Ewww Cooties Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 Hey all, first time here. Looking for some opinions, just out of curiosity. WARNING: I overthink things! Haha; but I'm OK with that. :-) I was having a nice and very personal conversation with a girl that I'm becoming interested in the other day (started as a professional relationship, moved on to a friendship, and I can see the possibility of it moving towards something more). This girl is confident, ambitious, smart, funny, beautiful, and it's pretty clear to see why she has a lot of men (including myself) that become very attracted to her. Her and I are very much on the same page about a lot of things; I feel I'm generally a good judge of character and here, I don't get the feeling that she is playing games - she seems very open, honest, and straightforward to me. Anyways, the topic of this conversation was mostly relationships - her past relationships and her reflections on them. At some point she started describing to me how she has a lot of men that are attracted to her. She didn't go into detail, she didn't overdo this point, she didn't take on a cocky tone, she just kind of talked about it very matter-of-factly. In fact, she said "I seem to have a lot of men attracted to me" as if she didn't know why - but this girl is extremely confident and normally very frank and that wording was a bit unusual to me. Still, I don't know if I was misreading, but the way she looked at me when she said it was different than the way she had been looking at me for the rest of the conversation, although it was so subtle that I can't really tell what the look was. My question is: When a woman mentions, seemingly casually, that she finds herself to frequently be the subject of the attention of many men, is it really that "casual" of a thing to say? There are a couple of ways to interpret this. She could be saying "men find me attractive", trying to set her up in a man's mind as an attractive and desirable woman, thus building up that man's attraction to her. On the other hand, she could be giving a polite warning: "Men are always all over me, it's uncomfortable, please don't do this." Or she could just simply be stating a fact with no hidden intentions at all. I realize I'm leaving out a lot of context and that the question is very general, but I am just curious to hear others' thoughts about it. Personally, I'm playing my relationship with her by ear, I'm not yet at the point where I want to make any moves but, when I am, you'll probably see more of me on this forum because, man, this one could get complicated, haha. :-) Thanks!!
laRubiaBonita Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 without any other context than what you gave- i would think maybe she is telling you that she may know you like her, and that that is ok- it won't wierd her out, because she deals with having lots of men like her all the time. OR she may be saying, that she knows you like her.... and she want to let you know that there is other competion.... ? my two cents
Feelin Frisky Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 Hi Eww, welcome to LS. I'm affraid I have nothing to offer on your question. I think you'll just have to play that by ear too. It's hard to tell what she intended from here and I wouldn't speculate that women in general would say the same thing and mean it the same way as a hard rule. She just may have been feeling her oats--you know, like, "if you get me, you'll be getting a prestige lay because everyone wants me". Good luck. Who doesn't want a prestige lay? When you die and go to heaven, the angels will say here comes the guy who got to boink you know who.
elaina Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 My question is: When a woman mentions, seemingly casually, that she finds herself to frequently be the subject of the attention of many men, is it really that "casual" of a thing to say? There are a couple of ways to interpret this. She could be saying "men find me attractive", trying to set her up in a man's mind as an attractive and desirable woman, thus building up that man's attraction to her. On the other hand, she could be giving a polite warning: "Men are always all over me, it's uncomfortable, please don't do this." Or she could just simply be stating a fact with no hidden intentions at all. I realize I'm leaving out a lot of context and that the question is very general, but I am just curious to hear others' thoughts about it. Personally, I'm playing my relationship with her by ear, I'm not yet at the point where I want to make any moves but, when I am, you'll probably see more of me on this forum because, man, this one could get complicated, haha. :-) Thanks!! Lol I don't know, but it could mean that she might know you are interested in her too and that she has a lot of decisions to make so yeah keep in mind, you have a lot of competition. I wonder if she is being bombarded with date offers? Good luck!!! Hope you get the girl!
waynesworld Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 It could mean nothing, or it could mean any of the things the other posters mentioned. I'll add that it could also be a test: are you the insecure type to be bothered by the fact that there are many other guys interested in her? If you show that you are, you'll be instantly lowered in her eyes. The important thing is that you have no control over those other guys and what they do. Just get this girl's number, take her out and show her a great time.
wheream_i Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 After that comment, I wouldn't even give her the hint that you're into her. She'll be on your nuts in no time wondering why you're the only man not giving her the attention she thinks she deserves.
