aerogurl87 Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 And if you do, what do you think a soulmate actually is? I believe in them and I've met mine already. For me a soulmate is someone you feel a connection and bond with that cannot be broken by time or space. It is a connection that fills you with limitless love for the other person, no matter what. I don't believe soulmates are always necessarily supposed to be together romantically, but that they are there to help one another through life someway, somehow. Just wondering what other's peoples thoughts on them are.
Feelin Frisky Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Yes. And your definition works for me. A soulmate will just fit like a glove and also be someone you never want to lose. Never. And did I mention, never?
Els Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I believe completely in that, with emphasis on the plural. I disagree with the popular notion that a 'soulmate' is The One, something that you'll never meet or have again, etc. My opinion is that there are a few soulmateS that will pass through each of our lives; some of us are lucky enough to get a LTR with one of them, some are even luckier and marry and live happily ever after... but some of us aren't. As you mentioned, there is no guarantee that a romantic R is necessarily viable with a soulmate.
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I've only met one pair of soulmates, and that was my parents. 57 years, they were married, although they'd known each other 62 years. Ups-and-downs? Quarrels? harsh words? Disagreements? You betcha! Plenty! But within themselves, they were utterly unshakeable. breaking up - over anything - simply wasn't on the cards. Not an option. Unthinkable. Yup, they exist all right. But personally, they're as rare as hen's teeth, I think. What should be normal, is precious and elusive.
OceanGirl Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Eh not really. There are people that you meet with different levels of compatibility.
Jynxx Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Don't believe in them. People change, feelings change, priorities change. It would be naieve to think someone else would change just at the exact pace to keep completing the picture forevermore.
OceanGirl Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 As romantic as I am, I have never met a guy who at any point I thought was my soulmate.
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Well, fortunately my mother has. My father had, too..... Simply because you don't believe in them, it doesn't make them unreal..... It just makes them outside your experiences....
Titania22 Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I would like to share my slightly different definition of a Soulmate. It might sound really weird, but please give it some thought. A soulmate is a person who comes into your life to challenge you to become the best person you can be.
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 And you do the same to them. Figures, huh?
quankanne Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 It is a connection that fills you with limitless love for the other person, no matter what this is exactly how I feel about my two closest friends, one a guy, one a girl. It's like they fill in the missing parts of me and complete me as a person ...
abust1 Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I believe it can happen but ONLY if the two people are already content with themselves and have a fully developed ability for healthy love, i.e. you must have sculpted a finished soul yourself before you can hope to find a true mate for it.
Mme. Chaucer Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I do, in a way. I don't think that there is only one "soul mate" for a person. I believe that there are many, and the "condition" does not have to pertain to romantic love. I agree with the OP; that the love felt for such a person transcends time and space (and in fact, this life). I believe that when we are closely in touch with our own true inner selves, (whatever that is; our own "soul"?) we are able to recognize our "soul mates" when we encounter them. It feels like they've been a part of us before, and will always be. They recognize us, too. I have a few of them in my life. We will never truly part.
TaraMaiden Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I disagree. The only criterion is that you must be selfless enough to put the other person's needs above your own.
Author aerogurl87 Posted December 27, 2010 Author Posted December 27, 2010 I would like to share my slightly different definition of a Soulmate. It might sound really weird, but please give it some thought. A soulmate is a person who comes into your life to challenge you to become the best person you can be. I believe that's true also. To me it's someone who changes your life in a profound way that most people on this Earth will rarely experience. And I didn't believe in soulmates either tell I met the guy who I know is mine. Perhaps there is more than one, but if there are I haven't found them yet.
Feelin Frisky Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 (edited) A soul mate is one who always values the ease or serenity of their SO when communicating issues. He or she will learn to manage their concerns, suspend immediate contentiousness and always err on the side of giving the benefit of the doubt rather than drawing negative conclusions. I don't see that a relationship where someone challenges you to be the best you can is necessarily a soul mate. It's how they go about it that matters in whether they are a soul mate or a nag. Soul mates "sense" each other's dos and don'ts and are fine with surrendering to them to keep the other person happy and reciprocal. I don't believe in heaven. So, this life is the only thing we experience. I want to have someone in it who is clear that now is all we get and now is the time to be considerate and keep us on the best terms with each other as possible. I would make that easy for her because I'm not a tyrant who dictates or weirdo someone can't read. I of course do not want a tyrant who dictates or a weirdo I can't read either. I don't demand that she abandon any faith or share my world view entirely, just keep the peace with each other as a sacred thing. Edited December 27, 2010 by Feelin Frisky
abust1 Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Wow. The variability in these responses makes me believe in soulmates even more!!
zengirl Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 No. I believe there are any number of people who would make good partners and evolve me in different ways. While I will hopefully select just one for life, I don't believe it to be fated.
