nice-easy-day Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 Here is a reply that was a bit of a hijack but I wanted to respond to. I'll paste it and respond. this just happened to me. back on the 30th of nov i told a girl that i was interested in her over a text message, (ofcourse i knew her in person she was a personal friend of mine and ive been texting her for 3 weeks) and i never got a response. She went MIA for about a week, always going offline on facebook when i log on, not texing me etc. Still today I havnt texted her since that day cos i feel like im gonna annoy her. But now we still communicate through fb (not chat tho) like nothing happend and im still hung up on her. And it kills me that I never got a response. What do you guys think do i still have a chance if I give it some time? she is a friend of mine and we are gonna see eachother sometime cos we have same group of friends.
Author nice-easy-day Posted December 25, 2010 Author Posted December 25, 2010 Most people are going to tell you to move on. I see you as being fortunate to still be in contact with her through facebook messages and although your chances with her are nill... it's not impossible. It's all how you play it from this point on. You did the right thing by backing off. Just ask yourself if this girl is really worth pursuing because it's not going to fall right in your lap and you might spend a lot of time and effort only to find out there is no chance she'll ever be interested. Personally I think people bail too quickly on potential relationships. Meaning, you have a few good dates and the interest is lost for whatever reason. These are the ones that are worth revisiting in the future or LIGHTLY pursuing because you never really know what's happening in their life at the moment. Could be any number of reasons. I've been down this road before and the most important thing to do is back off and move on in life. I know it's cliche but I mean it. Look for other women and in your heart move on. Nothing wrong with keeping someone on the back burner, just don't expect anything. I've had luck keeping in contact with old flames that turned out to be friendships. I've also had old flames that I could have rekindled but I wasn't interested anymore. It just happens. I say go with the flow and keep a tiny amount of effort into it.
refurb Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 I had this happen to me this year. I showed a lot of interest in a girl, asked her out, she said NOTHING (just changed the subject). I backed off, dated other people, now she's showing a lot more interest. So my advice to you is, back off and revert back to your old relationship dynamics (it's hard I know). Be friendly to her, but DON'T make yourself available. Subtlety let her know that things are "cool" between you, but that you've got your own life to live. The ball is in her court. Three reasons: 1. If she's not interested or just not sure about it, she'll appreciate the fact that you're not making a big deal about it. 2. Often letting someone know you're interested changes how they view you. She may never have considered you that way, but now when you interact, she may start noticing things about you that she likes. 3. If you don't push it, you'll come across as more confident and someone with options. Everyone finds that attractive. Good luck!! RF
Author nice-easy-day Posted December 25, 2010 Author Posted December 25, 2010 I agree with Refurb on all his points. Keep the door open but never push the envelope so to speak. I think it's really important to pick up some new hobbies too. Maybe there is something that she is into that YOU like too. Pursue that interest without letting her know. If there was initial interest from your date I think it's possible to slowly kindle things but it's not going to work if you actively pursue her. Let go, move on and keep some light contact. You're also in a much better position if you have the same circle of friends and are able to bump into her once a month or so. I'm a chaser, I like a challenge and want to pursue a girl because it makes me feel like I'm getting something for my money. I'm not big on "she doesn't seem interested anymore so just launch".
rhonian Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 For starters, however small the percentage chance, are you sure she got your text? Secondly, lets assume she got your text, you set the situation in motion by contacting her to let her know how you felt about her. Only thing to do now, is sit back and wait, if she's interested she will let you know. Could of been bad timing when you sent it and "if so" when her situation changes she will let you know.
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