2sure Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 She says: "I attract a lot of men." This means... what? could mean: I am an easy target OR I smell like ham
biochemgrl Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I know if I say that to someone it's because I'm uncomfortable sometimes and never feel like I can respond the right way to say no and still be nice. I had a few strangers yell at me for not responding to cat calls. So, idk if she's a big flirty person, it's really all about who she is and how she views and treats people. Also, healthy care of her body and a body pull of stuff are very different- Good luck
Jannah Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 She says: "I attract a lot of men." This means... what? could mean: I am an easy target OR I smell like ham 2sure, the ham comment, priceless!
zengirl Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 This reminds me of something: My boyfriend teased me the other day because I said, offhand (in a conversation about our friend's dating habits) that I've always gotten asked out a lot. I wasn't really boasting, and I definitely wasn't fishing, or really even doing anything. He teased me a moment, then laughed and said, Of course, I have because I'm beautiful and awesome, blahblahblah mushcakes. Not the point. The point is, sometimes people just say things because they've thought them and they seem to be true. I do get asked out a lot. Maybe she does attract a lot of men. Not a nice thing to go around saying ALL the time, but I wouldn't think anything of just once.
biochemgrl Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 Men will hit on anything all day, and anywhere. She means buying a sandwich and someone saying a weird/sexual comment, stuff like that happens to all women all the time. If she is friends and ix not jealous of other beautiful women, that's a keeper. Girl's are *******'s to the pretty girls more than you think.
wheream_i Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 a body pull of stuff are very different- Good luck What is a body pull of stuff?
Author Ewww Cooties Posted December 23, 2010 Author Posted December 23, 2010 (edited) Whoa, didn't expect that many replies! Thanks guys! Who doesn't want a prestige lay? When you die and go to heaven, the angels will say here comes the guy who got to boink you know who. I'm visiting family for the holidays and the laugh you got out of me with that one definitely attracted some attention, LOL. After that comment, I wouldn't even give her the hint that you're into her. She'll be on your nuts in no time wondering why you're the only man not giving her the attention she thinks she deserves. That's the way I've been handling it. I didn't even acknowledge the comment. Honestly, I absolutely love talking to her - I know she knows she's hot and I've been avoiding concentrating on her physical appearance because I figure she gets enough of it already, but it really takes an incredible amount of willpower to keep eye contact with her eyes... I've been trying to stick to non-physical compliments, along the lines of "I really admire your accomplishments" and "Well obviously you did a good job, would you really have it any other way?". They're honest, and she seems to appreciate them, plus it's building up a nice bit of physical tension for me at least, too, which I don't mind - with luck, she has similar feelings! :-) could mean: ... I smell like ham ... So, idk if she's a big flirty person, it's really all about who she is and how she views and treats people. Also, healthy care of her body and a body pull of stuff are very different- ... If she is friends and ix not jealous of other beautiful women, that's a keeper. She's sort of medium flirty - she's not very touchy-feely and she's not in to public affection so much, but she is very social and has no reservations about her sexiness; she seems very comfortable with herself. She is a very positive person and seems to have a lot of respect for others, this is one of her qualities that attracts me the most, in fact. She takes excellent care of herself, physically and, from what I can tell, emotionally as well. I don't get the impression that she has any bad feelings towards other beautiful women, I think it stems from her confidence, but I also have never seen her in a situation where jealousy might pop up. Still getting to know her. She is a very nice person, very caring and very... "mom-like". Most of her insecurities seem to center around not causing emotional pain for others - but I don't yet know her well enough to know if that's something noble or a red flag. :-) FWIW we're both around the same age in our (very) late 20's (read: I still have a few months of 29 left). Thanks again guys, really interesting reads here! Edited December 23, 2010 by Ewww Cooties
runner Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 (edited) yea i've been fed this comment a couple times, and think too much of it as well first of all, rule number one- attractive women will garner male attention. this is fact. so when a good looking girl tells me this, part of me thinks, "yea okay. way to state the obvious, lady." ...and i think she's being a bit full of herself. but i don't mean that in a bad way; i kinda like the swagger in it on the other hand, when there's an obvious attraction between us, part of me tends to read that as, "look, dude, you better up your game cos she's getting bloody impatient with this slow bull****." hence forth, i've upped my game soon enough. so i guess, altogether, i'm not too bothered when women say things like that Edited December 23, 2010 by runner just because
NoLongerSad Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 Anyways, the topic of this conversation was mostly relationships - her past relationships and her reflections on them. You make a good hankie. Friend zone. Next.
catgotyourtongue Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 She says: "I attract a lot of men." This means... what? could mean: I am an easy target OR I smell like ham LOL I think it must be about the HAM, you HAM. Funny stuff.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 She says: "I attract a lot of men." This means... what? That depends entirely upon where she does indeed attract a lot of men.
DuskCrush Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 Maybe she meant--"oh I'm meeting a lot of men that want to sleep with me but not many that want something serious." Anyway--be careful it seems like you might be becoming her friend. You better ask her out soon.
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