Enchanted Girl Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 (edited) No. I believe there are any number of people who would make good partners and evolve me in different ways. While I will hopefully select just one for life, I don't believe it to be fated. I agree with this. Although it's good when you're actually in a relationship to believe that that one person you are with is the only person for you. But yea, I had a soul mate like relationship with a guy for five years who broke-up with me this year. Everyone thought we would be together forever, including ourselves. We had so many jokes and little special things that we shared only with each other that it was really intense when we broke up. If I believed in soul mates, I would have had no hope for the future after that. Now, I'm with a different guy and I promise you that it's not actually possible for us to have a deeper relationship then I had with my ex. It will just be different than it was with my ex and hopefully, maybe, it can last a lifetime this time unlike my last one. But even if this one ends, I can always move on and find someone else because there's no such thing as that one person who if you screw things up with you have no chance at love ever in the future. If there was, I'd be depressed because it's so easily for one person or the other to mess everything up! Believing in soul mates is actually a very depressing thing . . . . . what if you don't find them? What if one of you leaves the relationship? What if one of you cheats? What if the law doesn't allow you to marry or society doesn't? I mean, we're all still humans with free wills. There's so much we can mess up. Edited December 27, 2010 by Enchanted Girl
folieadeux Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 I believe in soul mates, but maybe not in the "traditional" sense that most do. I don't necessarily believe that the definition always has to apply in a romantic sense; a soul mate can be anyone that comes into your life you share that bond with.
carhill Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 So, are 'soulmates' only limited to romantic/sexual partners? Why? Can a soulmate be a person not of the gender one is attracted to romantically and/or sexually? My personal criteria is one of longevity. If the *feelings* of connection stand the test of the decades, then the *potential* is valid, though not determinative, IMO. This presumes mutuality. I liken it to a 'twin'.
Author aerogurl87 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Posted December 28, 2010 I agree with this. Although it's good when you're actually in a relationship to believe that that one person you are with is the only person for you. But yea, I had a soul mate like relationship with a guy for five years who broke-up with me this year. Everyone thought we would be together forever, including ourselves. We had so many jokes and little special things that we shared only with each other that it was really intense when we broke up. If I believed in soul mates, I would have had no hope for the future after that. Now, I'm with a different guy and I promise you that it's not actually possible for us to have a deeper relationship then I had with my ex. It will just be different than it was with my ex and hopefully, maybe, it can last a lifetime this time unlike my last one. But even if this one ends, I can always move on and find someone else because there's no such thing as that one person who if you screw things up with you have no chance at love ever in the future. If there was, I'd be depressed because it's so easily for one person or the other to mess everything up! Believing in soul mates is actually a very depressing thing . . . . . what if you don't find them? What if one of you leaves the relationship? What if one of you cheats? What if the law doesn't allow you to marry or society doesn't? I mean, we're all still humans with free wills. There's so much we can mess up. I don't believe in the "one" also as I finally got over the guy that I thought I'd never get over. I met my wonderful boyfriend that I hope to marry one day as him and I are very compatible on multiple levels and make each other extremely happy. I still believe my ex is my soulmate though, and he feels the same way about me. I don't think that lessens the amount of love I feel for my boyfriend or demeans his role in my life. Hence why I don't think "the one" and a "soulmate" are the same as conventional, mainstream wisdom would have us to believe. My ex doesn't "complete me" but we mirror each other on an emotional level that I don't think most people find when they meet someone. I don't know it's hard to describe but the bond that we cultivated is unbreakable and has withstood so many trials that I can't help but believe soulmates exist now. Before I met him I hadn't even given any thought to it, let alone believed in their existence.
pandagirl Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 I don't know if I believe in soulmates, but if there was such a thing, I would think it meant meeting someone who innately understood the core essence of your being. Now, here's the thing -- I think that kind of connection can also be cultivated through time and experiences. I've known my best friend for 27 years. She knows me innately and understands me more than I understand myself. Does that qualify her as my soulmate?
denise_xo Posted December 28, 2010 Posted December 28, 2010 I believe in soul mates, but maybe not in the "traditional" sense that most do. I don't necessarily believe that the definition always has to apply in a romantic sense; a soul mate can be anyone that comes into your life you share that bond with. Agree with this. Don't know if that actually has anything to do with 'souls' being 'mates', but it's a wonderful thing when it happens.
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