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broken heart but maybe blessing in disguise

ginastar

By ginastar
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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ginastar Established Member

ginastar

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hey,

has anyone ever been really hurt by an ex but later found that it was a blessing in disguise and met someone much better??

USMCHokie Established Member

USMCHokie

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Absolutely. I haven't necessarily found anyone better who is also interested in me, but I'm definitely glad my ex left...we weren't right for each other...so yes, looking back, it was certainly a blessing in disguise...

b_rouse Established Member

b_rouse

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I can't say I've met someone better, but I'm glad the break up happened. While it made me dissect every inch of the break up, putting him and myself under a microscope, I realized a lot of things I did wrong in the relationship.

 

And I know people say don't blame yourself, but I have to say, I did a lot of horrible things to him (which if they were different, we would be together still), I was a terrible, selfish person. While I can't go back and change who I was, nor can I prove to him now that I have changed (he's with a girl that apparently he's super happy about), all I can do is wish him the best and continue to better myself and hope to never put someone through what I put him through.

 

So I guess, while I'm not fully over my ex, and I know I don't want to get back together with him, I know I don't want to be the same person I was to him.

 

I'm hoping this is my blessing in disguise...

january2010 Established Member

january2010

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Every single time. I don't know how the universe is going to top the last one unless the next one is the mythical and mysterious "the one." :laugh:

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ginastar Established Member

ginastar

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im hoping that is the case for me :(

Fern Established Member

Fern

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I think that, deep down, I've always known my split was for the best. Even as I was freaking out and trawling the internet for ways to get him back. :o

I had been miserable with him for such a long time I'd forgotten that relationships were meant to enrich your life. Even if I'm never with anyone else again, I'm better off single than in that relationship. The universe had some lessons for me to learn and I'm taking those onboard.

I really loved him, but he's not capable at this point in time of loving anyone properly. I deserve better than he's capable of. I will be OK. :)

b_rouse Established Member

b_rouse

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Even as I was freaking out and trawling the internet for ways to get him back. :o

 

Glad to know I wasn't the only one! :)

Fern Established Member

Fern

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Glad to know I wasn't the only one! :)

 

I'm ashamed to admit I even paid money for one of those stupid e-books. I was DEMENTED with the notion of 'winning' him back. I barely remember that first 6-8 weeks. Thank God. :o

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ginastar Established Member

ginastar

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hey fern, is ur ex with another girl now?

Fern Established Member

Fern

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hey fern, is ur ex with another girl now?

 

Yes. They're perfect for each other. She was two-timing her fiancee with him whilst he was two-timing me. :o

 

In retrospect, it's the only way that car crash could ever have ended. Neither of us was capable of calling it quits. So unhealthy, now I look back. Lesson learned. :)

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ginastar Established Member

ginastar

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u seem so strong! good for you. wish i was as strong

Fern Established Member

Fern

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I'm full of sh*t. :)

 

I cried buckets today over him. But I feel OK again now.

 

But positive thinking DOES help. I try not to let myself be negative. Or at least try to snap out of it as quickly as I can.

 

He's only a man. He's not even a particularly impressive one. This too will pass.

durkadurka Established Member

durkadurka

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Sure, I'm not going to be paying out the ass to support her family until they are in the grave. I'm not paying tuition I can't afford, and I'm not unemployed because I didn't move down to be with her.

 

On the flip side, I've lost one of the most amazing people in the world.

 

It's an incredible and challenging juxtaposition of feelings.

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ginastar Established Member

ginastar

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yea. at least ur ex is far away? i wish mine would move far away.

LifeIsGreat Established Member

LifeIsGreat

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A broken heart is always a blessing in disguise- if you handle it properly. If handled properly it can help you to grow and learn, and makes you a better person.

fltc Established Member

fltc

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hey, has anyone ever been really hurt by an ex but later found that it was a blessing in disguise and met someone much better??

 

OH, YES! I can't believe how much better off I am now and how lucky I am that my first prospect cheated and my second dumped me!

thatsonlyme Established Member

thatsonlyme

Posted
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hey,

has anyone ever been really hurt by an ex but later found that it was a blessing in disguise and met someone much better??

 

I think almost everything bad that happen in our lives has a potential of being a blessing in disguise if you accept it as such. All you need to do is take it as an opportunity to learn and improve yourself, make your life better and become a better person.

 

In my case, I haven't met anybody yet and it's been over 4 months since breakup. I've learned from my mistakes though. My social life has improved tremendously, something I'd been lacking in a relationship. My financial situation has gotten worse but I'm working on improving that aspect of my life as well. I have become more confident, strong, active and interesting person. I've learned to be happy by myself, I'm not needy anymore as I used to be. I've realized that I'm attractive, while my ex made me feel completely opposite. I've lost 20 pounds and I feel better then ever!

 

All this progress didn't happen overnight but I was determined to improve my life and myself as a person. only few months ago I cried every night, hated myself and my life, wanted my ex back badly. Not anymore. I'm not doing NC anymore but I hardly ever talk to her now. I have nothing to say and I don't care how is she doing. When she calls I pick up the phone though and I'm not playing games anymore, waiting few days to call her back or anything like that. I treat her as a casual acquaintance and that's it!

 

Some of you may remember my story and how much I suffered. If I could make it, you can too! Life is great and I'm happy we're not together anymore. Definitely a blessing for me ;)

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