AngeletteX Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I don’t know if this post will have an impact on anyone but I felt compelled to put it out there. Last night I was dealing with a suicidal friend (under a different context, she’s not in an A) and I told her even though we all crave some sort of stability in our lives, THE ONLY THING CONSTANT IN LIFE IS CHANGE. I wanted to share this thought with those who are hurting (not that I think any of you are suicidal btw, just dealing with a lot of pain like my friend) because if you are hurting due to NC today - that feeling will change. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not the next day. But it WILL change. I guarantee it. I don’t think it matters whether NC was decided by you or for you - because ultimately what it is, is a change. And changes are usually never as smooth as we’d like it to be. Going away to school, starting a new job, having a baby, losing a parent - all these things are about moving from one situation to another and they do not happen without some sort of struggle. It’s the same with NC. When you are in the middle of being in pain (or uncertainty, or confusion, or chaos etc), what you want is for all of it to “just go away”. It’s human nature to be impatient and want things to happen Right Now. When we broke a toy as a child, we wanted it fixed. When we lose our jobs, we want a new one. When we hurt, we want to NOT hurt. Right Now or As Soon As Possible. But sometimes transitions are like baking a cake. You measure out the ingredients, mix the batter and place it in the oven. Checking on it constantly will not make it bake any faster. You just have to trust that when the timer goes off, the cake will be done. So trust yourself and know that you have taken the right steps for your life (measuring and mixing), trust the Universe that the right things have happened or are happening in your life even if you can’t see the positive outcome Right Now (the baking). And believe that when the timer goes off, the life you’ll be living will be perfect for YOU. I’ll leave you with one of my favorite quotes: Never think that God’s delays are God’s denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius. ~Comte de Buffon P.S. My friend is still alive…..but I worry about her pain.
january2010 Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I'm sorry to hear about your friend. But you're right, there is no fast-forward button, no time machine. We just have to live and deal with each moment as it arrives.
jthorne Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I like your baking analogy. Hope your friend gets better.
pureinheart Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 Angel...this is powerful...thank you for sharing this with us! I am glad your friend is alive, you are a good friend BTW...
donnamaybe Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 What a great post, and how thoughtful of you to put so much time and effort into it. Very eloquent.
Suki18 Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I am so sorry about your friend. I know that feeling and it is really hard. It takes time to heal the pain and when your in that situation that time seems like forever. I hope only the best for your friend.
flowergirl77 Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I don’t know if this post will have an impact on anyone but I felt compelled to put it out there. Last night I was dealing with a suicidal friend (under a different context, she’s not in an A) and I told her even though we all crave some sort of stability in our lives, THE ONLY THING CONSTANT IN LIFE IS CHANGE. I wanted to share this thought with those who are hurting (not that I think any of you are suicidal btw, just dealing with a lot of pain like my friend) because if you are hurting due to NC today - that feeling will change. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not the next day. But it WILL change. I guarantee it. I don’t think it matters whether NC was decided by you or for you - because ultimately what it is, is a change. And changes are usually never as smooth as we’d like it to be. Going away to school, starting a new job, having a baby, losing a parent - all these things are about moving from one situation to another and they do not happen without some sort of struggle. It’s the same with NC. When you are in the middle of being in pain (or uncertainty, or confusion, or chaos etc), what you want is for all of it to “just go away”. It’s human nature to be impatient and want things to happen Right Now. When we broke a toy as a child, we wanted it fixed. When we lose our jobs, we want a new one. When we hurt, we want to NOT hurt. Right Now or As Soon As Possible. But sometimes transitions are like baking a cake. You measure out the ingredients, mix the batter and place it in the oven. Checking on it constantly will not make it bake any faster. You just have to trust that when the timer goes off, the cake will be done. So trust yourself and know that you have taken the right steps for your life (measuring and mixing), trust the Universe that the right things have happened or are happening in your life even if you can’t see the positive outcome Right Now (the baking). And believe that when the timer goes off, the life you’ll be living will be perfect for YOU. I’ll leave you with one of my favorite quotes: Never think that God’s delays are God’s denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius. ~Comte de Buffon P.S. My friend is still alive…..but I worry about her pain. I feel like this was written just for me! Just the reminder I needed to day.Thanks.
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