lala82 Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 I have posted in these forum different times. As some of you know, I split up with my ex bf 4 months ago. Since them, we have not had any contact. We split up for several reasons. He came to visit me to Colombia from Saudi Arabia last summer. The reason of his trip was he wanted to see and he was thinking to get marry with me in the future. After he left he told me that he was not sure. When he called me we used to have arguments, because of his jealousy. Then, he split up with me in msn. I deleted him from facebook, msn and skype. He sent me three e-mails that I did not replay. In these e-mails he apologize for hurt me and that he wish circumstances between both of us were different. Yesterday, when I was on msn he contacted me again. He appears like he was offline, but he wasn't. He told me that he just want to say me X-mas. I told him the same. Then, he told me that he hope that me and my family were well. I told him that I wish the best for him and his family. After, that I saw that he was writing something, but he never sent it. So, I decided to logout 20 minutes later. Honestly, I was quite upset yesterday. There were a lot of memories. We were 3.5 years together and we lived a year together. But, he decided to move to The Middle East and me I decided to back to Colombia. Also, yesterday his mum and I exchanged a couple of e-mails; but we did not talk about him. Just, I wanted to share this with you. I do not know what to think about him. PD: Merry X-mas everyone!
Taucher Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 3.5 years together is a really long time so I am not surprised if you feel sad and emotional. Did he give you any reasons for splitting up with you? And if you are emailing his Mum it shows how close you two really were. But even if you and his Mum did not talk about him, he is the reason that you know each other. When I have split up with girls in the past I have cut contact with her, her family AND friends. Do you want him back? T Feliz Navidad!
Author lala82 Posted December 25, 2010 Author Posted December 25, 2010 Thanks for replied Taucher. Feliz Navidad!! He told me that he split up with me, because he wasn't ready to take the next step. Also, he told me because he is in Saudi and me in Colombia and because we argued a lot. I was very angry with him, because he split with me on msn. I found quite immature to split up through msn, when we were 3.5 years together. His family were very nice with me. I spent with them four x-mas and all my b-days. I went with them for some holidays in Europe. His parents gave to my ex-bf some money to pay the deposit of the flat were we lived in London. Even, her mother stayed with me in the flat, before I travel to Colombia. She helped me to organize some stuff in the flat and took me to Heathrow to take my plane to Colombia. I do not know if I want him back or not. Honestly, I do not know. The only thing I know it's that I am quite upset that things end so bad between us.
Taucher Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 I can understand why you were upset about how it ended. I remember seeing another thread where someone asked how to end it with someone when you are in LDR. It's hard I think. Was it because you didnt want to move to Saudi Arabia and he didnt want to move to Colombia? Is he a commitment phobe? Anyway, I think 4 months is not enough time to get over a 3.5 year relationship. My last relationship was nearly 5 years and it took me a year to feel better about that one. Do you think there is any chance you will get back together? BEcause if not, I would suggest not contacting him and ignoring him if he contacts you. T
Author lala82 Posted December 26, 2010 Author Posted December 26, 2010 When he accepted his job in Saudi he had to move alone for a year. He signed a two years contract. After the first year, he could bring his wife or partner to Saudi. I was not sure, if I wanted to go there or not. I like to feel free without any social restrictions and I want to start to gain experience on my field. However, when he moved there seemed like he was enjoy his life a lot all the time. He told me that social life there is amazing, that he had met a lot of people. He used to call me less and less, because he was very busy. He does like Colombia. However, he told me that he will come until 2012 to improve his Spanish. But honestly, I think that he is a commitment phobe, who does not know what he wants. When, he came to visit me. He cried and told me that he loves me and he did not want to lose me. But, that he wasn't sure to make a commitment. Even, that a month before to came he told me he had future plans for us. I do not know if there is any change to back with him. I have changed in a big way after all the horrible way he behaved with me. I do not know if I will back to England next month.
creighton0123 Posted December 26, 2010 Posted December 26, 2010 You're hurt. He broke up with you after 3.5 years of dating. Still, he expressed that he wasn't happy in the relationship due to a number of reasons. Perhaps you should think about moving on and finding someone who you will be completely happy with?
Author lala82 Posted December 26, 2010 Author Posted December 26, 2010 Creighton: Thanks for your replied. You are right. I need to move on. As I said before, I decided to do not have any contact with him after the break. I was ok, until he contacted me again. I need to be strong and ignore him. I have met a new guy, who lives in Argentina. He is nice and like him. But I need to time to know him better and clear completely my mind.
Author lala82 Posted December 26, 2010 Author Posted December 26, 2010 Today is my b-day. He sent me a text to my mobile phone. Just to wish me a happy b-day with a kiss. I sent him a short msg to him. Just I said thanks for the msg and hope he was well.
Taucher Posted December 27, 2010 Posted December 27, 2010 Feliz Cumple! Yes, time to move on! But if your new man lives in Argentina, why are you thinking of coming back to England? Maybe this new man is too soon? T
Author lala82 Posted December 29, 2010 Author Posted December 29, 2010 After my MSC I have the option to work on my field in The UK for 2 years. I like Argentina, but my family is not sure if move to Argentina it would be the best option for me. I want to chose the best professional option for me. I do not want move just for a man. My Argentinean guy is nice and lovely , but I need to know him better. My ex bf sent me another e-mail again yesterday. He told me that he hope I had a nice b-day. Then, he said that he often thinks about me and that he wishes I will be happy. Also, that family and friends are the most important things on life and kisses. I wonder why he wrote that. The e-mail sound quite philosophical about life... Anyway, I replied and I said “thanks for your msg and good wishes. I had a nice b-day. I am still celebrating my b-day"
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