded this time asking (last time he just stated) if he can stop by tomorrow and asked for my cell. I will respond that I see no reason to meet. I guess he has only missed carrier pigeon as a method of communication! With his response and everything else, I'm convinced some screws are loose right?! Hes persistent, but you risked that when you gave him your number. hes a guy, the ONLY reason hes asking for your number is to date you. You know this. I dont know why you would give him your card if you werent attracted to him in some way.
Art_Critic Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 I'm convinced some screws are loose right?! In a big way.... All you did was give the guy your card and you got how many contacts out of it ? How many calls and emails and FB requests.. The guy isn't able to see the social cue of "She isn't interested because she won't talk to you" and he keeps contacting out of desperation.
Art_Critic Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 Hes persistent, but you risked that when you gave him your number. hes a guy, the ONLY reason hes asking for your number is to date you. You know this. I dont know why you would give him your card if you werent attracted to him in some way. She might have been attracted but the guy started off wrong and desperate... That is a big turn off.. Are you saying that a woman's attraction is permanent from the get go and a man can do anything without changing that attraction ?
DuskCrush Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 Yeah---just send him an email and let him know that he's a nice guy but your not interested in meeting up with him.
Yamaha Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 As is customary, a man's attention is 'creepy' if unwelcome by the lady. So true. All unwelcome attention, to women, is considered creepy (by them).
Eddie Edirol Posted December 29, 2010 Posted December 29, 2010 She might have been attracted but the guy started off wrong and desperate... That is a big turn off.. Are you saying that a woman's attraction is permanent from the get go and a man can do anything without changing that attraction ? Not at all. She stated in the other thread that she only thought of him as making a new friend. I take that as not bieng attracted.
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